Stockholm Syndrome
by xheartxcorex
Summary: Stockholm Syndrome : A psychological condition in which the hostage emotionally bonds to their captor. The Joker abducts Rachel in order to lure Batman and they both start developing odd..'feelings' i suck at summary's just R&R Joker/Rachel.
1. Chapter 1 Abduction

_Hey there fellow Readers, like many of you I love The Joker, and i was simply mesmerized by Heath's Joker in The Dark Knight. It has been a long while since my last fanfic and i read back on that and i cringe... i hope that my writing has improved at least a little bit since some of my earlier fics. this is my first Batman fanfic. and since someother people had been writing some wonderful fanfics on this particular pairing i thought hey why not i'll give it ago too. its an interesting pairing, one that would never happen.. but thats why i like it. fascinating indeed. So here is my Joker/Rachel fanfic. it ain't gonna be pretty, for one thing can we really see anytype of relationship with the Joker being 'pretty' so i'm up for constructive critisism and all that jazz and hopefully this fic goes well, because at this point in time, i have no idea where its going, i don't plan things... im not a schemer XD i just do..things hahe.  
thanks and ...er Enjoy?  
Disclaimer : I DO NOT OWN BATMAN OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS ASSOCIATED ..ETC ETC.. yadda yadda you get the point yes? i dont own em'... oh but if i did sighs _

xheartxcorex

This fic is dedicated to Heath Ledger  
1979-2008

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**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter one : Abducted

**_Stockholm Syndrome :A psychological condition in which the hostage emotionally bonds to their captor _**

Rachel stared up at the ceiling contemplating her night; to say that it was eventful would be an understatement. The night had been so long, so eventful that she couldn't stop replaying the events in her head, leaving her restless, causing sleep to become impossible.

Rachel groaned, squeezing her eyes shut as the image of The Joker appeared in her mind again.  
Her skin crawled just thinking of his eyes boring into hers as he told her the stories of his scars. Yet, despite the fact that the entire time she felt this sickening feeling in the pit of her stomach she couldn't help but be intrigued by this man, Intrigued, fascinated whatever a person would want to call it. It was making her crazy, she nearly died. She replayed that thought in her head again, she nearly died!

Falling from the building, feeling the wind all around her, sliding down the glass windows to her death, the only thing she could hear was the blood curdling scream that erupted from her throat. Of course she knew that Bruce wouldn't let her just fall to her death, she knew he would save her, but falling from that height, falling through the air with nothing to grab onto, nothing to help yourself with was terrifying.

It was because of him…. The madman with the painted face. Another thing that bothered Rachel immensely was the fact that she couldn't get his face out of her head. His eyes, looking into them, it was like that saying. The eyes can be like a mirror into a persons soul.. But looking into this mans eyes it frightened her to see that she couldn't decipher what she saw. Even imagining those almost hollow eyes it scared her… yet once again intrigued her, and what exactly was the joker hiding underneath that makeup. There were the scars of course but they would still be obvious without the makeup. Rachel couldn't help but wonder what he would look like without the makeup. Would he somehow look less insane? Less psychotic? Rachel nearly laughed to herself… no.. It wasn't the makeup that made him insane, he simply.. Was. It was that look he gave you, that eerie smile that appeared on his face, it was in his laugh, the way he cackled with glee at almost anything. It was in his voice. His voice…. Rachel thought. His voice was hypnotic, remembering the way he grabbed her face raising that blade to the delicate skin of her cheek, she wanted nothing more than to tune out what ever he was saying, but she couldn't. it was a voice you simply couldn't help but listen to. A voice that held many things, many hidden meanings, metaphors.  
It was insane! Out of all the things that she should be worrying about she was thinking about this person, the man who tried to kill her, who's trying to kill the two people she loves most. She groaned again that in itself was a complication that she did not want to think about. Bruce and Harvey, she loved them both, she really did. Bruce was her first love and her best friend she knew that no matter what 

happened she would always love him, but though it killed her, she knew it wasn't meant to be for them. The lines between where Bruce Wayne ended and Batman began had begun to blur so much that it seemed it you couldn't have one without the other, Rachel was beginning to accept that, Bruce needed Batman and that was how it was always going to be, she honestly couldn't see him ever giving Batman up.  
Harvey Dent, Gotham's white Knight so he was called. There were so many things that Rachel could say about Harvey, she didn't even know where to begin. Did she love him? Yes. Did she feel the same love for him as she did for Bruce?…. She wasn't sure. Did she want to marry him? Rachel contemplated that a little more.

'He basically proposed to me tonight' Rachel thought. 'He wants to spend the rest of his life with me' but did she want to spend the rest of her life with him. She didn't know. She loved him so much it hurt sometimes and he made her feel warm and almost complete, as complete as she could ever be without that piece of her heart that would always and forever belong to Bruce Wayne.  
She couldn't help but smile when thinking of Harvey, he was such a good man, with so much to offer and she couldn't imagine a life without him. Her smile widened.

She could not imagine a life where she would not have Harvey, a life that she would not be able to spend those early mornings waking up beside him. Suddenly she couldn't understand what made her so reluctant to simply agree to his question jump into his arms and have her wicked way with him right there in front of everyone!...though that would have been slightly awkward.

That was it then. Rachel Dawes had her answer for Harvey Dent, and it was yes. She couldn't help but let a little girly giggle escape from her mouth. Sleep seemed so far away, excitement overwhelmed her, and she started to wonder if she should just drive to Harvey's to tell him her answer right then and there.

That's when she heard it…. She stopped breathing, afraid to. She heard it again. A movement in her apartment. Rachel felt her heart start to pick up, she remembered locking the door, she swore she locked the door, who was she kidding she always freaking locked the door, especially since a psychopathic clown man was on the loose.  
She slowly got out of her bed and opened her bedroom door, making sure not to make much noise.  
she bit her lip as the door let out an loud squeaking noise.  
When the door was opened she let out a scream of surprise as she came face to face with a painted face with a wide red grin.

"Good evening Raaachel!"

She opened her mouth to scream again but before the sound came out the Joker had clasped a hand over her mouth his face disturbingly close to hers. He wasn't wearing gloves this time, she could feel the texture of the skin of his hands and it shocked her that they felt surprisingly soft.

"Shhh shh sh!, now now! Wouldn't want to wake the neighbours would we!" he said a sly grin forming on his face. "I'm going to take away my hand and you of course are not going to scream your pretty little head like a banshee ooooo-kay!" The Joker removed his hand and Rachel let a breath she didn't know she had been holding  
"there we go!, see no need to alert the troops I'm just here for a little chat! SO, we, meaning yourself and I are going to take a little walk" The Joker said taking another step if possible closer to Rachel.

Rachel scoffed

"Yeah, because I'm just going to come with you now and go for an evening stroll"

"yeaaaaah, see I figured that might be a problem, seeing as I tried to kill you earlier this evening, now Rachel, I can call you Rachel right? Yeah Rachel, I just want you to know, it was nothing personal.. but it was a good way to distract Batman don't… you….think" He smiled

Rachel frowned "Do you think that I'm just going to come with you now because you say it wasn't personal that you threw me from a building?...your crazy"

"technically I didn't throw you it was more of drop…".The Joker took another step back "and no I'm not" he muttered seeming annoyed  
"You know… I'm really getting very tired of people saying that to me, it hurts my feelings, I have a heart too you know I have feelings" he said putting a hand to his chest.  
Rachel scoffed "you don't have a heart; you couldn't have to have done the things that you've done"

The Joker sighed, getting more annoyed with the conversation. He looked at his wrist feigning looking at a watch "You know Miss Dawes, its getting very late, tick tock tick tock, we need to get a move on,"  
"your not wearing a watch.." Rachel said in confusion  
"I'm not?" The Joker said raising his eyebrows "oh well, come on come on come on time waits for no one"  
"I told you already, _Joker_ I'm not going anywhere with you" Rachel said putting every amount of anger into her glare.  
The Joker sighed "Yeah.. I didn't think you would… that's why I didn't give you a choice" he said. Before Rachel could react The Joker had pinned her to the wall with his weight.  
Rachel gasped, this was closer than he'd ever been, and he was literally all she could feel besides the wall supporting their weight.

The Joker reached into his pocket pulling out a syringe, Rachel's eyes widened in horror  
"where the hell are you putting that!" she squeaked in fear, The Joker laughed, showing rows of yellowed teeth.  
"Fear not, Miss Dawes, just a little something to help you sleep"

Rachel tried to struggle out The Joker's grasp but he was too strong, Rachel gasped in pain as he injected the syringe into her neck feeling darkness creep into her vision, feeling her head become clouded and fuzzy she collapsed encased in The Jokers arms.

_Soo, here we go  
Now i'm not actually too sure how i feel about it  
I think perhaps they are both a little out of character, but im up for advice on how to help for that.  
oh well i hope you liked it xD  
... now.. review damn it!  
review like you've never reviewed before!!_

..._man i need a life sighs  
(seriously dudes... review :D ) _

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	2. Chapter 2 Blood

_hahe yes yes yes i've been a busy little bee. two chapters in one day, though they are very short, so depending on your perspective perhaps its actually around the size of one chapter simply split into too what ever way you look on it, it took me for bleedin' ever!! Rachel and The Joker are much harder to write than i thought. im still worried about the OOC-ness. and i'm a little worried that I'm making Rachel a little one dimensional a little mary-sue-ish hopefully she will develop more as the story progress's. give it time i always say..well i dont really always say that...someone does though. .. .  
heres the next installment of my masterpiece.. Stockholm Syndrome.. in which thing start getting a little interesting. _

_disclaimer : i dont own it... duh? if i did would i be writing.. perhaps mediocre fanfictions on posting them on here? i do not think so. _

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME  
**

chapter two : Blood

The Joker sighed for the millionth time watching Rachel laying there unconscious, he really thought that she would of woken by now.  
He was getting extremely bored, normally he had his minions to keep him company, or more accurately for them to entertain him or for him to kill, but he had ordered them to leave, he wanted to be alone with Rachel when she finally decided to wake up.

That was nearly three hours ago. The Joker looked down beside where he was sitting there was a small rock sitting on the dirty ground of his humble home glancing back at Rachel a smirk grew on his face. He picked the small rock up and launched it at her, aiming for somewhere in between her eyes, when it hit the target jolting Rachel awake The Joker couldn't help but jump up for joy.

"Fin-al-ly!! Raaachel you know sleeping that much is a sign of depression.. did you know that?" he said kneeling so he was eye level with a groggy Rachel.

Rachel frowned "….Sleeping that much is a sign of getting drugged by a killer clown"  
"Killer Clown? …well that is a new one…I'm not too sure what I think about the Killer part, the simple title of Killer seems so beneath me, I prefer the term Ahead-of-the-curve"  
Rachel rolled her eyes, taking in for the first time where she was. She looked around the room, it was filthy, exactly the type of place that she expected someone like The Joker to live in. It was dark with barely any light shining in the room, her eyes went back to the Joker's face, he was looking at her with fascination, it filled her with dread, and made her stomach sick with fear.  
"What do you want with me?" she said forcing her voice to be strong and confident despite her fear.  
"Can't friends just abduct each other to spend some quality time with…..each..other?" The Joker said gesturing to himself.  
"Friend…? do you even have any friends .. do you even understand the meaning of friends?" Rachel said raising her eyebrows, how could someone like him have friends anyway.  
The Joker's face went blank before he let out a chuckle, it send shivers down her spine.  
" I have friends , I have many friends here let me introduce you to one" he reached into the pocket of his coat pulling out a knife that Rachel recognized  
"ahhh, here…we…go, here is my bestest friend!... Rachel I think you know each other" he said leaning over he placed the blade against her cheek giving Rachel a sense of déjà vu , except only this time they were much closer, she could feel his breath on her face, they were sitting in a dark room alone for some odd reason Rachel found it much more intimate, and much more terrifying, there would be no Batman to save her now, one swish of that knife and it would be all over for her.

He ran the blade down her cheek, not hard enough to pierce the skin but hard enough to give her the shakes. She sighed "Just do it" she whispered staring into his bottomless eyes  
"Do what?" he asked  
"just hurry up and kill me, get it over with, you'll kill me eventually, and I'm not telling you anything that you want to know, you can't threaten me with anything, so you might as well just kill me"  
The Joker burst into laughter, cackling so much she was sure tears were forming in his eyes.  


"Kill you!... you think HA ha ha oooh Beautiful.. you really, you, your beautiful" he said wiping the wetness from his eyes still chuckling he managed to rasp out "Why… would I.. want to kill you? You see if I killed you, there would be nothing to lure your precious Knight…s in shining armour…s to the mouse trap" he said gesturing to dark room they were currently inhabiting.  
Rachel let out a chuckle too which surprised her, and the Joker because he stopped laughing  
"…except maybe blind hatred?" she said chuckles turning into fits of laughter. "you think my.. 'knights' as you called them wouldn't come to find you if I was dead, in fact that might make them more motivated to…. Avenge me?.. and just who do you mean by my precious Knights?"  
The Joker smiled "oh don't act like you don't know!... its soooooo obvious, its widely known you and Harvey Dent are an item… but The Batman, hehah! Its obvious that you too are…not simply working together to send all the Scum of Gotham behind bars? Oh no no no…." he shook his head "he was quick to throw himself out of that building for you …wasn't he?... so who is the man behind that mask"?

Rachel didn't answer and The Joker pressed the blade of the knife to her lips.  
"hmm?" he said running the blade across her lips, Rachel gasped as she felt the tip of the blade nick her lip making small droplets of blood run down her chin and into her mouth, she could taste the warm metallic taste on her tongue.

"oops" The Joker said running the pads of his fingers across her lips wiping the blood away and smearing it across the skin of her cheek into a smile to match his own.  
Rachel felt her breathing change it only increased further when The Joker took his finger away from her lips and brought it up to his own, he smirked as he put the finger in his mouth sucking the blood off the digit.

Rachel knew that it was extremely wrong, dirty and many other types of messed up but seeing The Joker suck her blood of his finger may be the most erotic thing she had ever seen.  
"mmm woooow-A!" The Joker said after licking his finger clean "That..was deeelicious". He turned his head slightly to the side as if admiring his work on her face he nodded

"Yeah, I like it, a smile looks good on you, you should think of making it permanent…. Like mine" he said gesturing to his own scars with the knife.

The Joker burst out into a manical laughter, the look on her face, she looked shocked and scared and…aroused? Aheheh hhehah!! He stood up from his position on the floor and wiped the dust from his pants, sighing dramatically.

"Well, this was fun and all, but I have some busy-ness to do , so I must go" he said grinning from ear to ear and it shocked Rachel to realize that he looked some what like a little boy on Christmas morning who just received the present he'd been asking for, a deranged little boy but a little boy none the less.  
Realizing that he was in fact leaving burst her bubble  
"what am I supposed to do?" she said "how long are you going to leave me here?" The Joker stopped as he reached the door and turned around

"I don't know for the first question… believe me I've tried finding things to do , you'll be bored to death…. There is nothing to do in here… so boring it might actually kill you… but don't die! That's bad I need you aliivve! For the second one, ... I don't know either, until I get bored and return for another chat" he said turning towards the door once more

"How long am I going to be stuck in this place.. When can I go?" Rachel said getting extremely frustrated and upset, 'I just want to go home to Harvey' her inner voice said.  
The Joker shrugged 'however long it takes for Batsy and the white Knight to find you…. " The Joker laughed as he opened the door and left leaving Rachel alone in the dark room with her hands and feet tied together. She could feel her blood drying on her face making it itch slightly. She closed her eyes reliving the feeling of the Joker smearing her own blood on her cheeks, she felt sick inside, but an odd feeling somewhat close to adrenalin was creeping in just waiting to get out. She couldn't understand it, this was perhaps the most insane thing that had ever happened to her. Rachel felt scared, scared of the things that was beginning to brew within her.

She looked around desperate to find anything that could help her get these ropes off her wrists and ankles they were extremely uncomfortable and had already started to rub her skin raw. When she realized there was nothing she couldn't help but let out a yell of frustration "Stupid evil clown" she muttered angrily to herself.

_hehee... oooh sexual tension much. i thought it would really... interesting to use blood to fuel the sexual tension... sick disturbing but still...unsusually alluring.. which is what Rachel is thinkin too.  
I'll try and upload the next chapters as sooon as possible.  
you know what to do readers...  
want more... review review review!!  
_


	3. Chapter 3 Chaos

_Hello, dear readers, Thank you for you kind words in the reviews and thank you for the advice and..er stuff :)  
Here is a new chapter, that surprisingly for its length took me for ever to write, The Joker and Rachel are being extremely difficult for me. sighs oh well.  
anyways thats about all i have to say :)  
_

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**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter three : Chaos

Rachel sighed dramatically for the hundredth time. Well, if anything the Joker said that made sense or was right about during their little 'bonding' time it was the fact that she would be bored.  
'So boring it might actually kill you' he said, Rachel scoffed, that was for sure. Of course it didn't help that she could barely move and the ropes were really starting piss her off.

She wiggled her hands, desperate to try and loosen the ropes up enough for her to slip her hands through, "godamn it!" she yelled, frustrated. It was no use, The Joker had tied them too tight, probably knowing that she would try just about anything to get free.

Finally giving up, Rachel stopped struggling. There was nothing that she could do anyway… she just had to sit tight and wait for The Joker to return or for Bruce to come to her rescue, once again.  
Was this what she was? The typical damsel in distress, the young defenseless woman who always got kidnapped by the crazed loonies anytime her back was turned, who was weak and couldn't fight anyone off. Was this who Rachel Dawes really was… a scared little girl?

Rachel could feel tears of anger, frustration and fear began to build in her eyes, she sniffed, refusing to let them fall, but it didn't work.  
The tears made their way down her cheeks and she couldn't wipe them away like she would normally do.  
It wasn't as if anyone could see her showing this emotion anyway so why did she care? She thought angrily.  
'because it means The Joker got to you' Her inner voice said mockingly.  
''Shut…up''she muttered to herself.  
'Oh great… .now I'm talking to myself' she thought nearly laughing out loud.

Rachel looked around the room, she felt as though she had been in there for so long that the whole darkness of the room was almost normal. She was well and truly alone, and that thought struck a chord deep within her, she was all by herself. Rachel suddenly felt claustrophobic and a sob worked its way up her throat echoing into the vast emptiness of the room. She couldn't believe she was actually thinking this but she would rather that The Joker was still with her, at least then she had something to distract her from just how alone she really was.

She closed her eyes and imagined that she was with Harvey. That he had his arms around her, protecting her and keeping her warm from what ever horrible things that were going on the world. She wondered if she'd still be where she is now if she'd just said yes at the party, if she did would she of been at 

Harvey's apartment or would Harvey had been at hers, if so would the Joker of still taken her for his sick little plan?

So many thoughts were running through her head she felt like she wanted to pull her hair out, she would if she could of course but seeing as her hands were currently tied up it was a little impossible.  
She wondered if they were all looking for her. Bruce, Harvey, Gordon. If they did find her, they'd done exactly what The Joker wanted them too, what was he planning to do? To kill them? It was all getting so confusing.

Her thoughts were interrupted when she heard the door open and saw the Joker walk in. Her eyebrows rose when she saw he was wearing a glittery top hat.

"Hellooo Beautiful" he said sauntering over to her in what she guessed was supposed to be his 'seductive' walk. She couldn't help but roll her eyes, he was trying this again? It was even more hard to take seriously when he was wearing that ridiculous looking hat.

"Let me go!" she said trying to muster up enough anger in her voice to at least try and sound like she had authority.  
The Joker chuckled "Oh I love it when you get all feisty!".

Rachel sighed, looked like it was time for some compromise. "can you at least untie my hands and feet?".  
The Joker looked like he was considering it and nodded

"Ooo-kay, but you have to promise not to run away" he said pointing his finger at her much in the same way a parent would when scolding a child.  
"Fine.." Rachel muttered.  
The Joker got his knife out from his coat and went on to cut the ropes around her wrists and ankles.  
As he bent over and was cutting the ropes on her ankles his eyes flickered to her face then flickered to the door that she was currently eyeing, a small knowing smile flittering his red cracked lips.

'ohhh…we have a runnerrr!' he thought to himself.

Rachel prepared herself, she'd been thinking about this earlier in the day, when The Joker returned asked to have hands and feet free, while Joker is releasing said feet, will kick in balls or injure other body part and run like she'd never ran before.  
He was bent over in front of her cutting through the ropes on her ankles; she just had to wait for the opportune moment.

The Joker was taking his time on cutting the ropes on her ankles, she was planning to run away, hahahah HA! Did she really think so little of him to think that he'd simply let her run out of the room?  
Just as he was thinking this Rachel lept up and kicked him in the crotch knocking him to the ground, pain radiated through his throbbing crotch, The Joker groaned in pain and let out an amused chuckle at the same time.  


Rachel made a run for the door, this was it, she was nearly there! She thought, she was going to make it.

The next thing she knew the room was suddenly turning upside down, the ground was being pulled from her feet. The Joker had grabbed hold of her ankle pulling her to ground with him.

The Joker jumped up and threw himself on her, holding her to the floor, he straddled her making sure that there was no way for to kick him again, his crotch still hurt from the first blow it needed to recover a bit before he could subject himself to it again.

Rachel looked up at The Joker's face laughing down at her, eyes twinkling in amusement, he had her pinned to the ground with no hope of escaping.

"ooh Rachel, Rachel, we had a promise re-mem-ber!" He said drawing out the syllables of all the words, but he was not talking normally Rachel noticed his voice had lowered, making him sound even more menacing and to Rachel's horror more hypnotic and …seductive?  
"Yeah, well doesn't mean I wasn't going to try!" she spat angrily.  
The Joker let out a laugh  
"OH… yeaah did I not tell you how much I love a feisty girl who can kick some ass, my ass to be precise, its ….such…….a..turn on … wouldn't you say….?" he said lowering his face even more so his nose touched hers.

Rachel inwardly cringed, there was no way she could turn her face, he already had her pinned to the ground without anywhere to go and now his face was so close she could see the different colours of his eyes.  
Rachel looked into those eyes and started to feel lost in them, they were so deep, and hollow and had completely drawn her in, it was frightening.

With his face still extremely close to hers The Joker lifted his fingers to the dried blood that he'd left on her cheeks, running his fingers across the skin, making Rachel close her eyes, but to his absolute amusement not completely from disgust.  
"Say, tell me, Miss Dawes, is it the feeling of being dominated by another that's such a turn on?" he said, fingers travelling down the skin of her chin to hollow of her neck, "or… is it the feelings involved, the absolute hatred, that normally…comes…with..ass kicking?"  
"hmm?" The Joker hummed fingers coming to the skin of her breasts.

Rachel opened her eyes, okay this was going too far now, how much further was he planning on taking this, Rachel felt fear in the pit of her stomach and her heart beating in her chest so fast she was sure she would choke on it.  
before she could even think the words were already coming out of her mouth.  
"I don't hate you" she whispered. "Just…. What you are, what you stand for"  


"Whaaat… I stand for. I see that being Anarchy, chaos etc etc, I hate to tell you this sweet pea…. Really I do but I am those things. I am Anarchy; I am an agent of Chaos…." He said voice dropping even lower, if possible becoming so dark that Rachel felt her heart stop beating all together. She could of sworn that the colour of his eyes turned black.

There were no more words to say between the two of them, Rachel felt like if she tried saying anything it would probably come out in a terrified squeak.  
Before Rachel could think any more she was being pulled by The Joker to her feet.  
The Joker smiled evilly "So… Rachel care of some_ ass kicking_" he said licking his lips.  
Rachel frowned feeling slightly sick in her stomach  
"actually, I take that back. I _do_ hate you".  
The Joker did nothing but laugh.

Rachel sat back down on the floor, her legs shaking too much for her to even contemplate standing for much longer. The Joker turned around and sat down on the other side of the room.  
Rachel glanced back at the Joker, once again eyes going to the hat on his head.  
"Whats with the hat?" she asked.

The Jokers eyes widened, "What hat?"  
"the one on your head." Rachel said like it was the most obvious thing in the world.  
The Joker realized what she was talking about "Ahhhhh.." he said taking the hat from his head and spinning it around on his finger "a souvenir …. From…this……kind…man… I met… today"  
"….a man you killed?" Rachel said  
"ah..yeah" The Joker said nodding.  
"you make me sick" Rachel said turning away from the Joker in disgust.  
"….oh Raaachel you didn't seem so sickened five minutes…..ago" The Joker said in sing song.  
Rachel opened her mouth to retort but closed it again when she realized she had no retort for that.

There was nothing but silence among the room for a while after that. Rachel, to tired, to stressed, to sickened to bother to say anything and The Joker seeming quite happy to sit in silence observing her with his gaze.  
The silence was broken when Rachel heard his amused voice again

"SO…… are you bored?" he said  
Rachel scoffed "To death"  
The Joker chuckled "I told you..."


	4. Chapter 4 Soul

_Hello again, here we are for another ... installment.  
thank you to everyone who did review, I appreciate that you took the time, it certainly does motivate me to write more.  
Personally, I do not know what I feel about this chapter. To me, I feel that its a bit rushed.  
I know that my punctuation...ain't too great XD but hopefully it will get better.  
anyway, enjoy chapter... and Review Review Review!! _

disclaimer : if i owned Batman and friends would I be writing Fanfictions...uh no.

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter four - Soul

The Joker had spent the entire afternoon in her company, sitting in the same position on the other side of the room to her. No matter how hard Rachel tried her gaze always flickered back to him.

It seemed like he had the attention span of a 4 year old. He would be playing with his knife, running the pads of his fingers along the blade like it somehow comforted or deeply amused him to be so close to something so sharp, the next time she looked at him he was reaching into his pocket pulling out a deck of cards.

Rachel watched him out of the corner of her eye, he was doing some impressive card tricks and she heard him mutter a curse when he messed one up sending cards flying everywhere.

The next time she risked a peak at him he was staring at her with a sadistic grin on his face like he knew something that she didn't know. Rachel couldn't handle his gaze, it was bothering her immensely.  
It was as if he was looking into her soul trying to pick out all the bad things she'd done in her life, all her sins. It was as if he was looking for the monster, the villain in her.

Rachel really didn't want to say another thing to this man sitting across from her, but nature was calling, she felt her bladder protest at the thought of holding on for too much longer.

'This is going to be an awkward conversation' she thought cringing to herself.

She cleared her throat, grabbing his attention. "I…need to go to the bathroom" she said in a quiet voice.  
"Oooookay" The Joker said looking at her like she'd just sprouted a second head.

Rachel blinked unsure about what to say next.

"Well… go on then" he said gesturing to the door behind her that she guessed led to the bathroom.

"Are you going to go or not, because frankly I don't fancy cleaning Ur-ine from myyy clean floor" The Joker said pointing to the floor.

Rachel looked at the floor and cocked an eyebrow, 'he calls _this_ a clean floor'.

The floor looked like it hadn't been cleaned in weeks, months even. In fact Rachel was starting to wonder if The Joker owned this place or was simply squatting. The place looked as though it was ready to be bull-dozed

"..You're just going to let me go to the bathroom by myself?" Rachel said surprise evident in her voice.

"..Would you like me to go with you...Raaachel, you're a big girl now; I think you can handle it! I believe in you Rachel Dawes!" he said mockingly. "Of course…. I would...Not mind … ac-company-ing you to Said bathroom".

Rachel rolled her eyes, typical that he'd make a joke out of something as simple as this.  
"Is everything a joke to you?" she said frustration leaking into her voice.

A sinister giggle echoed through the room  
"They do call me… The _Joker_… so yes, my life is full of Jokes".

Rachel scoffed.  
"Aww… Why so serious Rachel? You really ought to smile more" The Joker said, grin widening.  
"You know……they say smiling is good for the soul".

"Its not done you any favours" Rachel said looking into The Jokers eyes, the eyes she'd always been frightened of. The more she thought about it the more she realized his eyes scared her because she saw nothing in them, they were so empty…empty and soulless.

"They also say the eyes are like window into a person's soul, and you know what _Joker_ when I look into your eyes……. I

don't see anything. So tell me…what killed your soul? Was it the same reason you got those scars... Did daddy beat you up as child...? Or was it mommy..." Rachel couldn't get another word out, for The Joker had jumped up, grabbing fistfuls of her matted hair pulling her to her feet.

Rachel yelled out in surprise and pain as she felt herself getting pulled to her feet from her hair.  
She was faced with the Joker but what surprised her and shocked her most was the look in his eyes, those normally empty eyes suddenly brimming with hidden emotions, the main emotion radiated from him was anger an anger so deep and so consuming that Rachel felt herself shaking.

"Oh…Beautiful your shaking….are you scared?" he said, Glasgow smile widening.

Rachel was scared, so scared that she couldn't respond, she felt her breath quicken, her heart rate increase and her insides jumble.

Bringing his hand to the back of her head, he brought her head closer to his,  
"What was it you said… ahh yesss…. My eyes... Do they scare you…? Or is it my scars?"

Rachel whimpered as The Joker yanked on her hair making pain radiate through her again, she could feel a sob working its way up her throat but she refused to let him know how much he was affecting her.

"You see… Rachel, I….was a handsome young man, you may not see it now but I was, and I had this brother. He was alwaaaays jealous of little ol' me. So jealous that one day after having just one to many girls turn him down…… he…. lost… his mind."

The Joker reached into his pocked pulling out his knife again, pressing it to Rachel's lips.  
"Soo…that night when I came home with this girl….beautiful….. Like you... He jumped me!. Get this. .he told me… he said… you need to smile more...broth-err….with the girl watching, he shoved the blade in my mouth cutting my tongue open in the process" The Joker put the blade in Rachel's mouth so far it made her gag and taste her own blood.

"I start… choking on my own blood, the girl……she's screaming…begging him to stop…." The Joker was now almost growling out the words, twisting the knife in Rachel's mouth cutting open her gums.

Rachel felt the tears that she had been holding back run down her cheeks,  
"Stop..." she managed to sob out despite the blade in her mouth.

"…Yeah… like that…. Anyway... He twists the blade a little more and I can feel him cutting my mouth open, he says….. Girls love a smile… lets put a smile on that face!" The Joker leaned in even further if it was even possible.

"And you know what the funny thing is…..Rachel…. girls won't even look at me now!"

The Joker's eyes bored into hers as he slowly removed the knife from her mouth still holding her head to his.

"...There's nothing stronger than a brothers love am I right Miss Dawes?" he nearly whispered and with that he shoved the sobbing girl into the bathroom door, turning and walking away.

Rachel opened the door and slammed it shut behind her clutching her chest and sobbing near hysterically, spluttering she walked over to the sink spitting the blood from her mouth into the basin.

She felt like her heart was going to explode from the pace it was pumping; she clutched her stomach, nausea overwhelming her. She groaned, bending over clutching the sides of the sink until her knuckles turned white.

It was only then that she realized that she still needed to use the toilet, with shaking legs that threatened to give out on her at any moment she made her way to the toilet.

After she had finished she made her way over to the sink, washing her hands she slowly raised her head to take a look at her self in the mirror and winced. She looked awful.

Her hair looked like a bird had decided to make it its home, her eyes were red and slightly puffy from crying, her mouth was dried and cracked and she still had her own blood smeared on her cheeks.

She was a mess, Rachel couldn't help but wonder what Harvey would think seeing her this way, and would he be disgusted? She looked at her mouth again, really taking in the way her blood was smeared into a smile. It was like her reflection was laughing at her, mocking her.

Looking at her laughing reflection she felt a pull in her stomach, the way her reflection was looking at her, it reminded her of the way The Joker looked her, the way he made her feel.

Rachel felt her breath quicken again, how could this man…if you could even call him that have this kind of affect on her it was as if he had crawled his way inside her, making his way under her skin. Constantly laughing at her.

Rachel couldn't stand it anymore she turned on the tap, wetting her hands; she started scrubbing at the dried blood on her cheeks, desperate to erase that mocking smile.  
She could feel her fingers tremble as she nearly rubbed her skin raw, leaving red finger nail marks on her pale skin.

Once all the blood was gone, she felt her legs crumple beneath her making her collapse to the cold tiled floor of the bathroom.

The blood was gone, yet she still felt like The Joker was laughing at her, crawling his way inside her slowly but surely and burying himself within her where he'd lay forever.

Rachel shivered and wrapped her arms around herself desperate to stop herself from shaking; she was cold, and alone. She felt tears threaten to fall again, she couldn't take this anymore.  
She wanted to go home.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The Joker paced back and forth around the room, feeling his fists clench and unclench, this was getting too much. That girl... That annoying, insufferable…yet intriguing girl was going to be the death of him.

How much longer could this take, how much longer could he have this Woman around without making him crazy…..crazier.

He'd wish Batsy would hurry up and fly to his damsel's rescue already.  
Plans were so frustrating, this was why he always stuck to spontaneous acts of anarchy, they never disappoint, soon as you start planning something everything goes to crap.

The Joker let out a yell of frustration punching the wall with his fist, he felt pain ripple through his knuckles, spreading through his hand and radiating up his arm. He could feel the skin of his knuckles breaking and his bones bruising. Crying out somewhere between pain and pleasure he laughed hysterically.

* * *

_here we go again  
like i've said before  
I'm up for some constructive critiscism :) i post here to get better.  
soo what do you think... about where the story's going.  
like it... yes .. no  
I'd love to find out people's opinions  
so... tell me your opinion when you click that button! thats right people.  
review! _


	5. Chapter 5 Water

_Hi again. For those who have given this story a chance and have decided read it, I thank you! :) and for those who've taken the time to review... i thank you twice!!. I admit i struggled with this chapter a bit. but hopefully its not to crap-awful. i'll go into details at the bottom... read first!  
disclaimer : i do not own it. simple as fried cheese... but is fried cheese simple? _

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter five : Water

Rachel saw light flicker as her eyes slowly fluttered open with blurry vision and a throbbing head.  
Rachel groaned as she slowly sat up feeling her muscles ache slightly with the strain of the position she had slept in. She looked around noticing that she was still in the bathroom. She guessed that she'd fallen asleep on the bathroom floor, finally exhausted by all that had happened.

Her head felt as though it had been run over with a truck, or at least been wacked over the head a few times with a baseball bat, she took a deep breath trying to stop the room from spinning.

Rachel looked towards the door, the door that would lead to where the Joker might be, that was unless he had gone off to wreak some more havoc on Gotham.

Did she really want to face him right now? Her stomach certainly protested as butterflies fluttered in the pit of her stomach actually they were more like elephants with wings.

She winced as she bit her lip, remembering the cut she received from the tip of The Joker's knife, her mouth also throbbed and she could trace the lines of the cuts made along her gums. Her whole mouth felt as though it had been put through a meat grinder.

When she finally found enough courage to walk over to the door she hesitated when her hand grasped the door knob. What if he was waiting for her? Ready to take out his anger on her again and then laugh while doing it.

Rachel wasn't stupid, she knew what she said certainly struck a chord within him, she saw it in his eyes, the way they suddenly changed. It was as if someone had come along and flipped a switch in his brain.  
Or opening a door that he kept locked; along with all those memories of …what ever happened to him to make him the way he was.

She just had to remember to keep her big mouth shut! Note to self, do not bring up Joker's past. Will receive sharp things in face.

Rachel shuddered remembering having that knife twisting in her mouth as The Joker told her the story of his scars, how his brother had done it to him in a fit of jealous rage, ……… but wait. Rachel's eyebrows knitted together as she recounted the horrifying story again in her mind.

At the fundraiser, he told her a completely different story, he said that he did it to himself…for his wife. How could she have not remembered that, though then again she was a little preoccupied with having her mouth cut open. Why would he tell two different stories?

'Why does The Joker do anything' she told herself 'you can't trust anything he says he's probably lying

About everything'

Taking a deep breath, Rachel opened the door and stepped into the dark room. She looked around, the room was empty. There was no sign of The Joker, she was alone again. Oh hooray.

That was when it caught her eye, there laying on the dusty floor was a piece of paper. Picking it up she saw slightly messy writing scrawled on it.  
_  
Rachel Dawes, I'm assuming you don't wish to spend the rest of your time here at the house of Joker in your nighty nights. … as much as they suit you.  
Look on the chair.  
J_

Rachel looked down at the clothes that she was currently wearing, her fairly flimsy night gown that she had worn to bed the night The Joker kidnapped her. It was a black lacy silk with a low cut front, finishing above the knee.

'The one night I decide to wear my sexy PJ's I get kidnapped by a homicidal clown'. She thought automatically covering her chest.

He'd been close to her many times since she'd been there, that time where he'd been literally lying on top of her sprang to mind, hands nearly groping her, she was too occupied with the slightly disturbing yet oddly exhilarating feeling of his skin on hers to notice what she was wearing.

Walking over to the chair she picked up the items that The Joker or minions had laid out for her.  
They were simple black pants and a green and purple striped shirt. 'Purple and Green?' she thought nearly laughing out loud '….typical' she said picking up the items of clothing.

When she walked back into the bathroom to changed she realized for the first time that there was a shower in there, oh the thought of having a warm shower nearly made Rachel melt right there.

Letting her night gown fall to the ground she stepped into the shower turning it on. She'd decided to leave her underwear on, she may be alone now but it wasn't like The Joker or one of his goons couldn't just walk in when ever they felt like, she'd rather not have them see her in all her glory.

Rachel felt her eyes close as the hot water soothed her sore muscles, getting rid of all the tension built up during her stay at '_The House of Joker_'. It was like the water was washing everything away and with her eyes closed she could imagine that she was in her shower at home, or in Harvey's apartment.

She would have stayed at his house for the night, like they sometimes did, sleep over's Harvey called them. Rachel smiled… she'd been to sleep over's when she was a child of course none of them quite like the ones she spent at Harvey's or vice versa.  
She would sleep in of course, as it was their day off, so after many wonderful hours of blissful sleep she would stumble her way into his bathroom and into his shower, feeling the water spread warmth through her.  
Then she'd feel his arms slide around her waist encasing her in his arms. God she could even feel his arms around her now………….  
"Wow…. I like this little number _much _better than the other one" a familiar voice chuckled into her ear.

Rachel spun around so fast she nearly slipped on the wet tiled floor. She became face to face with a slightly damp and very amused Joker.

He was blocking her exit, she had no where to go, and he was loving it.  
"get out of my way, let me past" Rachel said keeping her head held high with confidence.

"Oh Why… do you want to leave…when we're having soo much fun here" The Joker said leering at her exposed flesh.

Rachel felt the colour rise in her cheeks, feeling slight embarrassment overcome her.  
The Joker took a step towards her making her take a step back until she was fully under the spray of water.  
"…You going to get wet" Rachel whispered lamely, unable to find anything more intellectual to say.

The Joker's smile widened as the droplets of water dropped onto his face leaving trails of smudged makeup down his face.  
"Well, you're already having a shower; I might as well join you. Saves water, do you have any idea how expensive water bills are these days?"

The Joker had backed her up against the wall of the shower, pressing his body against hers. With laughing eyes he lifted his fingers to the droplets of water running down her neck to her chest.

"Rachel…. Water is fascinating…don't you think" He said trailing his fingers down the wet flesh leaving a trail of goose bumps. "The Human body…..is made from it. Did you know that…. You. Are 70 per-cent water yet…here you are…flesh…blood." His fingers trailed from the cut on her lip to her ribs "and…bones".

Rachel leaned her head back against the wall unable to find the strength to move. "70 per-cent water….and you can still drown" he said, his face was so close to hers that his lips nearly touched hers.

"Why are you doing this?" Rachel whispered.

"Because I like games…. And that's what this is…. a game, and besides Miss Dawes……. Its not like you're stopping me …" The Joker said, scarred lips trailing across her cheek.  
Rachel felt her knees quiver, her stomach jumbling so much it felt like something was alive inside.

Tears threaten to fall from her eyes as she processed his words, she wasn't stopping him! Why was she letting him do this?  
'Because you like it' a voice that sounded disturbingly like The Joker's echoed in her head.

'No I don't….. That's sick' she told herself. She repeated it to herself like a mantra, this is sick, this is sick….. Oh my god this is so sick. She heard herself gasp as The Joker bit the skin of her ear making her shiver despite the warmth of the water.  
Lips touching the shell of her ear he chuckled "Say….What would Harvey think?"

Before Rachel could even react The Joker had disappeared his manic laugh echoing in the room, the only trace that he'd even been there.  
Rachel closed her eyes trying to steady her breathing.

All she wanted…was a shower and he had to ruin that too, never mind the fact that he'd abducted her from her own apartment, drugged her, tied her up, held her hostage, cut her, abused her and laughed while doing all of it but now he'd turned it all into one big game.

Rachel stood straight up turning off the tap and stepping out of the shower gathering the clothes.  
If a game was what he wanted….a game was what she'd give him.

* * *

_cringes ... hides in corner i knoww!! i know its crap-tastic dont hit me!.  
I can explain I swear!. okay i had this Dance practice thing after school. yeah for the school Presentation ball we have to learn all these dances with our partners. like the waltz the school waltz etc ... that made me exhausted.. for one thing i cannot dance at all! so when i finally got home i had to do homework... after that I was a soo tired that when I finally started writing this my mind was kind of...gone.  
Plus...i feel the beginnings of a serious case of Writers Block coming on sobs  
anyway despite its crappiness i hope some of you at least liked aspects of it.  
if so Review Review Review :) it would make me feel better. _


	6. Chapter 6 Games

_Hi!! wow, Thankyou peoples for reviewing on the last chapter and making me feel soo much better. it really made me feel much better about a chapter that i thought was...well... .below mediocre XD  
I'm feeling a little more satisfied with this chapter so i hope you like it as well :)  
Disclaimer : I am not the owner of the characters of Batman, they all belong to DC Comics and friends. _

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME **

Chapter six - Games

_I'm only laughing on the outside  
My smile is just skin deep  
If you could see inside I'm really crying  
You might join me for a weep._  
- The Joker

The Joker took off his now wet coat leaving it on the chair, still chuckling over Rachel's face when he surprised her in the shower.

Haaha! She looked as though she didn't know weather to kick him in the balls or kiss him; personally he wouldn't have minded either.  
It wasn't like he could really blame her, he was pretty irresistible if he did say so himself.

He returned to his spot on the floor, leaning against the wall on the other side of the room to the bathroom door, 'when she finally decides to come out, I'll be the first thing she see's ha!' he thought to himself.

Just as he was saying this, the bathroom door slowly started to open, revealing a very pissed off looking Rachel Dawes.  
Her hair was still wet and still slightly tangled but other than that it seemed the shower, however interrupted it was had done her a world of good.

The Joker couldn't help but grin at the look on her face, her lips were pursed and her eyes sending daggers at him.

Ahhh the hatred in her eyes, however underlined with many other emotions, it thrilled him!

Looking down at the clothes she now wore, the clothes he left for her to put on he couldn't help but laugh  
"Well, would you look at that…..we match"

Rachel looked down at the clothes she was wearing, they were slightly big for but still fit her comfortably, the colours however made her cringe.

"And I used to be such a fan of green and purple" she sighed.

"What can I say…. My favourite".

For the first time Rachel took notice of what he was wearing, he looked different without that coat that always looked as though it was swallowing him. He didn't look as scrawny for one thing.  
The shirt and vest looked perfectly tailored to fit his body. He looked good…very good. She mentally scolded herself, 'stop it, not after everything he's done to you'  


Rachel couldn't help but flush red in embarrassment when her thoughts were interrupted by the Jokers amused voice.

"Admiring my assets Miss Dawes?"

"…No… I was admiring your cheap suit" she said smirking slightly instantly feeling laughter bubble under the surface at the Jokers offended expression.

"It was not cheap…custom made act-u-ally...What do you take me for?" he said brushing all the crinkles out of his suit admiringly.

Rachel couldn't help but smile a little at that, this man, this crazy insane man who kills people gets offended when his hostage calls his clothes cheap? How...Fascinating.

Rachel sat in her spot across from her captor.  
"How about a game Joker?" she said confidently.

The Joker looked at her surprised by her sudden eagerness to talk to him.

"A game……. Not so serious now are we, well your coming along nicely…..what kind of a game do you have in mind?" he said licking his lips, raising his eyebrows seductively.

Rachel rolled her eyes "I was thinking a game…to get to know each other better….. Like 20 questions"  
If Rachel wanted to know things about him, she figured the only way to do it was to think like him, turn it into a game.

"Alriiight…" The Joker said clapping his hands "but… before we start, we should lay down some ruuules"

Rachel frowned…rules for 20 questions? What rules could he possibly have for a simple game like 20 questions?  
"Okay…like what?" Rachel said.

"well…..Rachel I'm not a big fan of rules, they are created by a bunch of no-brain twitters who don't know how to have fun, so there will only be one rule ooo-kay".  
Rachel nodded.

"The first and only rule is….There are no rules…….. Anything goes… but you have to answer all the questions" he said.  
"Okay" Rachel said, but she already felt her heart rate increase, where to start, she had so many questions that she wanted to ask him…. .But did she really want to know the answers?

"I'll go first" The Joker said "Do you know who Batman is..?"  
Rachel gulped... Oh dear

"Yes" she said not breaking eye contact.

"In-ter-es-ting…. I thought as much".

"My turn…" Rachel said her nerves evident due to the slight quiver in her voice "…Why do you wear make up?" Rachel held her breath almost dreading what would come next, after all last time she asked questions he shoved a blade in her mouth.

"Why do you?" he asked gesturing to her, Rachel opened her mouth to say something but closed it again when she couldn't think of anything.

"…you still didn't answer my question" she said.  
"I like the way it brings out my eyes" he said mockingly.

Rachel scoffed, frustration crawling into her body, he was so annoying!

"Stop it, be serious!" she grounded out through gritted teeth.

"Raaachel, you've been in my company for a little while now, it does not take long to understand, that I……am never serious" he said giggling insanely making Rachel feel all the more annoyed.

"My turn" he began before Rachel could say anything else.  
"But-"The Joker had cut her off "…Rachel it's my turn...Play fair" he said looking mock offended.

"How well do you know the Batman….how far would he go to save you?" The Joker said, his voice sending eerie shivers down Rachel's spine.

"That was two questions" she said trying to change the subject.

"Well just answer me this then, would he be doing all he can do to find you?"

Rachel couldn't think of any way out of this question "….yes" she whispered.  
The Joker blinked, leaning forward pressing a hand to the back of his ear "I'm sorry…. I didn't hear that what?"

"Yes….. Batman….would be doing anything he could to find me" Rachel said louder this time.

"Hmmm" The Joker nodded his head "…verrry in-ter-es-ting...does Handsome Harvey know about his little squeeze and Gotham's Vigilante?"

Rachel blinked "I don't know what you're talking about…. And it's my turn"

The Joker smirked "…that it is, take your turn beautiful"

Rachel took a deep breath knowing that she was really skating on thin ice with this question but The Joker said everything was a game and she wanted to play.  
"…What's your real name?" she said looking deep into the depths of his eyes waiting for them to turn black.

"Steve" he said without missing a beat, Rachel blinked… Steve?

Their eye contact was not broken but neither said anything, Rachel looked at him waiting for something in his eyes to change, but nothing did, just the same emptiness as they always were.

"You're lying….." She said still not breaking eye-contact.

The Joker's ever present smile faltered again before he stood up walking towards the door  
"I have some business to attend to Miss Dawes, please excuse me, but chaos cannot be late"

Rachel stood up quickly, not letting him get out of answering the question so quickly, two could play at this game.

"Well, I guess I touched a nerve didn't I…… what's wrong _Joker _cat got your tongue?" once again before Rachel could even react, The Joker had his hands around her throat backing her against the wall.

"..Oh Raaachel, and you say _I'm_ the crazy one…..you've been held hostage by a rr_raving psychopath_ who kills people for laughs and you ……question….and talk back to him… I got to tell you kid, you've got balls"

The Joker lowered one of his hands to the inside of her thigh, gently caressing it through her trousers.  
Rachel bit her lip to keep from moaning as The Joker's fingers reached the apex of her thighs  
"Figuratively speaking…..of course" he growled into her ear.

Rachel felt her breathing quicken, it couldn't be helped not when his hands…were where they were.  
"I'm not afraid of you..." she said as The Joker licked a trail from her ear to her mouth.  
"...Oh really..? Then tell me…. Rachel... Why are you trembling?"

Rachel opened her mouth but nothing but a gasp escaped as she felt The Joker stroke her through her clothes.

The Joker laughed "what's this then, something other than fear…or perhaps… it's both…hmm? Fear and arousal mixed with blind hatred would serve for one wild session of….._ass kicking_"

The Joker pressed his scarred lips to hers before taking a step back giggling manically.

"Parting… is such sweet sorrow Miss Dawes" with that he left the room once more leaving Rachel standing there with a mixture of shock and confusion.

'What a waste of time that was' Rachel thought to herself as she sat back down on the dirty and dank floor of the room.

'And now he knows exactly what kind of effect he has on me' she thought mentally punching herself.

So much for turning the tables and getting in on the game. He was certainly winning that was for sure. Not only that but she didn't know anything more about him than she did before. Trying to get any kind of truth out of him was completely useless.

Yet she told him many useful things, for one thing he'd already guessed that there was more to her and Bruce's relationship than simply putting away criminals.

It was only an amount of time before he probably did some research into her past and came to his own conclusions about who exactly The Batman was.

This was all getting too much. Rachel buried her head in her hands, wishing to block everything out.

She sighed, wondering what Harvey was doing at this moment in time. Was he out searching for her, she hadn't been gone that long just under two days… or at least she thought. It felt as though she had been here forever locked inside this room as The Jokers own personal comedic show.

There had to be something more to him… there just had to be. What could have possibly happened to this man that could make someone turn into something like that?

It couldn't have been very nice that was for sure. Though he hardly showed any type of emotion except for amusement there was those small moments were Rachel saw that humanity within him, lying dormant.

Of course there was the time where she brought up his past, she felt the cuts in her mouth with her tongue, There was definitely no forgetting that.

She saw the change in his eyes. It was scary, yet almost comforting. Because it was proof that there was something else among all that emptiness in him.

Something within Rachel told her to keep going, to keep looking for those rare small moments where The Joker showed something other than hollowness. There had to be something there and she would find it.

Suddenly an uncomfortable growl entered her stomach. Rachel groaned clutching her abdomen. Right…. She'd been here for at least over a day now with no food. She felt as though her insides were sliced open… another couple of hours of boredom and hunger. Rachel sighed  
"Terrific" she muttered before burying her face in her hands again.

* * *

_alright... so things i feel are getting a little repetitive... joker comes... Rachel and Joker exchange witty dialogue... add some sexual tension Joker leaves right when things start getting a little steamy._

so i think i'm going to add some new dynamics in the next few chapters. I'm thinking i might add Harvey onto the scene... or something along those lines just to keep things interesting.  
of course.. there will still be The Joker/Rachel tension.. because we all love that XD

I hope you enjoyed it... and you know what to do click that button. you know you want to!


	7. Chapter 7 Lost

_oooh. wow im kind of shocked by how many people like this story :)  
I think some of you may have gotten the wrong idea when i said i was thinking of adding Harvey into it. I in no way meant as a love triangle thing... eugh. hehe i kind of just meant add him into the story.. of what he is doing while Rachel and The Joker make sexy time.. haha. like what him, Bruce... etc etc are doing to find Rachel. But im still not sure yet.  
so without further ado... i give you the next installment... its a bit short i know... eek but homework got the best of me today :)  
Disclaimer : me..? own .. .Batman haha! sighs i wish. _

_Also theres this fantastic Joker/Rachel video on youtube that really sets the tone of my whole fic. plus its just... incredible the way it was edited so please go watch this video :) CopiPan is amazing._

_ mx./watch?vq9AVsRD-hQ4 or just search for Joker/Rachel - Im alive it should come up.  
_

**MuffinsNMalice** -_ hah yeaaah i know i really do need to improve when it comes to punctuation, speling, sentence structure and all that jazz, hopefully through posting and all that i'll improve. thanks for the review though XD _

**Kendra Luehr - **h_ah. youR comment made me laugh. and that would of been hilarious if he asked her what colour panties she was wearing... :D damn i can never think of great material when it actually comes to writing the chapter harumph :( _

_THANKS TO EVERYONE WHO REVIEWED I WANT TO MARRY YOU ALL AND HAVE YOUR BABIES!! _

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

chapter seven : Lost

Rachel sighed for what seemed like the billionth time that day. There really was absolutely nothing to do in this crap-hole.  
Not to mention her hunger had reached beyond painful, and had turned into almost agonizing.  
It felt like everything within her now was just screaming for food.  
Glorious…food.

Rachel felt her stomach growl again, moaning she clutched at her stomach trying to relieve some of the pain.  
Her eyes flickered towards the door again, when would he be coming back?

The Joker had been gone for a few hours now, doing god knows what. She didn't like to think about that, all the horrible things that he was probably doing to Gotham while he wasn't with her.

It struck her as slightly off-putting that she only thought about what a monster he was when he wasn't with her, when he was it was as if she couldn't think logically.

Everything that she would normally find important was drowned out in her mind, replaced with him.  
Everything become slightly fuzzy when he was around; nothing else mattered except what was going on in the room.

What Rachel really hated was the loss of control she had when ever he touched her. It sickened her that he had that much power over her. In any other world she would not have allowed it, but there was something about the way he could…dominate her that was alluring….and kind of a turn on.

Rachel groaned, she was beginning to sound more and more like him, even quoting him inside her head. Was this what happened to hostages who spend too much time with the captors, they begin to act like them?

An odd image flashed in Rachel's mind of her in a not-so-cheap purple suite with clown makeup on her face, she couldn't help but laugh out loud at the image. It looked absolutely ridiculous, and on any normal person it would look ridiculous but The Joker was anything but normal and he somehow...managed to pull it off to an extent.

Her eyes scanned the room desperate for anything that would keep her mind off the hunger, and the disturbing thoughts of The Joker that were currently in her head.  
There on the other side of the room, in the corner, buried under dust and many other items that Rachel couldn't identify was a chest of draws.

Curiosity got the best of her and Rachel stood up, walking towards the draws interested as to what could be inside them.

She removed some of the items, sending dust particles into the air surrounding her, she removed old books that hadn't been opened in god knows how long, empty picture frames that had spider webs attached to them and a dusty, faded jewelry box..What would The Joker be doing with a jewelry box?

it only supported her theory more that this was not his house, the whole squatting idea seeming more and more likely.  
It was obvious that nobody had had anything to do with this piece of furniture for a long time, much like the rest of the room she was in.

She grasped the handle of the draw, pulling slightly harder than normal due to the stiffness of not being opened in so long.

The draws were filled with papers, some of them blank and some of them with scribbled out writing that Rachel couldn't read.

That was when she saw it. There hidden in the corner of the draw, slightly crinkled and torn at the edges was a photograph.  
Gently turning it over in her hand, the face of a young man stared back at her.

The man looked actually closer to a boy. He couldn't of been older than 17. But despite his youth, the face staring back at her was a beautiful one.

Rachel couldn't help but smile at the beautiful boy in the photograph.  
There was definitely something cheeky about this boy that seemed so familiar.

Frowning, she looked closer at the photograph, oh yes there was definitely something familiar about the picture.  
Her heart nearly stopped,

She recognized that lopsided smirk, and she recognized the twinkle in his eye that held so much amusement.

"The Joker…." Rachel whispered her eyes widening.

If there was any truth to The Joker's story about his brother, it was that he was once a handsome man, oh he certainly was.

The boy in the photograph was only a shadow of The Joker now. Glasgow smile missing but amused twinkle still present in those eyes.

But the eyes were different, the eyes she was used to were empty, hollow yet still filled with sick sadistic amusement, these eyes were filled with warmth and a certain cheekiness that melted Rachel's heart.

Rachel felt sadness overwhelm her, "What happened to you..." she whispered to the emptiness of the room.

"… You know… it's rude to go through other peoples…….poss-essions … when you… are a guest in their home" a voice came from behind her.

Rachel jumped, letting out a little scream of surprise as she spun around to face The Joker standing in front of her with a tiara atop his green tinged hair.

Dropping the photograph, she clutched her chest in fright "Oh my god… did _you _know it's rude to sneak up on people!... and besides since when was I a guest?" Rachel scoffed.

"…Guest… hostage… it's all the same" The Joker said shoving a bag into her hands.

Rachel looked down at the warm paper bag that The Joker had given her. The aroma coming from it was so delicious that Rachel could feel her mouth watering.

She opened the bag with her fingers and nearly died of delight when she saw a juicy hamburger waiting to be devoured, normally fast food was not her thing, but she was just too hungry to care.

Sitting down in her usual position across from The Joker she picked up the burger taking a bite so large she would normally have been embarrassed.  
'Oh...God glorious food!' she thought to her self moaning.

"Careful…. Miss Dawes... Don't get to….pers-on-al with the processed meat product… I might get jealous!" The Joker said feigning hurt.

Rachel didn't bother to answer him; she just stared at his face, that face hidden behind red, black and white. It was funny, she had always been curious as to what The Joker would look like without makeup, and now after seeing that picture she could see him.

Despite the make up on his face, she could see his beautiful one hidden underneath…somewhere.  
She couldn't help but smile a little, she could see that boy still hidden somewhere within that Make up.

"…What do I have something on my face?" The Joker said sarcasm dripping from every word.

Rachel just shook her head, trying desperately hard not to laugh and scream at him at the same time. Never a serious moment, no …being serious meant not being quite so empty.

"Would you look at that…….a smile... you finally get the joke Rachel!" The Joker said eyes boring into hers, lopsided smirk in place.

Rachel's eyes flickered to the tiara on his head, processing it for the first time since he came in.  
something in the pit of her stomach churned. The slight smile currently gracing her lips disappearing almost instantly.  
Remembering the glittery hat he had worn previously... a souvenir he said… from a man he had killed.  
Rachel felt bile rise into her throat.

"Another Souvenir?" Rachel said her voice filled with disgust as she gestured to the beautifully jeweled tiara atop his head.

The Joker took the tiara from his head running his gloved fingers over the sparkly diamonds decorating it. A smile of reminiscence graced his lips.

"Yeah…. I just couldn't...Help...Myself... a pretty young woman gave it to me…..as a present…for making her….smile" he said darkly making the hairs on Rachel's arms stand on end.

Rachel looked into those eyes and then to the items in his hands, his knife in one hand and the tiara in the other. Images of a young woman screaming while having her mouth sliced open filled her head and she squeezed her eyes shut to rid herself of them.

Rachel sighed turning back to her food. Suddenly not feeling as hungry as she was before.

There were just some things that couldn't be fixed a voice deep inside told her and no matter how deeply disturbing or sad it was, The Joker could never be fixed.

The Boy that she saw in the photograph was dead. There was no going back, not after everything that The Joker had done.  
It didn't matter that something horrible had probably happened to him at some point in his life to change him so drastically.

It didn't matter that he filled her with so many different emotions all at once, disgust, hatred…lust, sympathy.  
It didn't matter that his mere presence overwhelmed her.

He was something that could never be tamed, he was too far gone anyway and it was stupid to even think that she could uncover the lost boy underneath Rachel told herself.

That boy didn't exist anymore, and she would never find out why and some part of her didn't want to know.  
She didn't want to know what horrible thing in this cruel world took that beautiful young man and turned him into a monster……Turned him into a Joker.

Despite the fact that her logical voice kept telling her this Rachel couldn't help but risk another glance at the man sitting opposite her playing with his knife.  
Despite all that she knew about him, all that he had done, she could no longer deny that she was, in some sick demented way, attracted to him.

* * *

_and so the Stockholm Syndrome really starts to set in. it is not simply a physical pull now but.. .a new emotional one.  
Not a lot of dialogue in this one... but hopefully i'll make up for that in the next one :) _

_also; i got into an odd fight with someone online who told me to learn how to spell before i posted things on a board the other day...because i apparently mispelled 'Colour' and 'Favourite' of course... it didn't seem to help that i told the person that i was Australian! _

SO .. _heh just in case some of you people hadn't already guessed I am Australian.. .like our dear Heath3. and we spell certain words differently than the U.S, which most people already know.. rolls eyes the dumb nut on the forum however didn't _

_so now thats over an done with review review review!_


	8. Chapter 8 Love

_WOW!! hahe thank you sooo much for the reviews seriously... i wouldn't still be writing if it wasn't for you wonderful gorgeous people, so... i bowl down to you worships  
anyway... here is the new chapter... or installment.. whatever you want to call it. I hope you enjoyed it... i struggled a little with this one and i put a lot of effort into it... and im feeling slightly insecure over it eeek. i still hope that you all like it :)  
_

**PhantasmBunny - **well... the start of it was as it started the night of the fundraiser.. but now its kind of set in an AU... kind of.. i think ?

**Phoenix Feather Queens - **Color and Favorite... i do believe which is kind of weird seeing as most countries that speak english in the world spell it Colour and Favourite.. at least i think so...?

**Xany Kaos - **ahh yeaah... Draws -looks embarrassed- .. that was just a typo hehe ... Drawers... Draws close enough -buries head in keyboard-

**Ladyinverness - **ha! Flight of the conchords is hilarious hehe... and yeh New Zealand is a lot like Australia...except our accents are different...and they have more sheep ahahehehe.. -cough cough- sorry... that was an Aussie NZ joke... some people say that NZ to Australia is what Wales is to England and what Canada is to USA ...

**disclaimer : I Do not own any of these characters ... but the plot..well yeahh that was my idea heeeeheeee! **

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter eight - Love

Rachel looked towards The Joker for the millionth time that day; he had hardly said anything which was really starting to confuse her.

Normally he wouldn't shut up, constantly talking about everything and nothing at the same time and almost always talking about inappropriate topics.

He was normally doing anything he possibly could to annoy her and make this awful situation even worse but now he was just sitting there, back against the wall, eyes closed like he was sleeping.

Sleeping….? Rachel thought to herself. For some reason it seemed funny to imagine The Joker sleeping, it seemed like such a normal thing to do.

It was stupid, he obviously had to sleep sometime but imagining him actually getting into bed wearing jim jams was impossible to visualize.

'He's probably more of sleep-in-the-nude type of guy' she thought giggling out loud then mentally slapping herself for thinking such thoughts.

"Giggling is a sign of insanity" The Joker's voice echoed through the room.

'Okay.. Not asleep' Rachel thought to herself.

"Figures… that explains why you do it all the time" Rachel said sounding bored, how much longer was he going to keep her locked up like a prisoner?

"Yes, but……… there are two type of Insane people in this world…..those who know they are insane and those who don't" he said.

Rachel raised her eyebrows, she'd never thought of it that way.  
"…What category do you fit into?" She said.

"….. I belong to a…..new category, a better class of criminal….a better class of in-san-ity"  
Rachel frowned "I thought you said you weren't crazy"

"I'm not…..Crazy….. you'd think for a woman who works to put Gotham's criminals behind bars you'd know the difference between……crazy….and insane" The Joker said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Rachael's brow knitted together in thought 'wait…..there was a difference between crazy and insane? There was a new one'.

"Okay….." Rachel said standing up and taking a few more steps towards The Joker.  
"Tell me the difference" She said sitting down so she was literally sitting right in front of him.

"Well for example. I… am not crazy…. The things that….. I do….. Make sense… I'm not some…. Some…blithering idiot who …. Spits out random crap….

I have….in-tell-ect. An insane person…. Can….be..Smart and can scheme…. I however am not a schemer, but I do make sense…most of the time. A crazy person can be….re-habilitated….. Integrated back into…society" The Joker said waving his hands around in gestures.  
"An… insane person cannot be reasoned with…they cannot be changed…. They simply….are"

The Jokers words echoed through Rachel's mind, reminding her of all that had happened since The Joker had abducted her and took her to this place. All this time she simply saw him as nothing but a crazy lunatic…. But maybe he was right.

Blinking she said "…that actually made some sense"

The Joker's scarred face widened in a grin that could only be described as sadistic "……. Of course it did…. I have in-tell-ect" . He said with a sense of almost pride.

Rachel rolled her eyes; this clown definitely had ego problems.

"Eye rolling is not a good look for you Rachel……. you should stick to smiling"

Rachel narrowed her eyes, sending glares at him.

"All the world ….loves….a smile" The Joker said, leaning forward so his hands were on her cheeks, he lifted the corners of her mouth into a forced smile.

Rachel glared at him sending as much hatred as she possibly could into her eyes, though she couldn't help but let a little laughter escape before squirming away from his hands.

The Joker burst out into manically laughter  
"Oh… you are soo much fun... why do you spend so much time with Dent ... He's so booring!" he said giggling.

"Because I love him, you know….Love…. or have you not heard of it?" Rachel said voice dripped in sarcasm.

The Joker scoffed "loves overrated….why have love….when you can have…..chaos".

The Joker's voice lowered considerably as he leaned even further towards Rachel.  
"Love…..dies… but Chaos… Miss Dawes... Chaos lives on forever"

Rachel could feel the air surrounding them thicken almost instantly and she suddenly found it harder to breathe.  
"Some people would say the same thing about love".

Rachel could feel The Jokers breath blowing against her cheek as The Joker laughed with amusement.

"People who think that Miss Dawes… are those ….. Who have not been… en-lightened...like me" He growled against the skin of her cheek.  


Rachel refused to let him get to her, she promised herself after that incident in the shower that she would not let him know how much he affected her and she promised herself that she wouldn't let him win the game that he had started, so as long as she was here, she was going to play.

So forcing a smirk onto her face despite the slightly queasy feeling within her gut she moved her lips to whisper in his ear.

"Someone who doesn't know what love is _would _say that"

The Joker chuckled leaning back so he could look her in the eyes.

Reaching out with his fingers to caress her chin he said  
"Ahaho!! … You got spunk…. "Growling he added "I liiike it".

Rachel pursed her lips putting on a façade, despite the fact that inside she felt a tightening within her stomach like it was tying itself in knots.

She could see the colour of his eyes darkening, heavy with something else other than amusement for once.  
And to her own surprise she felt a similar feeling well upside her, no doubt showing in her own eyes too. Her face could perhaps hide what she was currently feeling…. But her eyes definitely could not.

The Joker chuckled again leaning even further forward.  
"Why so serious Rachel..._cat got your tongue_" The Joker said quoting something that she'd said herself to him.

Rachel couldn't keep her eyes open any longer the way he was looking at her, the way his eyes were boring into her, the way it was like he was crawling into her soul it was too overwhelming.

The Joker cupped her cheek in his gloved hand pulling her face close to his  
"Hey…. Look at me……. _look…. At…..me!" _ He growled.

Rachel hesitantly opened her eyes to be faced with The Joker's painted one, their eyes completely level with each others.

"Love…… is….like going crazy… It has no sense…..its….senseless…. its every single painful memory…. It's…. Like a wound…..getting cut open time and time again…… just waiting for the pain to end.. But the torture never does and eventually…the wound…turns into ….a scar… a constant…reminder…. And guess what... Rachel…..scars can be reopened.

"It sounds like chaos to me" She said, voice slightly shaky.

The Joker stopped, looking as though he was thinking about what she'd said.  
"…….hmmm" he said licking the skin of her cheek to her ear  
"but It's not nearly….as fun"

Rachel could feel herself shaking as The Joker trailed his lips back to her lips.  
They were so close she could almost feel them, this should disgust her, and she knew it. And it did… in a way.

Nothing had ever disgusted her and aroused her so much in her life.  
She felt tingling sensations in her fingertips; she was aching to pull him to her.

The Jokers bleeding smile widened as he pulled her into a bruising kiss.  
Rachel didn't know what she should be feeling, halfway in-between pushing him away and pulling him closer she grasped at his shoulders.

Rachel moaned into the kiss as she ran her fingers through his hair, it felt like every nerve ending was on fire sending shock-waves of pleasure to her entire body.

The Jokers hands grasped her neck, a firm grip but not tight enough to choke her, but it didn't scare her, it only aroused her more.

Pulling away to finally catch her breath The Joker laughed evilly and yet still seductively.  
Licking his lips he said "mmm Raaaachel… you taste good"

"Harrrrvey's a lucky man".

Rachel gasped feeling her heart stop beating in her chest. How could she of forgotten Harvey? Harvey who she loved with every fibre of her being, Harvey who just a few days ago basically asked her to marry him. Harvey…who she planned on spending the rest of her life with!

Pushing The Joker away Rachel stumbled to her feet backing away slowly. How could she of let that happen? How could she of enjoyed it so much?

Lifting her fingers to her lips she closed her eyes feeling disgust hit her like a ton of bricks. Hearing the Jokers cruel laughter she felt tears begin to build in her eyes.

"What's the matter Beautiful…… forgot about your White… Knight?"

"Don't worry…. Its ooo-kay…. .It happens to all women… I'm…irresistible... Its just apart of my charm!" he laughed.

Rachel met his eyes, feeling sick to her stomach "…. You asshole" She whispered.

"Oh Miss Dawes that's not very polite... I expect better manners from you"

Rachel began to pace around the room, millions of different thoughts running through her head at once, all the while The Joker laughed hysterically while he got up walking towards the door.  
"Until, tomorrow….. I have a date with a bat" He laughed while exiting the door.

Picking up the nearest object to her, which just so happened to be the dust covered jewelry box, Rachel launched it at the door as The Joker closed it behind him.

Burying her face in her hands Rachel sobbed as she thought about what she had just done willingly, what she almost did… and she would have... she really would have.  
And what made her sick most was that despite the guilt she now felt inside, part of her still wanted him.

* * *

_sooo what do you think eh?... good...bad?... yes that 'Bat' is obviously our dear Batsy :D  
you know what to do... reviews make the world go round friends!  
_


	9. Chapter 9 Confrontation

_Hello again :) it seems like just yesterday that i last did this... oh wait it was heheh...-cough cough- ...i try to be funny it doesn't work... but kudos to me for trying eh eh eh..?.. no ?.. ok i'll stop.  
It seems like our little ship is growing and growing every day which is awesome because 'Jokachel' as its affectionately called by some is simply awesome..and so much fun xD so woohoo for us!!  
anyway here is my... not-so-long awaited next chapter of my like totally awesomecore story... (again...i try to be funny.. and i just end up looking like a loser...oh well hopefully you can forgive me)_****

Disclaimer : the only the thing i own... is The Joker.. thats right i own him he's all mine mine mine!... seriously? ahh no xD the only thing i own is the plot.

**ChristineDae17 - **OOH yes i loved the 'look at me' line too, gave me the shivers.

**MuffinsNMalice - **thanks for pointing that out to me... hehe.. oh dear i really do need help when it comes to that kind of thing, thanks for the review :)

**teachesmesweetheart - **yeaah... -looks defeated- those little dots own me. i can't control them... they have a mind of their own... argh! ...

**Thank you, to all reviewers i love you all!...seriously... i'd marry you all if i could. **

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter Nine - Confrontation

The Joker paced the dark alley of Gotham's underworld.  
He'd been contacting Batman many times in the last few days, constantly mocking him, oh it was hilarious!

Everytime he'd left Rachel alone he was creating more havoc on the city, but he'd been paying special attention to The Batman, just waiting for him to…lose control.  
Personally he was kind of hoping that he'd loose control so much that he'd just kill him!

Some people would say that he could be considered Suicidal. The Joker laughed to himself.  
NO he was not suicidal…..he just saw the bigger picture. Life did not mean anything….. it was the cause.

His cause was to make The Batman, the self-righteous savior break his one rule.  
If Batman did end up killing him then he'd lowered himself even further... of course it was Harvey Dent who would be the true final picture for his cause.

If he could destroy Harvey Dent then maybe he'd show Gotham that there was no cure for human nature. When push came to shove, even the greatest of men could and would…fall.  
What was the answer to this, what could make Batsy and Dent lower themselves… Rachel Dawes of course.

The Joker smiled ahhh Rachel Dawes, that feisty little vixen.

She sure had made an impression on him.  
He giggled to himself remembering the way she basically threw herself at him… haha! Oh that would kill Harvey to know that his precious angel had almost done the nasty with the likes of him!  
and Batman…well if he was right in thinking there was more to Rachel and his relationship than most people thought well he would probably feel the same….maybe Batman would even go as far as to kill him Oh that _would_ be interesting.

'One can only hope' The Joker thought to himself.

And that is what had lead him to the position he was now in, people had obviously noticed that Young Miss Dawes had gone missing and obviously he was the number one suspect for her abduction.

So what was one way to have a full on confrontation with his dear old friend, which is all he really wanted anyway, to get him riled him, to piss him off, he was so fun when he was pissed, all he had to do was tell him he had his lovely lady friend of course…and he should be here…any…minute.

Nothing happened……..

The Joker scoffed "Well….that is just…rude" He muttered to himself looking at the almost silent alley.

Maybe he underestimated Batman's feelings for Rachel….maybe he should have just gone straight to Harvey Dent.  
Of course Dent wasn't nearly as fun.

The destruction of Gotham's White Knight was something that he had been thoroughly thinking about but at this point in time what he wanted was to uncover the true identity of Batman…. And have some fun with him while at it, Kidnapping Rachel sure was a start.

The Joker sighed; planning things was so complicated, and stressful…. And stress was not good for his complexion… he giggled at his own joke, ahheha! He'd have to remember that one.

Suddenly the Joker heard something behind him, it sounded like a large gust of wind, a small smirk developing on his red smeared mouth.  
"I was beginning to think…that you stood me up!" he said.

He turned around to face Batman, who did not look amused at all.

"Where is she?!" his gruff voice said which The Joker guessed was meant to sound menacing he only laughed.  
"….Aren't you going to buy me a drink first?" The Joker said sarcastically.

Batman did not smile instead he advanced on The Joker grabbing him by the collar of his coat.

He lifted him up from his feet smashing him against the brick wall of the alley.

The Joker felt his head smack back against the brick wall, he could feel the skin on the back of his head break and he swore he could feel wetness seep through his hair changing the colour from green to red.

The Joker laughed hysterically through the searing pain in his head making Batman punch him in the face, his nose making a sickening crunch.

The Joker groaned in pain and giggled at the same time squeezing his eye's shut as he felt the bone in his nose break.  
"OW!" he moaned through his laughter.

"What is wrong with you?" Batman said as he watched The Joker realign his nose, snapping it back into place all the while laughing manically.

"Where is Rachel?" He said his voice lined with anger and desperation.

The Joker licked his lips; licking away some of the blood that had begun to flow from his nose and run down his chin.

"Rachel?... oh Miss Dawes well, I don't know who's been telling you little fibs Bats, but I have nothing to do with her disappearance" He said, but before he could do anything else he felt himself thrown to the hard ground by Batman's fist.

He instantly knew his lips had split open spraying blood in his mouth and across his cheeks mixing in with the red lipstick smudged across his scars.

Batman lifted him up by his collar again so they were face to face.  
"You're lying!" he growled out angrily.

The Joker broke out into another fit of gut splitting hysterical laughter; his yellowed teeth were now stained red from his blood as he gave huge woops of laughter, the blood began running down his chin.

"Maybe I am….. Maybe I'm not either way who knows what's happening to your poor defenseless Damsel!"

"Wasting time here Batman…. She could be in pain...Right…now! … and here you are….beating on little old me!" He giggled.

"You're Insane" Batman rasped.  
The Joker rolled his eyes "Well…yeaaaah…..where have _you_ been?"

"Tell me where she is… or so help me god I'll-"

The Jokers laughter cut him off again "You'll kill me! hahaaa……..oooh.. . Batsy Batsy…Bats…. You have …_nothing_ to threaten me with"

"Tell me… how's… Haarvey dealing with this terrible pred-dic-a-ment…. That Miss Dawes has found herself in…. hmm?" The Joker said amusement dripping off every syllable.

"Does Harvey know about his lady love and Gotham's watchful protect-err?.  
Say.. It must hurt knowing that the woman you love…is sleeping in _his _arms every night….. Must really wound you to know….just how alone you really are….."  
before The Joker could say another word Batman had smashed his face into the brick wall again.

The Joker felt the skin of his cheek being grazed off and split open and he felt the delicious feeling of blood run down his cheek.  
"Woo….haah... touched a nerve I see…. You're alone… because though this city looks up to you, wants you to protect them from the big…bad… criminals... In the end….You're just a freak…. Like me! hahaa-"

"Shut up!" Batman said punching him in the stomach.

The Joker felt Batmans knock to his stomach, it felt as though he'd been run over by a truck; he swore he felt one of his ribs snap... Batman sure had one hell of a punch on him.

The blow once again knocked The Joker to the ground, still giggling despite the pain rippling through his body his Chelsea grin widened "Say… have I ever told you how I my scars?...no? Well I was a young boy.. And my father well he….he was the violent type he-"Batman cut him off

"Where is Rachel! Where is she!" he growled.

"OH… come on everyone loves a sob story!" The Joker laughed.

"You know……a lot can happen in a few days… did you ever think…. Dear Rachel…might not want to be rescued, I mean going back to the boring life of being Harvey Dent's trophy wife... I Mean I can see why she wouldn't"

"You never had any plans on telling me where she is" Batman said through clenched teeth.  
Struggling to his feet, with some difficulty he muffled his gasps and groans of pain with forced laughter though the laughter was slightly strained this time.

"…You're just too much fun… I love our little dates together; they're all I have to look forward too…. You…complete…me" He said in a mocking tone.

"I'll find Rachel, Joker… and next time I see you I will kill you..." Batman said gritting his teeth.  
"I look forward too it" The Joker said "Until next time" He waved as Batman disappeared into the night.

Holding his throbbing side he stumbled out of the darkened alley leaving nothing but echoes of their confrontation behind.

* * *

_ahhhh... .so no there wasn't any Joker/Rachel interaction in this one.. but I had fun making Bruce beat up The Joker... that part in the interregation room is one of my favourite parts in the movie i figured that since this fic is in a slightly AU world that it would still have some slightly similar moments and this was one of them xD  
I hope you like!  
i'll update soon ... as i always do -wink wink-_


	10. Chapter 10 Scars

_thanks for the reviews fellow readers it is muchly appreciated!  
_

_anyway another chapter in which...I feel is slightly...below mediocre and perhaps slightly OOC mainly on the Jokers part..._

_well enjoy anyways!!_

_Disclaimer : I do not deserve credit for these characters they are not mine. however the plot is ...and the plot is so cool i get credit for that :D_

**silentlamb9 - **about the whole not seeing any evidence that the joker cares about Rachel... well thats because he doesn't really... not yet anyway. patience grasshopper...patience this fic is most likely going to be a really long one so things like that will develop slowly. and about Batman not doing anything but.. beating him up yeaaah i was kind of thinking about that as well... that was one of the things that i was not to happy with but i couldn't think of any way of writing it... oh well.

**Rachelle123 - **yeaah im sadistic too and guys getting beat up is kind hot to me as well... what is wrong with us? heh.

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter Ten - Scars

Rachel wiped another tear from her cheek, it was starting to get ridiculous but nothing she did seemed to stop the flow of her tears. She was sure that she could probably drown herself in them if she bottled how much she had cried in the last few hours.

The guilt was eating her up inside, she felt it course through her body making her only cry harder.  
It wasn't the fact that she kissed The Joker that made her feel so sickened or guilty…though that was part of it.

It was mainly the fact that she knew what she was doing, she would have probably gone further had he pushed it and half of her still ached for more.

She couldn't explain it, and she didn't even want to explain it, it would be too impossible to put into words.

Was this what the Joker had planned all along? To kidnap her , most likely to get Bruce to come to her rescue, of course he didn't know that Batman was Billionaire playboy Bruce Wayne, but it was only an amount of time before he finally figured it out some how. In the meantime seduce her with all his…..seductive qualities was that his plan?

Rachel groaned feeling a new fresh wave of tears flow from her eyes, she was getting exhausted from all this emotion she couldn't remember the last time she had felt this horrible, this absolutely helpless.

Once again on the score board of their little game it seemed it was Joker - 8 (or more…she'd already lost count) Rachel – 0.

Just as she was thinking this she heard a bang outside the room she was currently isolated in.  
Oh great, her captor had returned. 'Probably to tease me some more' she thought bitterly.

Her breath caught in her throat as He entered the room.  
He looked awful; some of the paint normally covering his face had been chipped off revealing his skin, There was a laceration on his lip, blood dripping from his mouth and nose and a bruised cheek bone that had begun to swell.

He walked inside and she noticed that he also seemed to be favouring his left side, someone had beaten him up pretty bad, she had a pretty good idea who, he did say he had a date with a _bat_ it wasn't too hard to figure out.

"You look…awful….you really ought to take better care of yourself Rachel" The Joker said gesturing to her tear stained cheeks and bloodshot puffy eyes.

Rachel scoffed "Speak for yourself"

The Joker muffled his groan of pain by giggling incessantly as he made his way for the bathroom door.

Rachel got to her feet, following him slowly, as she took slow steps towards her destination she heard the running of water and the pain-filled gasps and groans mixed in with humorous laughter.  
Rachel couldn't help but roll her eyes.

Typical of him to still be making a joke of things while he's bleeding.

Rachel watched from the door frame as he took off his purple coat and lifted up his shirt revealing a very nasty purple looking bruise forming on his abdomen.

She gasped covering her mouth with her hand  
"What happened...?" She said her voice shaking slightly.

The Joker chuckled "Our Friend the Batman sure has a fist made of metal, I should know I'm the one who had them ploughed into my face and ribs" he said cheerfully.

Rachel shook her head in disbelief "You idiot..."

Taking a hesitant step towards him she reached out to touch the painful bruising along his ribs.  
"What do you have a death wish or something?" She asked incredulous to someone who would put themselves through so much pain and still find it funny.

The Joker laughed "Some people seem to think so…."

Running her hands over his bruising she could feel his ribs, his skin was warm underneath her finger tips and sent shocks of electricity through her body, she swallowed hard trying to ignore her body's reaction.  
"…It looks broken; you should go to the hospital and get this checked out"

The Jokers laughter got louder

"…You know for someone who's intelligent... You are not very smart Miss Dawes" he said

Rachel frowned "What are you talking about?"

"I am currently….. The most hated man in Gotham, and I'm just going to waltz into a nearby hospital and get treated by some pretty little nurse….maybe a sponge bath too"

Rachel's frowned deepened, she hadn't thought about that, living in isolation she had started to forget exactly who her captor was, all the things he had probably done while he left her there, god knows how many people he'd killed…maybe even people she knew. Her stomach churned at that thought.

"Oh…right" She said nodding.

"Though…. I wouldn't say no to a sponge bath from you…Nurse Rachel" he said licking his lips

Rachel glared at him though she knew she probably would conform to being his naughty nurse 'oh god...Bad thoughts Rachel don't go there' she thought angrily to herself.

"God… don't you ever stop?" she said frustration obvious in her tone. This did nothing but make The Joker chuckle more.

"You just got your ribs broken by someone's fist and your still cracking jokes…"

"I only laugh…to keep from weeping" he said mock sadness filling his voice.

"Besides….I've had much worse... So don't go worrying your pretty little head over me…" he said.

Rachel shook her head again "You're unbelievable…"

"Believe it Beautiful……… I can handle this myself.. I've had practice" he said spitefully gesturing to his scars.

Surprisingly a wave of sympathy washed over Rachel that made her heart twinge with something that she had trouble defining.  
It left her feeling slightly breathless.

The Joker who had removed his shirt and was now smiling almost cheekily at her.  
"Now now.. Miss Dawes I know I'm sexy and all… but you don't need to have a heart attack" he said giggling.

Rachel felt herself blush and immediately diverted her eyes, 'do not think dirty thoughts about insane clown do not think dirty thoughts about the half-naked insane clown standing in front of you…oh god please help me!' she thought halfway between hyperventilating and having a full out cardiac arrest.

Taking a deep breath she looked back at the Joker and fully processed his face, it was even more of a mess than normal. Blood had trailed its way from his mouth and had run down his neck.  
'So much blood for just a small cut' she thought.

Grabbing a small hand towel from the sink she ran it under the water.  
Gesturing to the small empty linen cupboard opposite the sink she said "Sit down"

Following her orders he sat down on top of the small storage facility.  
"Did I ever tell you that I just love a girl….who takes control" he said grinning, blood stained teeth showing making Rachel cringe… that had to taste terrible..Though he didn't exactly strike her as the type of guy who had hygiene at the top of his priorities list, she figured it was more like chaos, death and destruction.

"…You said you liked that I could kick your ass" she muttered walking towards him with the wet hand towel in hand.

"Oh yeaaaah…. We never did get to that ass…kicking we talked about did we hmm?" he said licking his lips again.

Stepping so she was literally wedged between the Jokers legs she wiped away the dried blood from his neck and chin taking some of the smeared white paint with it.

She instantly felt her heart rate increase more, was she going to see him without the makeup? Or would he stop her from getting to that point.

Trying to distract herself from where those thoughts were sure to lead she brought up a question that had been plaguing her for a while now  
"Why did you want to talk with Batman anyway" She said wiping away the blood from his still bruised nose.

"He had some…business that he wanted to discuss with me" The Joker said smirking.

Rachel scoffed "Business…with you… that resulted in him beating your face in?... what business could he possibly have to discuss with….._oh_" she said pausing her task.

The Joker reached out to wrap his fingers around a loose tendril of her hair pulling on it slightly sending small tingles of pain to her scalp.  
"You….were the main topic of con-ver-sation actually…. Yeah…..see as it turns out he really is willing to do just about anything to rescue you….from my evil lair"

"…it's hardly an evil lair…more like abandoned building in the final stages of being torn down" Rachel said nervous laugh escaping.

"Raaaachel……… look who's got herself a case of bad manners….and you say I'm the rude one" he said leaning in so she could see his scars up close without make up for the first time.

She had begun wiping the makeup and blood from that side of his face and it didn't seem like The Joker had even realized it.

Without thinking Rachel lifted her fingers to the healed lacerations running her fingers over the bumpy scars. The Joker growled grabbing her wrists almost instantly, the grip on her wrists were so hard that she actually felt pain radiate up her arms.

The almost ever-present smile on his face had disappeared replaced with an almost disgusted scowl.

Rachel gasped taking a step away from the very pissed off looking clown, she really didn't fancy another case of Lets-cut-up-Rachel's-mouth-for-kicks.

"I…I'm sorry... I don't know why I did that" She said quietly looking at the tiled floor of the bathroom.

"Yeah…...well I'll let you off this once because I'm such a nice person….. Try anything sneaky like that again and I'll cut your fingers off" he growled picking up his shirt and coat he walked out of the bathroom without saying another word.

Rachel felt her hands shake, letting the now blood stained hand towel fall to the floor she covered her mouth with her hand.  


"Stupid" She muttered to herself.  
'Why did you do that?' her inner voice said. 'You knew nothing good could come of it'

Feeling faint all of a sudden she sat down on the linen cupboard that the Joker had just occupied, burying her face in her hands she took a few deep breaths, feeling too exhausted to cry any longer.  
How exactly had she made such a mess of her life in a few short days?

* * *

_so... um thoughs anyone? Im a little in-between-days (Don't you love 'The Cure' references) on it... but i put a lot of effort in it and i was slightly delirious with lack of sleep when i wrote it...so that might have something to do with the crap-awfulness of it. _

_so, i normally update everyday because i can't concentrate on anything else if i don't, but i might not be able to update tomorrow as i have a party to attend tonight.  
yes... I am going to partaaay. which should be interesting considering my social group normally spends there 'shindigs' having guitar hero competitions and playing the Wii... dude we are such nerds.  
we'll get up to the usual shenanigans and tomfoolery... then i may need a day to recover from said shenanigans and tomfoolery so i may not update...of course i might ... but don't get your hopes up.  
Oh NOssss i hope you all can hold out for a few days -is sarcastic- ... never shy away from sarcasm friends...it makes the world go around.. kinda like smiles :D  
anyways Review, you know how much i love it... i have like ..some kind of review fetish hehe. _


	11. Chapter 11 Saved

_Here i am again, I'm back and I'm alive and kicking..well not so much the kicking part..  
this one took me ages to do and i'm actually quite proud of it..of course it could turn out and be totally crap in your eyes but either way im still happy with it :)  
So enjoy despite its extremely short length. _

_disclaimer : I own this...completely... give me the royalties for the batman franchise .. its all me My masterpiece MWahaha... ?? uh...any truth to this statement.. what do you think?_

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter Eleven : Saved

The Joker walked out of the bathroom ignoring the throbbing pain in his side. He felt a new type of feeling wash over him, one that he hadn't felt in a long while, and one that he really didn't want to feel.

It had been a very long time since anyone had touched him like _she_ just did.  
Simply touching him because they wanted to, and not touching him because they were beating the crap out of him. Simply touching him gently. Uggh It just made him sick! Not to mention that Rachel had seen him without his face completely covered with makeup, actually seen his skin, what he liked to keep hidden.

He felt the urge to grab his knife and just slit her throat and be done with it, but no he couldn't.

He needed her other wise there would be nothing to dangle in front of the bat.  
Well, he couldn't kill her now that didn't mean that he couldn't kill her later on perhaps?

The Joker felt a smile tug at the corners of his scarred mouth, ahhh that's better.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rachel decided that she needed to walk in without fear, of course she felt like that at any moment she was going to scream and run as far away from The Joker as possible. She did not want him to see her scared. That would be just giving away free points, and he'd continue to win their little game.

Standing in front of the door Rachel contemplated what had caused this whole mess, she touched him.  
Actually reached out and touched his scarred flesh. No make up on those old wounds.

Even despite the scars, he looked so human.

Rachel didn't think, only realizing exactly what she was doing when she felt his hands around her wrists.  
She thought that was it, He was going to kill her; she'd taken it too far. But he didn't he just growled and walked off without doing anything which surprised her immensely.

Opening the door Rachel felt her breath catch as she walked into an empty room. Surprisingly she felt a twinge of disappointment in her heart. Which shocked her, why was she disappointed again?

Shouldn't she be relieved that he wasn't there to put a knife to her throat?

What was happening to her?

All these questions running through her head she didn't even notice when The Joker entered the room again, dried blood gone from his face and a new application of makeup applied.

Rachel gasped when she finally realized that she was no longer alone. He didn't look angry at all, he looked like he always looked.

Sarcastic and sadistic amusement written all over his face.

"Rachel, you'll catch flies" he said walking over to her, apparently Rachel had her mouth hanging open because The Joker lifted his hand to her chin shutting it for her.

Before she could even retort he had walked away and sat down in his usual position against the wall.  
Rachel began to walk to her own usual position across from him, on the other side of the room but stopped halfway when an unusual urge welled upside her.

Taking a deep breath, ignoring the logical side of her brain that said that she should stay as far away from him as possible she slowly walked up to The Joker taking a seat next to him.

Rachel met the Joker's gaze, his eyes were slightly wide, eyebrows raised, he looked utterly surprised that she had sat next to him.

Turning away from him so she wouldn't have to look at his face anymore Rachel heard him chuckling, no doubt his eyes were still boring into her.

"Keeping Murderers company are we Miss Dawes...hmm do you do this with all Gotham's Criminals….. sit with them while they rot in prison… or in the interrogation room perhaps… holding their hand while they confess…….their sins" The Joker said, his voice steady yet still filled with so much laughter.

Rachel shook her head "You not like most of Gotham's Criminals"

"Oh…no no no…..of course not… I'm…Special right… I can be..Saved? Or ….whats the word Rachel.. Redeemed? Hmm.. Is that whats going on in that beaut-if-ul noggin of yours" He said playfully tapping her on the head.

Rachel scoffed, her amused laughter coming out in a cackle

"NO... Redemption can only happen if the person wants to be redeemed. And you Joker have no qualms about the..things that you do….. The people that you kill… no it doesn't bother you at all, so do I think that I can somehow save you? The answer is no"

"Hmm….. And yet… here you are, sitting by my side….when we have this extremely….larrge room to occupy... Tell me why that is?" The Joker said gesturing to the room they currently sat in.

Rachel opened her mouth to defend herself but closed it again when no words came out. Her mind went blank, because she herself had been wondering the exact same thing. Why was she sitting next to him when a lot of the time she wanted to be as far away from him as possible, afraid of what would happen if he touched her again, afraid that she wouldn't be able to stop herself.

The Jokers bleeding mouth cracked open laughter spilling out.  
"Or….maybe you like the fact that you're sitting next to…a…..a _madman_ who can kill you at any moment….. What's the matter Rachel... Bored with your life at home…. Need some…excite-ment to spice up your life…… or maybe you like being scared?"

Getting defensive Rachel glared at The Joker

"I'm absolutely happy with my life thank you very much…and I don't know about you … but I don't find sitting here bored out of my mind with an annoying egotistical man with a painted face… exciting"

Rachel felt her body react to the anger, her heart rate increase, her hands clenching and oh... It was exciting, a new type of excitement that she'd never felt before, Rachel found herself having fun bickering with her captor.

"….and I'm not scared of you" she added.

The Joker had somehow scooted even closer to her so that their shoulders were touching.  
Giggling slightly as he reached out to her face, cupping her cheek he turned her face so that she was looking at him.

Rachel felt her body start to tremble slightly, but she refused to let it show.  
'I'm not scared…I'm not scared I'm not scared' she repeated her mantra inside her head willing it to be true.  
But she was afraid, but not for the reasons that she probably should have been.

His fingers caressed her cheek, gently, that didn't seem to be in anyway threatening, it was like he was touching her…just because he wanted to.

But Rachel knew that was stupid, any minute now he was going to place the cool metal blade of his knife against her cheek, perhaps slicing it open letting blood trickle down… he'd probably lick it away with his warm wet tongue, whispering sadistic innuendo laced comments into her ear.

Rachel closed her eyes, leaning into his hand slightly as images of him licking away her blood from the small wound on her cheek flickered through her mind.

"Miss Dawes…..would it scare you to know that I could end your life…right…now" he said, voice lowering to a husky growl.

Rachel's eyes flew open, and she was faced with his blackened ones staring into hers.

"I could…. Squeeze the life…right out of you now until you…drifted..Into a peaceful sleep..Only.. You'd never wake up…and nobody would ever know what happened to poor Rachel Dawes" he said brushing tendrils of her dark hair behind her ear.  
"It'd be our little….secret" He whispered against her lips as he licked at them.

Rachel whimpered quietly feeling like every part of her body was about to explode from fear…anger...Arousa, she couldn't quite tell the difference between them anymore.

But staring into those eyes as he said these words she felt an almost comforting notion being reflected right back at her.  
"Are you scared now…Rachel?" The Joker said leaning back so he could look at her face.

Rachel looked in his eyes, heavy, but not with anger or hate they didn't look like they desired to end her life just at that moment, they were hooded and heavy with lust. A Lust that she felt in every surface of her body.

Her voice trembling she said "I'm not scared of you… just how you make me feel"

The Jokers eyes danced playfully as he moved away from her slightly, reaching into his coat.  
Rachel's eyes followed 'oh great…here comes the knife part' she thought, fear rearing its ugly head.

But he didn't pull out a knife, to her surprise he pulled out two cards.  
Rachel frowned eyeing the cards curiously.

The Joker's smile widened sadistically.  
"Do you want to see a magic trick?" he said turning the cards around so she could see what they were.

One was a Jack the other, a joker, Rachel frowned in confusion.

The Joker held the two cards in the palm of his hand both facing down so she could no longer see what they were.

He put his other palm against the cards, he moved his hands around slightly, lifting one hand revealed only one card.

Turning it around, she saw that it was The Joker card.  
Before Rachel could say anything the Joker had leant forward and put one hand behind her ear.  
Pulling out what seemed to be the missing card.

"Ta Da!" he said passing the card to Rachel.

Rachel turned the card around in her hands revealing the missing Jack that had disappeared.

"Impressive…"Rachel said as The Joker stood up from his position on the floor.

"You can keep the Jack" He said walking towards the door.

Rachel frowned confusion almost overwhelming her "…Why?"

"I don't like him…. But if I ever need him again I know who has it" he said manic laughter echoing in the room.  
"Sweet dreams Miss Dawes……" he said leaving Rachel alone once more.

Staring at the Jack in her hand she couldn't help but smile slightly. The saying lost things found were not lost, just simply misplaced echoed in her mind. A saying that she had always found somewhat comforting.

Curling up into a ball, with the Jack still in her hand, Rachel closed her eyes feeling sleep pull at her consciousness.

* * *

_eeeeeeeeeeek  
hehehehe... I love that! what do ya think then fellow Jokachel shippers?  
Good..bad should i just stop now before i kill you all with my absolutely horrid writing? _

Tell me the good, the bad i want it all ladies and gents..(Is there any gents reading this? ... doubt it oh well)  
review me.


	12. Chapter 12 Burn

_wow boy howdy... I'm nearly up to 100 reviews... i've never ... just woaaah  
how exciting!! I love you guys to pieces because personally i'm never really confident in the stuff that i write, but you people have motivated me and helped me so much, so i reward you with more of my masterpiece hahe.  
Im so happy with this chapter. It was weird, i have no idea where it came from but it was as though the words were literally being pulled from my brain...and i had no control Does that sound morbid? _

**loveisaplacex - **there for i now want to marry, and have babies with you :D thank you!!

**moonservant **- I'm glad you liked the symbolism of the jack card, i really liked it as well heheh.. and yeaah pretty much about the part of Rachel making The Joker remember what it was like as Jack Napier, of course we know he'll never really be Jack Napier again.

**Kendra Luehr -** I loved the whole idea that even though she knows that The Joker will...cannot change back part of her still holds onto to the real Jack... hehe its so romantic... in an almost twisted way.

**OnyxRose88 **- aw thank you for the review. I'm glad that you think i'm using my brain, i tried really hard to make sure that everything is some how tied in with each other.

**Ink and Parchment - **hahe I loved that line too goes all starry eyed oh how i love twisted romances... they are always the best kind!

**THANK YOU TO EVERY SINGLE PERSON WHO READ... AND EVERY SINGLE PERSON WHO REVIEWED, YOU OWN MY HEART **

disclaimer : I do not own any of these characters, they are simply pawns for my creative muse.

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter twelve - Burn

Rachel felt herself being pulled forward like she was being sucked into a room full of darkness.  
It was as if she had no control over her own feet, they were simply moving by themselves.

The darkness she was surrounded in was almost heart wrenching, there was nothing to see or touch or smell, everything was empty.

She reached out, her hand reaching to grasp something, but there was nothing to grasp.  
Rachel was simply walking into a black endless void.  
Wandering forever in the dark.

Loneliness pulled on her heart strings, weighing her down. How could she go on like this living inside this cruel darkness? This was worse than any terrifying ordeal that she might have to suffer through in the real world.

This dream world or nightmare world what ever a person would call it was every tiny little thing that scared her as a child, this vast array of space was every scream that erupted from her throat when she was faced with the horrible injustice of the world.  
This cold emptiness was like looking into the painful hollowness of The Joker's eyes.

Rachel felt tears fall from her eyes dripping down her ivory cheeks; this wasn't how it was meant to be.  
She was meant to live in a world of beautiful electrifying colour…with her knight, her beautiful handsome White Knight.

Not here…. Pulled into the darkness. Like someone grabbed hold of her hand and yanked her viciously down to their level. Basking in her pain, laughing at her tears, taking such intense pleasure at her down fall and confusion.

No…she was not meant to be in this hollow blood drenched world, Her captor, he took her by the hand while she struggled to break free, he laughed, his manic voice grating at her courage. Pulling her down in the depths of pain, leaving her to sink to his level and began this horrifying game… and she had no way out.

Laughter echoed through the darkness, sounding so distant and so close if that at all was impossible.  
Everything felt misty inside Rachel's head like she felt anytime he was close to her or touched her. There was never really a time when Rachel didn't feel fear within her body when he was close, but he wasn't now. She couldn't see any trace of the madman around only the distant echoes of his sadistic cackle.

Looking around desperate to find any way out of this hellish world she felt a presence behind her.

Rachel felt her heart beat increase but despite the fact that she knew, in all logic she should run as fast as she could her heart told her to turn around and face him, stare into those eyes that resembled the empty room that she currently inhabited, stare him down and feel the pain that he would wreak apon her just to tease and torture her.

She slowly turned around and yelled out in desperation and horror as she was faced with The Joker, only his face was dripping with blood, running over his painted features, blood drenched his entire body, soaking through his clothes and dripping into the blackness of where his feet stood.

"Why... so serious" He said mouth cracking open wide in a laugh so menacing that Rachel stumbled backwards. Blood poured from his laughing mouth, bubbling and frothing as he took a step towards her.

"Stop!" Rachel screamed out, but her voice felt wrong, she couldn't talk properly, her voice felt like she had swallowed a knife, slicing open the delicate flesh of her esophagus.

Rachel continued to beg him to stop, as he continued laughing, his mouth literally bleeding, and blood gurgling from his throat.

But her voice stopped as she began to cough and splutter feeling the warm metallic taste of blood work its way up her throat pouring from her mouth.

Suddenly she felt the entire weight of The Joker against her his hands pulling her to him and she felt all the will to fight back leave her body. She was too tired to fight any longer. Sickness pulled at her stomach as his bloody face smiled cruelly down at her.

Leaning down so his face was resting on hers, the blood from his mouth dripping onto her skin and into her hair Rachel felt disgust inside but despite her disgust she felt the horrifying urge to hold him.

Throwing her arms around him and burying her face in the crook of the Jokers neck she felt the blood that had soaked through his purple and green clothes soak through her own purple and green clothes.

"Would you look at that Rachel….we match" The Joker said giggling like he had just heard the funniest joke in the world.

'Everything's a joke' Rachel thought to herself 'everything…is always a joke!'

She knew that he had said this to her before, but this time they really did match.  
Standing there embraced like old lovers, blood splattered over both of their faces and soaked through their matching coloured clothes, it was like they were two different halves meeting again and being sewed back together in a blood drenched mess.

Rachel could feel only his body against hers; it was as if nothing mattered in that moment. She forgot everything, where she was, the fact that she was covered with her own sticky blood as well as his, there blood mixing in a sick and twisted bond that she felt would never break.  
It was the weirdest feeling and suddenly this dream world seemed less dream- like and more real and clarified than anything she had ever experienced.

"I guess…..we are more like each other than you thought… Miss Dawes" The Joker drawled his voice still laced with that same demented amusement that never seemed to fully disappear.  


Rachel frowned looking up at the Joker as his scarred mouth widened, still smiling as instead of blood pooling from his mouth a dozen Jack cards spilled from his cackling smile.

Rachel felt her whole body tremble as she looked down at her hand now holding what seemed to be the same familiar knife that he had held to her mouth many times in the past.

She had the knife in her hand and it was embedded in the Jokers blood drenched flesh.  
Rachel gasped instantly pulling the knife out and letting it fall to the blackness, still clattering like it had hit a tiled floor.

The only sound in the room, the sobs overwhelming her body and The Joker's dark laughter as he collapsed to what now was the dust filled floor of the room she was being held hostage.  
The Joker was almost in hysterics as he laughed holding one of his hands to his wound more blood spilling through his fingers.

Rachel looked around the room, and then back down to the now trembling figure of The Joker on the ground, his hysterical laughter now quieting down to amused giggles as he weakened from the blood loss.

"I'm sorry.."Rachel whispered not knowing what else to say feeling the tears burning down her cheeks and guilt crawl under her skin.

"Sorry is for people…who think its right to be sorry…after all after everything I've done…. I deserve it…Right?" The Joker said staring up Rachel with amused eyes.

Some voice in Rachel's head yelled at her, yes YES he does! But it seemed like it was being blurred out, muffled by the static forming in Rachel's head.

"No…" Rachel choked out; feeling like her throat was closing in on itself.

Suddenly The Joker's amused smile disappeared and a look appeared on his face that Rachel had never seen before, it didn't look natural on him, in fact it didn't look like The Joker at all.

"He's gone Rachel….." The Joker said in a soft voice that nearly broke her heart "Some things can't be saved"

Rachel felt sadness rise through her body, a weight so heavy on her chest that she felt like it was being crushed, struggling for breath Rachel sobbed, a feeling of loss forming.

Loss of what? What did she lose?

NO…. not what she had lost…what He had lost.

Feeling something in her hand that she had not noticed until this point. She looked down at it;  
it was the card, the card he left with her.  
The Jack.

Frowning Rachel went to take a better look at it but it crumbled in her hand.  
Turning into ash until there was nothing left. Tears rolled down her cheeks dripping onto the remnants of dust in the palm of her hand.

"Everything burns…" The Jokers voice said before he broke out into a fit of hysterical laughter.

Rachel jolted awake a blood curdling scream erupting from her throat as she gasped for breath that she couldn't seem to catch.

"Bad dream…Miss Dawes?" the familiar voice chuckled

Shaking, Rachel looked up at The Joker sitting on a chair watching her curiously. Rachel half expected him to still be covered in blood but he wasn't, still the same as ever, made up face like war paint and his tailor made not-so-cheap suit.  
Rachel took a shaky breath trying to steady her fast beating heart.  
Wiping the cold drops of perspiration on her brow she muttered.  
"…More like Nightmare"

* * *

_thats so weird.. seriously i had no intention of writing a dream sequence but i started typing and it was like my fingers had little minds of their owns  
But i'm quite proud of it actually... its odd and despite the fact that its quite macabre i think its still beautiful...disturbingly so.  
because even though Rachel is sickened and disgusted by The Joker, and to a certain extent does hate him she still can't seem to let go of the fact that some people cannot be saved or changed.. however sad that is  
she may always hold onto that little... hope. hence the Jack card but i think we all know deep inside...that she can't save him  
So if you worried that i'm gonna like redeem the joker and have him... like turn back into Jack well... i think its safe to say that would be...totally lame.. and unrealistic and...out of character  
However... i have more... plans. I believe that Rachel does bring out the more human and er..Jack-like side to him, hence why he left the jack card with her, just in case :) _

So ... Review Review I love reviews... hehe


	13. Chapter 13 Addiction

_woo extra long one today on account of i didn't update yesterday... i meant to but my internet decided it was going to be a bitch and wouldn't work.  
I'm...shocked at myself over this chapter. It kind of felt like i'd already typed it out before i knew what i'd typed and just turned out to be alright. eek but im worried . its only a matter of time before writers block hits me. oh dear i hope not :(  
I"m glad so many of you really liked the last chapter, hehe i am quite proud over it hehehe.  
I've been really missing Heath Ledger these last couple of days sobs so writing this has really helped me... uh honour him? sighs I miss you dude.  
ooh I also had a quite...scary Joker dream the other night i'll talk about after the chapter  
so read read read!  
Disclaimer : i do not own characters..they just own me. _

**srh420cky - **Squeee i'm glad you like the story enough to read it three times thats like... twice more motivating hehe.

**The Mischief - **ooh thank you!! I'm glad you liked it, The Jack card ahh sighs i adore that idea. its like...my baby :)

**Lonewolf77 - **the BEST Jokachel story.. .wow... thats... oh THANK YOU thats just like... handing me a million bucks ... better even. that quite possibly could be the greatest comment i've ever recieved. though.. im not sure i deserve it thanks a bunch anyway!!

**To everyone that has read and reviewed this story, i dedicate this chapter to you, because you are so completely awesome :) **

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter Thirteen : Addiction

Rachel wrapped her arms around herself tighter, desperate to stop the uncontrollable shaking that had over come her body.  
That dream….. Rachel shuddered remembering the horrifying images, replaying them in her head.

When that card crumbled in her hand, the same card that was in her hand now, when it turned into nothing but ash she couldn't describe the feeling that she felt.  
It simple terms, she felt extremely sad and helpless.

She shuddered again remembering the taste of her own blood pouring out of her mouth and the feeling of The Joker's own blood dripping on her skin and hair, mixing with her own like some wacked out blood oath.

Looking up at him now she couldn't help but see how frightening he had looked in her dream, blood all over his face and all, many people would say he looked frightening all time with his face painted the way he did but seeing him now he looked suddenly more appealing. Rachel would definitely take the face splattered in make up rather than the face splattered with blood any day.

The Joker was pacing now, walking backwards and forwards and Rachel swore that he was muttering to himself. He seemed stressed and it kind of amused her to see someone like The Joker stressed, it was abnormal.

He was supposed to be chaotic yet still oddly calm, that was what scared her about him in the first place. How anyone could be so calm after doing the terrible things that he filled his day with was impossible to imagine.

Rachel was snapped out of her thoughts when The Joker suddenly groaned clutching his side, the same side that he had his broken rib.

"You have a broken rib…. And you refuse to go to the hospital don't you think it would be a good idea to I don't know…. Sit down…sleep?" Rachel said raising her eyebrows.

The Joker rolled his eyes "Sleep is for people who are bored and don't have anything to do….I how-ever have plenty to do"

"Most people sleep…when they are tired not because they're bored" Rachel said.

"Well then…. Sleeping is for people who are tired" The Joker said sounding annoyed another thing that amused Rachel greatly.

"Fine... No sleep, but you've got to be in pain so why not sit down, I'm sure ….. Your Chaos and anarchy can be postponed for one night" Rachel laughed slight sarcasm entering her voice. 'Heaven-forbid he doesn't go out and blow things up for a night' Rachel thought.

"I haven't blown anything up in hours beautiful…… If I leave it off for a night I'll start getting with drawl symptoms… the shakes… maybe a little sickness."

"So…you're saying that you're addicted to chaos?" Rachel scoffed.

The Joker rolled his eyes again in a manner that told Rachel that he thought she was stupid  
"Have you not been listening to anything I've said Miss Dawes... Chaos…..Chaos is my heroin" He giggled.

"Right… and you can't live without it for just one night..Maybe two… while your bruising heals a bit?"

"And do what….sit here…with you" The Joker said gesturing to her

"Play cards hmm...watch a little late night telly-vision….maybe have a few glasses of wine... Get to know each other better…"

The Joker paused contemplating what he said "actually that doesn't sound so bad at all.. ooo-kay lets do that….preferably the last part what do you say Rachel, help me with my addiction?

Replace chaos and anarchy with drugs and alcohol! I mean I bet you're a real hoot, what kind of drunk are you...

the emotional drunk that can't quit with the tears ands moans and groans about how distasteful their life has become..

Or the fun drunk…?" He licked his lips and waggled his eyebrows suggestively "Say…Raaachel I'll bet you're the latter, the good girl..Who just can't help but be bad with alcohol in their bodies"

Rachel sighed "Fine…go blow things up" she mumbled standing up from her position on the floor.

The Joker giggled but his giggle turned into a painful moan when he seemed to move the wrong way.  
Clutching his side he took a few deep breaths, squeezing his eyes shut.

Rachel bit her lip, she'd never seen him like this, for once he was not laughing. It was oddly eerie.  
When he first came back from his date with Batman he had laughed, cackling through his pain now he didn't even look like he had the strength to laugh. He looked as though he was going to fall over at any minute.

"Take your shirt off" Rachel said walking towards him.

The Joker's eyes snapped open, once again twinkling with amusement.

"Raaachel…I'm flattered…... if I knew that all I had to do was get a broken rib to get to that ass kicking I would have done it myself"

Rachel sighed "Why don't I doubt that?"

"Do you have any bandages?" she added

"Did you turn off your ears when I said that this is not the first injury that I've had to endure... In the bathroom" The Joker said gesturing to the bathroom door.

Returning from the bathroom with bandages in her hand Rachel's breath caught as she was faced with a shirtless Joker. 'Oh great….this was a fabulous plan' she thought mentally slapping herself.

Clearing her throat to cover up her intake of breath she walked closer to the Joker who now was leaning against a chair with one hand, the other still clutching his battered side.

Now that she was closer Rachel could see just how bad his injury actually was, it certainly looked much worse than it did the day before, the bruise had darkened and it certainly looked painful.

Taking another step towards him she reached out to where his hand was clutched in a vice grip.  
Lifting her hands she gently moved his hands away to get a better look at his injury. She ran her fingers over the bruising. My god... Was this the type of injuries Bruce gave to all of Gotham's criminals?  
He certainly was brutal; something that Rachel was not used to associating with her old friend and love.

"Are you planning on doing anything or did you just want to see me without clothes, because I can think of much more……interesting ways to do that" The Joker said leering at her, licking his cracked red lips again.

This snapped Rachel to attention  
"Oh… uh…" Rachel said trying to remember what she was meant to be doing in the first place.

The Joker frowned slightly "What…did you forget how to talk... What a shame I love our little chats…they are like…rays of sunshine on my cloudy days" he said his face a picture of seriousness, so serious in fact that Rachel nearly laughed.

"Ha….ha…. you're hilarious" she said forcing her voice into a bored and sarcastic tone.

The Joker giggled "I try"

Gesturing to the chair that he was currently leaning on Rachel told The Joker to sit down, kneeling so she was eye level with his torso.  
Wow.. His torso.. like a map of past injuries, he wasn't lying when he said that he'd had practice with this kind of thing.  
There were many different scars scattered along his skin, how many times had this man been battered and broken and sewn back together?

"Don't Move" Rachel said, placing the bandage around his torso.  
The Joker groaned as Rachel put a little too much pressure on his rib as she started bandaging his body.

"..You might…try being gentle-err….seeing as my body currently looks like I've been run over by a truck….well not so far off… your precious Bats hits like a truck"

"Stop moving around so much then!" Rachel said frustrated "God you're like a 6 year old, can't you sit still just for a minute!"

There was silence for a minute.

"…You need to work on your bed side manner Nurse Rachel"

Rachel groaned as she continued wrapping his body, this man was really starting to get on her nerves.  
It was like when he was around he was the most frustrating, awful, disgusting and yet still alluring thing but when he wasn't around she could do nothing but think about what would happen when he was around again, like some kind of addiction!.

An addiction? Was that what this was turning into for her? Rachel felt her insides twist at this disturbing thought Was he her heroin?

It wasn't as if she needed him or anything. But she hadn't lived without his daily visits either.

His daily mental abuse, It was as if he was putting thoughts into her head, making her feel and see things from his point of view, making him look that little less like a monster, making her feel that little more detached from reality, from her life as assistant D.A Rachel Dawes, girlfriend… no.. soon to be fiancé of Harvey Dent.  
That life seemed so far away.

What was he doing to her?

Rachel suddenly felt the Joker's gaze on her and she lifted her head so she could look him in the face.

He was smiling cruelly down at her like he knew exactly what she was thinking. It made her head hurt.

Looking at his face, she suddenly imagined it splattered with blood again, just like in her dream as he was looking down at her encasing her in his arms.

They were so close right now, why hadn't she realized exactly how close they were until now, too busy thinking about how annoying he was to realize that she was staring at his…naked chest… oh god.

The Joker's mocking laugh echoed in the room forcing her eyes back to his once more.

"How… Int-er-esting" he said. "My my….Miss Dawes what would your boyfriend say?"

"What are you talking about…?" Rachel said confusion evident. what did this have to with Harvey?

"Well…here we are...Alone…me without clothes…you in my clothes" He said gesturing to the clothes she was currently wearing "…the clothes that I provided …..The ones that you're practically drooling on at the mo-ment"

Rachel felt her cheeks burn blushing a scarlet red as she realized that he had noticed her staring at his bare skin.  
"I wasn't drooling" Rachel growled out angrily.

The Joker just laughed more, to Rachel it sounded like he was laughing at her, wasn't he always? Was she really that amusing to him?

"HAHaaa, Oh Beautiful……you're cute when you blush…red….like blood" he said his voice tinged with laughter yet still managing to be dark.

Lifting his fingers to her cheek as if to smear the imaginary blood over her skin, once again making Rachel flash back to her dream, She shuddered again remembering their skin against each other, their blood smearing and dripping, Tasting his as she buried her head in the crook of his neck, tasting the warmth of his body as it melded against hers like they were being molded together.

Rachel felt her breath quicken as the thoughts entered her head, oh so disgusting.. So wrong and somehow that made it even more perfect… perfectly messed up and perfectly broken.

Rachel ached for more, just to be able to touch more of his skin. It was like pain building in the pit of her stomach, a pain begging her to just give in…give in give in give in give in … let go let go let go!

The Joker still had that damn smile on his face, teasing her like he knew exactly what was welling up inside the pit of her stomach, or the pain that was welling up inside her heart.

After all that's what was going to be in pain in the end anyway, her heart, if she continued to do this she knew how it would end, her heart torn into pieces and sewn together only to be torn up again, and she'd keep doing this she knew it.

Every time he touched her, still smiling evilly, knowing how much he was winning their game, he was enjoying it.  
But was this simply a game now?

Rachel felt her chest tighten as pulled her closer, wedged in between his legs so she was against his skin.

He was laughing…. Oh my god he was actually laughing at her situation. And the sound only seemed to add to the feeling inside; it was like he was thickening the air surrounding them.  
Her fingers were still spread out across his torso leaving finger nail marks indented in his pale skin.

Why couldn't she catch her breath?

The Joker ran his fingers along her cheek, his fingernails leaving red marks, it sent her small tingles of pain as he dug his nails into her skin but the pain only made her whimper for more.

She looked into his eyes as they now silently laughed at her, always laughing even when his broken mouth was closed he was still laughing.  
'Everything is always a joke' her own voice echoed in her head.

As he clutched her hair in his fists yanking her to him he lightly ran his tongue over the skin of her chin.  
The feeling made Rachel feel as if she was falling, into nothingness, eternal darkness like the dream-world she was in the night before.  
Was this a dream?  
If it was she didn't want to wake up.  
No… she could stay in this nightmare forever, clutching onto this creature that had crawled his way inside her.

Then his lips were on hers, and his tongue was against hers, pushing and probing and his mouth was stealing her breath.  
She kissed him back running her fingers over his skin, his warm skin that felt like it was burning her and freezing her at the same time.

She could taste him, that horrible wrong and incredible taste that made Rachel want more.

The kiss turned violent when Rachel pulled him down closer to her clutching his hair, trying to get as close to him as possible so that maybe she could crawl her way inside him like he'd done to her.  
She kissed him like he was her life-line, her addiction.

The Joker half giggled, half groaned into her mouth obviously amused and aroused at Rachel's enthusiasm.  
The need for air soon became a problem as Rachel felt her self get light-headed and pulled back breathing heavily.

The Joker was smiling, his blood red mouth smudged more than usual, he leaned forward pressing a kiss to her nose he giggled before whispering  
"I win"

It suddenly felt like Rachel had finally smashed into the ground from falling all that way.  
That creep… Rachel gasped feeling violently sick.

She'd let him do it again, and she felt herself shaking as she pulled away from him.  
The Joker only laughed more when she punched him as hard as she could.

"Aw you're so spunky… I like it" he said giggling.

Rachel felt the skin of her knuckles bruised and broken and pain radiated all the way up her arm as she stood and ran to the bathroom.

Slamming the door behind her Rachel could still hear The Joker laughing from outside the door, but she had no plans to go back out there anytime soon.  
She looked at herself in the mirror, red and white makeup had been smudged across her face and she felt the burning sensation of stomach acid work its way up her throat. Swallowing hard she closed her eyes willing her mirror image to just disappear.

Was she pissed at him about what he'd done to her again, hell yes!

But what she was angry at most was the fact that she was perhaps even more to blame for it.  
She kissed him back, and she enjoyed it, there was no denying that and god help her she wanted to do it again. She needed more……. She felt her fingers tremble as she touched her lips aching to feel his again.

She was going to get burned; she knew it, the saying if you play with fire you're bound to get burned echoed in her mind. But The Joker was an inferno, and she was already burning, and was just going to be 

left charred. She could try and stay away from him as long as she could, hide away in the bathroom, but as long as she was isolated from the real world enclosed with him, sooner or later she would need a fix.

* * *

_well i hope you liked it  
I'm a little unsure but i'm okay with it :)_

_now to my dream eeeek  
It was...horrible  
I had a dream that The Joker cut my mouth open.. like his glasgow smile and all.  
when he was cutting my mouth open it wasn't painful but...terrifying because i could feel my flesh being pulled apart.  
Then ... after a while it seemed they healed and i looked in the mirror and i had the same scars as him  
of course by this time i was screaming in horror.. then all of a sudden there was a can of coke in my hand and i threw it at him and was all like "YOU BUTCHERED MY FACE YO ASSHOLE!"  
and.. he just laughed.  
then i woke up but it was so vivid that i had to turn on the light and check the mirror that i didn't have the scars  
shudders creeeepy.  
_

anyway i'll update soon!.  
and review dudes.


	14. Chapter 14 Changing

_Hi waves thanks for the reviews friends, I appreciate it more than words can ever truly express, they are like bright rainbows on Jack's painfull dreary heart. hehe Fight Club reference for the day... check._

anywho. enjoy. chapter too tired to write any more boring authors note.  
Disclaimer : I am lame-ass fangirl attempting at being creative :) do not own anything but the plot thats all me yal!  


* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter Fourteen - Changing

The Joker giggled as he heard Rachel slam the bathroom door in a fashion that could only be described as extremely pissed off.  
He liked her when she got pissed off, she was so much more fun... maybe even more fun that Batman himself...? ah... nah.

He didn't know exactly why or what it was but something about making her incredibly angry was very amusing to him.  
He couldn't help but giggle again as he remembered the look in her eyes as he nearly sucked her face off, he had completely lured her in that was for sure, The Joker was sure had he done more than kiss her she wouldn't have complained at all.  
But that face afterwards and that punch, hehah! It didn't hurt him at all; her little fists were probably hurting much more than his already bruised face.

'How cute' he thought laughing to himself.

It was spare of the moment when he started up this little game with Rachel Dawes but he was enjoying it so much that it wasn't something that he could see himself dropping now.  
She was extremely annoying at times …but despite how much he hated her at times he also found a lot of pleasure in annoying her right back. Ahh feel the love in that relationship.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rachel stood in front of the mirror; she'd decided that she needed a shower, to wash away every trace of _him _from her.  
He made her feel so dirty, it made her feel sick.  
Sick but oh so alive.  
Rachel shook her head ridding herself of those thoughts.

She stared at herself in the mirror, she'd been here for days now and if someone told her last week that she would be The Joker's hostage, that they would be playing mind games and that she would be lusting after him sexually and emotionally she would of probably laughed in their face, yet here she was in that exact dilemma.

Life could change so quickly, it could end just as fast which reminded her why she had decided to agree to Harvey's proposal.  
Harvey, that incredible man who she had betrayed, what would he think if he ever found out what she had done, and with The Joker of all people!  
What was he doing at this moment anyway?

'Probably looking for me…' Rachel thought feeling sadness well up inside 'he's looking for me because he loves me………….and meanwhile…I'm making out with The Joker'  
Saying that line in her head, Rachel frowned

Making out with The Joker?

It just sounded so wrong and so not what they were doing. yes they were making out if you put it into technical terms but she'd never felt like that with anyone else, that feeling within, if you just let go for one tiny second then that person would disappear and you'd never feel or touch them again, burning a hole inside that would never heal.

Rachel frowned, it was an odd feeling, and she was probably reading to much into it anyway.

Rachel felt her stomach rumble and the familiar feeling of hunger came over her again, the last thing she'd eaten was that darn burger; she wondered if The Joker would bring her anymore food soon, she really didn't fancy starving. She also didn't fancy leaving the bathroom afraid of that mocking smile that would be present on his face.

'I win…." Rachel thought angrily 'I WIN?? Ugh'

Rachel sighed, She'd had enough she wanted to go home, would she have trouble looking Harvey in the eyes, probably but it was better than spending one more insane, confusingly addictive moment in The Joker's company. She wanted out!

'Cold turkey all the way baby' she thought to herself before bracing herself to walk back out, after all she couldn't stay in here forever she'd already spent a few hours hiding away.  
For now she had to deal with the fact that she was going to be close to him, but hopefully not for too much longer. She wished that Bruce would hurry up and rescue her.

When Rachel walked out of the room she decided that she was going to ignore him straight way, he was sitting there shirt and vest now on leaning against the wall smirking at her.  
That was it, look the other way Rachel he's not even there.

Turning her head away from him Rachel walked over to the Chair that he had occupied before and sat down looking in the complete opposite direction than the Joker.

She wasn't going to give him the satisfaction that he got to her, no way...and besides Rachel was sure that if she looked at him she would fall again.

"Say…Rachel, No hard feelings right" she heard The Joker say.

But she did not answer.

"….First it was talking and now you're deaf too……… I guess you won't mind if I sing then, I've always wanted to be a singer, my mommy always said I had such talent"

There was a pause as he waited for Rachel to cut in again with a snide remark about his singing voice or about his Mommy.

But she was silent. She wanted to say something that was for sure, more like please... Do...Not...Sing.

"Ahh… I see….. You're giving me the silent treatment" The Joker said.

Rachel rolled her eyes.

"I guess that means….there is hard feelings between….._us_" The Joker sighed over dramatically.

Still Rachel ignored him.

"Raachel……… some people would say holding a grudge against someone for no reason is wrooong" He said.

That did it Rachel turned around sending a thousand daggers in his direction with her eyes, oh she hated this clown!

"No Reason?!...'I WIN'………. I WIN?" Rachel yelled her voice hysterical.

"…I don't know if you remember… but technically I win" The Joker said smile widening showing rows of yellow teeth.

Rachel scoffed "It wasn't like I had any say whether I wanted to participate in this sick game of yours, I don't understand…. What was your plan….To make me crazy...to make me ….._Want _you… if so ….well congratulations YOU DID WIN!"

Rachel said the words before she could even think.  
Her eyes widened and her mouth hung open in shock, she admitted it to someone other than herself, she said the words aloud, in the open, and of all people she said it straight to the person she was supposed to be avoiding, oh great.

His grin widened even further, if possible and a cackle erupted from the throat of her captor.

"Well….isn't this an int-er-rresting development in our….relationship" he said through his giggles, only making Rachel angrier.

Standing up from her position on the chair she walked over to where the Joker was currently 'lounging'.  
He was looking up at her from his position on the ground, looking totally at ease and extremely amused at Rachel's anger, which as it happened made her even angrier!

"Its your fault!...and I think it was kind of obvious because I kissed you…..god knows why I did but I did….there for implying that I might…..have wanted to……and we don't have a relationship!" She said through gritted teeth.

"Yeaaah that was kind of obvious Miss Dawes…I just hadn't expected you to admit it" The Joker said grinning like Cheshire cat. "and of course we have a relationship…… filled with hatred more than love however some would still …uh consider it some form of relations"

Rachel screamed making The Joker's eyes widen in surprise and his eyebrows rise up into his receding hair line.

"Random screaming is not considered well for your health Rachel; you might want to tone it down …just a notch, those neighbours of mine….tsk tsk…. They would have my head if I keep making too much noise"

"…OH my God….. What is the matter with you… despite the mass murdering part; did your mother drop you on your head as a child?" She yelled unable to control her anger.

The Joker paused "Actually it was my father" gesturing with his hands as if he was drinking "….. He was a drinker"

Rachel's eyes narrowed not sure what to make of the story, exactly how many pasts did The Joker have?

"Do you have short term memory loss or something…. How many pasts do you have… because if all the things you've told me while I've been here actually did happen to you… then no wonder you are so screwed up!"

The Joker smirked "…I prefer my past to be….multiple choice… and the truth is I've told my story a different way so many different times I can't quite remember which is the truth anymore" giggling he added "hmm… maybe it _was _mother who dropped me on my head when I was an infant"

Rachel scoffed shaking her head in disbelief "…..You're unbelievable"

"I know…… no one forgets these babies" he said licking his lips.

Rachel couldn't help but let a laugh escape but coughed to try and stop it from being noticeable.

"Stop trying to be dazzling Joker…It's not a good look on you" she said mockingly.

The Joker looked momentarily hurt "It comes naturally too me…..its part of my…bad boy charm"

"Yeah…. Well I was never really into the bad boys" Rachel said smiling thinking of Harvey.

"……..All women love the bad boys Miss. Dawes, it's just in their nature...They can't help themselves!"

"Not me" She said quietly shaking her head.

"Really….? Then…. Tell me Rachel what was that little….dev-elope-ment that occurred on that chair over there?" The Joker said pointing the chair behind her, his eyes never leaving hers.

Rachel felt her whole body stiffen because deep inside she knew he was right, at least a little bit.

Was it the bad boy charm that attracted her to him in the first place? The danger, that rush she got when ever he touched her because she knew that he could end her life at any moment… or was it because most bad boys were damaged, and The Joker was completely damaged….all the kings horses and all the kings men would never be able to bit him back together again that was for sure.

Rachel couldn't look at his eyes any longer; they were starring at her knowingly, as if they knew all the secrets to her soul, it made her dizzy.

"Don't be embarrassed Beautiful….like I said Women just can't help themselves" he said standing up from his sitting position.

Before she knew it Rachel felt the weight of The Joker's body pressed against her from behind.  
His hands wrapping around her waist pulling her closer to his body.  
She could feel the warmth of his body and Rachel couldn't help but melt into it, desperate to get a little closer.

Rachel felt her head drop back onto his shoulder, her body almost feeling completely uncontrollable.  
She could feel the rumble of his chest as he chuckled against her.

"Times...They are a changing" he whispered in a sing-song voice into her ear.

Rachel couldn't find her voice, and her retort came out in nothing but a squeak.  
The Joker laughed his lips against her cheek  
"like… a mouse squeak…squeak" he whispered

'How was it possible for him to make even that sound sadistic?' Rachel thought absentmindedly

Rachel felt herself shiver as The Joker stepped away from her taking the warmth with him. Pulling his coat on walking towards the door Rachel finally managed to talk

"Where are you going" she said trying not to make it sound like she cared too much.

The Joker smirked "Well… unless there's someone else in this room, I'm sure that's your stomach making grotesque gurgling noises... So I'm going to acquire you some edible objects"

Rachel blushed a little as her stomach gurgled at the mention of food…. Oh sweet Jesus glorious food!  
The Joker giggled before exiting leaving Rachel standing alone in the room feeling hungry and extremely confused about the events of the day, she couldn't remember if she was angry at him or herself anymore.

"Times...They are a changing" Rachel whispered to herself, oh they certainly were.

* * *

_ugh... dudes... I'm sorry man. lack of sleep equals not so great chapters. Hopefully after a full night rest the next chapter will be much better._

In the immortal words of The Joker...or well more accurately Bob Dylan  
Times...They are a changin'!!  
yES THATS RIGHT ... this is beginning of the turning point in the story where the dynamic will begin to shift.  
I wont give too much away just that... ... The Joker and Rachels time together... in isolation is rapidly drawing to a close!!  
hehe how exciting!  
anyway as usual I'll update soon  
i really will.. probably tomorrow seeing as i have no life.  
don't forget to review on your way out!  



	15. Chapter 15 Rescue

well here we _are again for another fun chapter of Jokachel lurrrve _:)  
_this one took me all bloody day to get to a point where i was satisfied with it ugh  
Damn The Joker is extremely stressful to write... which is why i feel he's beginning to get a little ooc.. .or maybe its just me. ..or maybe this is just a wonderful excuse to go see The Dark Knight for a fourth time hehe...  
anyways here is chapter 15 hope you enjoy dear friends!  
_

**RobertChaseICU - **oh i'm glad that my story is helping you feel better!... Im suffering from Depression too actually at the moment. it sucks but i'm glad something small i've done has helped you feel better.. than in itself helps me feel better :)

**amethystdecember - **HEH i'm glad you liked that line... i lol'd a little at it myself :) but then again i'm a loser that always laughs at my own jokes when everyone else is stone face..like buster keaton xD i'm glad that you don't think my fic sucks!

**Aeropostale Fanatic - **oh man oh man... i was never going to have Rachel killed off in my story anyway... so you don't have to worry about that. thanks for the review.

**THANKS FOR THE REVIEWS DROOGY'S **

disclaimer : I do not own... i have no life i just write fanfic

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**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME **

Chapter fifteen : Rescue

Rachel looked out of the window into the darkening city of Gotham.

The sun was setting, sending beautiful rays of golden light across the sky.  
It was gorgeous, one tiny ray of beauty in the sometimes very cruel world.

Rachel always liked sunsets ever since she was a little girl, she remembered those days where she would force Bruce to watch them with her at Wayne manor.

Smiling at the memory Rachel imagined that she was a little girl again playing with Bruce. A time when nothing else mattered, before the harsh realities of the world had fully touched her innocent eyes.

Sometimes she wished that she could turn the clock back and revert back to that young child who didn't understand how horrible people could really be, that young child didn't have to deal with the things that she did now and sometimes it all just seemed too much.

The Joker had been gone for hours leaving her alone, plenty of time to contemplate the goings on of her life and her current predicament.  
It gave her a lot of time to really think about the things that she had been taking for granted.  
Her relationship with Harvey being very close to number one on her list.

Rachel winced as her mind wandered to her Harvey, her heart hurt every time his face appeared in her mind. She felt bad about the things that had been going on with The Joker.  
Harvey was beginning to become all she could think of as she was left alone to think.  
In the last few days she had started to forget all about the person she loved most in her life and all because of a man who was simply playing a game with her head!

Reality seemed so far away when she was locked away, being kept prisoner by the villain of the fairytale.  
Who would be the hero to save her? would it be Batman, the protector who watches over Gotham scaring away all the hidden monsters under people's bed, or Harvey, her love coming to her rescue to carry her back to their castle where they would of course get married and be together forever?  
Rachel really didn't mind seeing either of them at that moment. They were the two most important people in her life.

The two people she loved most and it was like they were completely wiped from her mind every time The Joker decided he'd like to inhabit her personal space, which was pretty much any time he was in the room!

Rachel shuddered, cringing to herself, how did she let him get under her skin again? Ugh.  
She couldn't stand this cold place any more. Everything was cold and cruel just like The Joker, she wanted that love, happiness and warmth back, she wanted Harvey.

"Penny for your thoughts Miss. Dawes" The Joker's voice said from behind her.  
Jumping slightly Rachel turned around only to gasp in horror, her hand flying to her mouth.

He looked worse than he did the other night, no doubt another run in with Batman?  
There was blood running from his mouth and Rachel felt her stomach churn, nausea making her head spin , blood splattered on his face, just like in her dream.

She didn't know why but her eyes instantly ran over his body in inspection of any other serious injuries that would need attention quickly, luckily there were none, but his face was definitely a mess but she couldn't tell if it was all his blood….or someone else's .

What if he'd hurt someone…what if it was Batman that he'd had a run in with or Harvey, had he made a mess of Harvey's handsome face, ripping holes in the skin of his cheeks, the same cheeks that her own fingers had caressed?

"What the hell happened to you?" Rachel shrieked, her voice bordering on hysterical.

"Well…. you see… I had a little run in with someone's fist…… your precious Harvey to be exact" He said wiping some of the dripping blood from his mouth.

Rachel's eyes widened "Harvey...Did this to you"

"Yeaaah….I might of deserved it seeing as I may have…..an-tag-an-ised him…just… a little... tiny bit" The Joker giggled cheerfully "He's so touchy….especially when it comes to…. His precious distressing damsel"

Rachel rolled her eyes "Don't you ever learn… or do you _like_ getting beaten to a pulp?"

"aahh….some would say I have a learning…disability" he said.

Rachel tried to block out the battered red mess on his face, also trying to erase the haunting images of her dream from her mind, but it seemed like they were etched into her retinas

"Well… is Harvey alright?" Rachel asked suddenly worried about what The Joker mind of done to him probably just to get back at her.

"Don't worry …..Your little Harvey-kins is intact" The Joker chuckled innocently before adding "aren't you worried about me! I'm the one with the horrifying wounds!"

Rachel glared at him "You probably deserved it"  
The Joker paused as if thinking about what she said, "Touché…. ".

"What happened?" Rachel asked after a moment or two of silence. Anything to do with Harvey was something that she would appreciate knowing about.

"…..Well Rachel… he of course wanted to know where I'd stashed you……. So I warn you now… I think your stay at the house of Joker is rapidly drawing to …..A close"

Rachel felt her eyes widen and her face light up at The Joker's words.  
"You mean... You told him where I was?"

The Joker burst out in laughter, large gasps of amusement that echoed through the room  
"ha….. Where would be the fun in that! That would be just like… like… handing the dog the bone.. no no I simply told them to go….fetch".

Frowning Rachel through her hands up in frustration "I don't know what that means…. You what...Gave those clues?"

"ahh.. yeaaah" The Joker giggled happily.

Rachel felt her whole body relax instantly, it wouldn't be long until they found her and she could get out of this place, then perhaps admit her self into Arkham for her current mental status.  
There was no other cause for doing all the things that she'd been doing other than temporary insanity!

She couldn't help but let a smile break out on her face.

"Don't look too happy Rachel…. I might get offended"

Rachel scoffed "Yeah because you've been such a wonderful person, opening up your home to me like this…really thank you"  
The Joker only laughed more, the sounds coming from his scarred mouth making the hairs on Rachel's arms stand on end, it almost sounded like fingers running down a chalk board.

Taking a slow step towards her in a teasing manner he raised his hand gently tapping Rachel on the nose.  
"Oh… Raaachel... You've come such a long waay…. You've learned the art of Smiling, Joking and sarcasm" he said mock pride filling his voice.

Rachel took a step back, she didn't want him to be any closer to her, she was going to be going home soon she didn't want to fall under his spell again, and he being in such close proximity to her was not going to help matters at all.

"Why did you tell them clues anyway" Rachel said her voice quivering slightly as The Joker took another step towards her smiling.  
"Miss Dawes… It's not like I don't…. _love_ your company but I can't have you here forever"

Before Rachel knew it she was backed against the wall, The Joker towering over her in a haunting way that made her feel so very small.  


"So why did you hold me captive in the first place" she said forcing her voice to be strong despite the fact that her lungs felt deprived of air.

The Joker's bloodied mouth widened, his scars stretching out in mocking grin. He leaned towards her and Rachel could feel his hair brush against her forehead and cheek tickling her slightly.

"If I told you the answer to that question it would be …. Cheating…. But then again I was never one for following the rules……. You see….. you, Sweat Pea are…the key to The Batman's identity…and heart, I wave you around his face on a string, he's bound to come running, fists a-blazing….just ask my rib!" he giggled blowing his warm breath on her face.

Rachel felt sparks of electricity burn through her body, running all the way through her fingertips.  
Shaking she managed to whisper  
"You're going kill him?"

"haha! Oooh… Beautiful… I don't want to kill Batsy… Why would I want to kill him…he's just too much fun to play with"

"Everything's a game" Rachel said in realization.

All this, keeping her here, all to get under Batman's skin to tease him. Of course, typical,

'Everything is always a joke' her inner voice cackled in her head sounding disturbingly like The Joker.

The Joker leaned forward so his face brushed hers the blood from his mouth dripping onto her skin.  
Rachel gasped smelling the warm rusty smell of blood waft into her nostrils and winced as she felt The Joker's blood smear across her cheek.  
Everything was so similar and she began to feel her legs tremble, struggling to hold her weight. She felt sick to her stomach; this was all so much like her dream.

Groaning she felt her legs start to buckle but was held up by The Joker's hands grasping her shoulders pinning her to the wall.

"Let me go" She protested trying to break free of the Joker's firm grasp.

"Why would I do that when we're having such a good time, you know Rachel our time together is running out, we should….savor every…last taste hmm?" he said darkly.

"Please" she whispered desperately feeling the will to fight drift out of her….just like in her dream.  
'Please….. God stop me' she thought desperation filling her.

"Please…._Please... "_The Joker mocked staring into her eyes, Rachel could never stare into his eyes for too long so she squeezed them shut hoping that everything would fall away.

Suddenly Rachel felt the sharp tip of a blade on her cheek  
"Come on come on Raaachel open those pretty blue eyes….look at me" he growled digging the blade in her skin.

The way he said it, Rachel couldn't help but open her eyes and stare into his.  
She felt the blade on her cheek, slowly cutting into her flesh but the pain seemed delayed because the tingles that were currently radiating through her face was pain mixed with pleasure going straight to her core.

The Joker licked his lips before running the blade of his knife down her cheek to her throat.  
"Wouldn't it be….ironic if batman races against time….to save his…love and only comes here to realize that its too late, she's already been …bled dry…… lying on the ground maybe still suffocate-ing on her ….own…. bah-lud"

Rachel whimpered as the blade dug into her throat sending blood running over her skin dripping into the material of her clothes.  
This was it; he was going to kill her. He was just keeping her alive to have fun with her and now he was going to stick that blade in her throat and laugh while she bled to death!

Rachel knew the danger, somewhere in the deep caverns of her mind she knew that this would probably be the last few minutes of her life and she should have been more afraid than she probably was.  
But the fear and the pain was falling away under the heated yet still amused eyes of her captor.. Her addiction.

"Oops...I've made a mess" The Joker said bending his head he licked the trail of blood from the knife wound on her neck.  
Rachel didn't know how to react; she felt the trail of saliva from the Joker's tongue lick away the blood and she knew she should feel grossed out but all she could feel was the jolts of electricity.

Then he was gone and there was nothing holding her weight any longer, Rachel felt the room tilt slightly as she slid to the floor.  
a dark shadow had entered the room pulling the The Joker from his position against her. Bruce was here hidden under that mask.

"Honey…. We have a visitor" The Joker laughed hysterically as Batman landed a punch to his face.

Rachel flinched as the she heard the sounds of breaking flesh, she watched on with horror and an odd fascination as her masked friend lifted the still cackling Joker from his position on the floor and launched him into a wall all the while The Joker's laugh continued.

Rachel couldn't help but scream as she watched the brutal fight.

"Look at you go!" The Joker growled.

She couldn't handle it anymore when an agonizing scream came from The Joker as he was dealt a sickening blow to his broken rib.

"Stop it!"

She could feel the beginnings of tears begin to well in her eyes at the ferociousness of the attack, this was not the man she'd known her entire life, this wasn't Bruce.

And it scared her that she felt the unusual feeling of protectiveness over a man that she swore was about to kill her a few minutes before.

Bruce stopped, and turned around to look at Rachel his face surprised that Rachel had stopped him from beating the man who had held her captive for nearly a week.

"Rachel….?" His gruff voice questioned.

Suddenly more people were in the room, Rachel knew that there were police officers in the room yelling and ordering The Joker to get up and put his hands behind his back.  
She knew that Bruce was still looking at her oddly; she knew that Gordon was there and she knew that Harvey would be waiting for her.

But nothing mattered because her gaze was still fixed on The Joker; his faces contorted in pain and still a sick smile present on his face.

Their eyes never left each other as he was forced to his feet.  
His hollow eyes boring into hers, she felt the tears that had been welling up trickle down her pale cheeks.  
"Miss Dawes…it's been a pleasure" he said before the officers walked him out of the room.

Suddenly she felt the weight of the last few days crash down upon her like a pile of bricks.  
Feeling her vision go blurry and the room begin to tilt she collapsed to the ground blackness overtaking her consciousness.

* * *

_AND RACHEL IS RESCUED _

dun dun dun...  
_but the stockholm syndrome is already set.. so this is by no means any where near the end of the story  
so ... review review review and i'll update update update :)  
_


	16. Chapter 16 Secret

_Hey guys, thanks for the reviews!  
I won't lie, i do feel really insecure about my writing, i never feel its very good but your reviews to help me ... and they give me the confidence to post because otherwise i just wouldn't post at all :)  
So thanks a lot  
here we are. for chapter 16 i can't believe we are at 16 already.. how my baby's grown so fast!_

Disclaimer : I do not own any of this except the plot.  


* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter Sixteen : Secret

Shards of light seem to flicker behind closed lids, beckoning her to come out.  
But the comfort of being in the darkness, the odd warmth of it was telling Rachel otherwise.

No… no she didn't want to leave yet, in the warm darkness she felt alive, when she opened her eyes would she feel dead again?  
She didn't want to open her eyes and return back to reality right now. The peaceful darkness of sleep was what she wanted to keep.

'No…. let me stay' she thought, desperate to hold onto that drifting piece of darkness.  
But it was too late, she could hear the muffled voice that was turning into a blurry image calling out to her, pulling her out of the beautiful tranquility of her unconsciousness……….. Stupid muffled blurry man she thought bitterly moaning as the blinding light attacked her eyes.

Squinting she tried to make out the figure standing over her bed…. Wait bed?  
Why the hell was she in a bed!

"Hey… sleeping beauty…you awake?" the figure said in a voice that could only be described as loving.

She recognized that voice…from where…? The blurry image soon cleared up until she was faced with a man...a man she knew. _Oh_!

"Harvey!" Rachel gasped her voice slightly raspy due to her dry throat.

Harvey's face broke out in a wide smile,  
"Hey" he said bending over to kiss her forehead.

"What happened…?" Rachel asked in confusion looking around what she guessed was a hospital room. Rachel sniffed, the off smell that always lingered in hospitals surrounding her.

"You don't remember" Harvey asked curiously taking a seat beside her bed.  
Rachel shook her head

"Batman came in to find The Joker with a knife to your throat, kicked his ass then the police got there, took him away, I was on my way in, came in just in time to see you tumble to the ground" he said chuckling slightly.

"Oh..." Rachel mumbled. The Joker… was receiving quite a thrashing if she remembered correctly. She shuddered remembering the almost heart wrenching yell of pain that came from his mouth, it was haunting but it was becoming just A distant echo in her mind.

"..Where is he now… The Joker?"

"In custody…. For now anyway. I was talking to Gordon they say he'll probably end up in a padded room in Arkham" Harvey said in relief.  
"I'm just glad... that we've finally got him off the streets"

Rachel nodded absentmindedly, but her mind was really imagining The Joker's laughing face as he was locked inside that room…just waiting for his chance to escape… to come back…for her, to dig that knife a little deeper into the flesh of her neck, finishing the job this time as he watched and savored each drop of blood that fled from her shriveling body.

"Rachel…!" Harvey's worried voice broke into her thoughts as he gently shook her shoulders trying to grab her attention.

Rachel faced Harvey, his face looking as worried as he sounded  
"Hmm?"

"You were shaking… are you sure you're alright?" he asked

Rachel scoffed chuckling slightly blowing it off "I'm fine . . . Harvey really... I just zoned out... I'll be fine"

Harvey didn't look convinced his eyes telling her exactly what he was feeling.

She always could read him so well. His eyes really were like windows into his soul. Open and warm and loving, his intentions always so clear… not hidden like _his._

His hands had entwined with hers and Rachel couldn't help but smile, oh she'd missed this.

"You really had me scared Rach...Don't ever do that again" He chuckled nervously, gently caressing her hand with his.

Rachel smiled, gently touching his cheek

"Well… I'll try but I can't guarantee it" she said laughing.

Harvey joined in laughing "Well unless there are more crazy homicidal clowns on the loose I think you're in the clear"

Before Rachel even thought about the impact the words coming out of her mouth would have she blurted out  
"He's not crazy..."

Rachel's eyes widened and she felt the beginnings of a serious stuttering mess work its way up her throat, oops.

Harvey frowned, his eyes narrowing in confusion, he looked shocked and confused and unsure about what just came out of Rachel's mouth and she was sure that at any moment he was going to question her, 'quick save yourself!' Rachel thought.

"..I... I mean… he's crazy… obviously... But he's n-not crazy in a _crazy_ way... He's…more…insane...Than….uh... Crazy" she stuttered anxiously holding her breath.

Harvey's frown only deepened

"There's a difference between them?" he asked chuckling slightly.

Rachel couldn't help but let a little smile form at the corner of her mouth,

"Some people seem to think so" She said softy and was shocked and slightly angered with herself when it came out in an almost affectionate tone.  
Thankfully Harvey not knowing that 'People' meant The Joker, seemed to let it pass.

Rachel let out a shaky breath and decided a change in subject would be appropriate, hoping that she could keep her mouth shut and not let out anything that would make Harvey suspicious about exactly how close she got to the Joker at her stay at his…'humble' home.

She shuddered and felt sick even thinking about how he would react if he knew her secret.  
An image of Harvey's grief stricken face flickered in her mind, absolute disgust written on every feature and his eyes, those normally filled with warmth and love were looking at her like she was no better than The Joker himself, that The Joker really had yanked her down to his level….. No he could never know.

"So… How long was I out?" Rachel asked pulling her mind away from the horrible thoughts.

"Just a few hours" Harvey answered softly, running his hands through her matted locks.

"When can I go home?" She asked hopefully.

"The Doctors want to keep you in over night... Just for precaution"

Rachel sighed in frustration, she'd been locked away in a disgusting old dilapidated building for days with nothing to go to sleep on but the uncomfortable floor, no clothes except the clothes The Joker gave her, and god knows where he got those and nothing to eat but a burger  
All Rachel wanted now was to forget about everything and just crawl into her bed and sleep for a week.  
Her stomach growled ferociously or maybe something to eat first?

"But I'm fine. Harvey I don't need to stay here…this bed should go to someone who's actually sick" Rachel said determined to get her way.

Harvey laughed, smiling his beautiful smile, Rachel's favourite of his smiles.  
The smile where it was so wide that it almost reached his eyes, the smile where the laugh lines crinkled around his eyes.  


"I told the doctor's that you're stubborn and would fight to get out of here…. Probably would have to tie you to the bed just to keep you here!" he laughed affectionately.

Rachel nodded her head in agreement unable to wipe the grin off her face "You know me so well Harvey Dent".

Harvey only laughed more before lifting her hand from the side of the bed and kissing it softly.  
Rachel felt the same tingles she always felt whenever Harvey touched her, that slightly giddy feeling that warmed her from within.  
Only now, it was different. Why was it different?

There was that beautiful feeling still, yes that beautiful feeling still remained and the love that she felt for Harvey, that pure love was still there but the feeling seemed different, it seemed off to her now.

There wasn't that inferno burning her and eating away at her insides, there wasn't that feeling of total loss of control, there wasn't the feeling that if you just let go, you'd loose them forever.  
Had she ever felt that with Harvey?

Looking into Harvey's eyes Rachel felt sadness tear at her heart, but she had to hide it, she had to keep it a secret. She couldn't hurt him. Whatever she was feeling would go away in time, it was just lingering emotions put into her head by The Joker, it was just a game, he knew exactly how to get to her, and now that they were away from each other she could move on with her life, her life with Harvey.

Rachel sat up in her bed so she was closer to him; trying to hide the growing tears in her eyes she threw her arms around him burying her head in the crook of his neck, trying to stifle the sob that was threatening to escape.

"I love you" She said her voice shaky with her emotion.  
"I love you too"

"I'm sorry" Rachel whispered inaudible to the man she was holding. "I'm so sorry".

* * *

_soo Rachel feeling a little guilty.. well ... she kinda should feel guilty right? making out with evil killer clowns.. tsk tsk  
LOL  
NO Jokachel sexy time in this chapter and its quite short i know. but you know what they say you separate two people for a while it only EXPLODES when you get them back together... hopefully within the next few chapters that will occur... the explosions that is.  
once again thanks for the reviews and uh...give me more! i'm greedy :)_


	17. Chapter 17 Escape

_Maaaaan! this one was a toughy.  
i'm getting really frustrated when it comes to ways to describe the joker's laughing or facial expressions.. i mean you know there is only so many ways without things getting a little repetitive eeeek  
so I hope that you like it despite that hehe.  
anyways. I hope you enjoy the chapter. I was slightly distracted when writing this so I'm happy with it despite there wasn't as much effort and thought put into it.  
Disclaimer : i only own the plot _

**moonservant - **hehe not.. _bad_ per se but... shrugs ... um... WOO GO JOKACHEL. cough cough thanks for the review!! :)

**SpiritFanNumber1 - **ever and ever and ever... and ever... etc etc... wow thats a lot of evers xD im soo happy you like it THAT much thats like handing me a giant cookie! hehe thank you!

**LaJolieVent - **aww gee! thats great, i'm always worried that maybe i'm rushing everything so much so to read that you like that its gradual and developed is like woohoo for me :) oooh makes you wanna write too? i say go for it I'd read it!.

**To everyone who reviewed you are... my gorgeous gorgeous people. I love you like the fat kid loves cake.. seriously... i cannot thank you enough! ALL of you.  
**

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter seventeen - Escape

The Joker sat there comfortably in the cell, twiddling his thumbs slightly.  
He sure was bored in here, there was nothing to do, and the only form of entertainment was the huge oafs walking around like they were tough guys.

It made him laugh! all these people trying to act like they had importance or that they had power. Scheming away to reach the top of the food chain, how pathetic.

So here he was, caught!

Gotham's evil finally off the streets including mass celebration that Rachel Dawes was found alive and well.

The Joker smiled to himself; ah his little game had ended rather sooner than he would have hoped.  
But lets just say standing in line at McDonalds looking the way he did was definitely a way to grab attention, probably every one in the damn 100 mile radius called the cops, and of course Harvey Dent rode in on his white steed to demand that his Princess be returned to him in…._safe_ condition, when he teased him a little it earned him a few right hooks into the face of course, Luckily Dent's fists weren't made of steel like dear Batsy.

He would of loved to of had some more fun with Miss Dawes, she had spunk that girl, and he was sure that she absolutely loathed and lusted him at the same time, thanks to his mind games they had some fun times.  
Of course just because he was now 'captured' didn't mean he planned to stay captured.

No no….._no_ it was only a matter of time before the opportune moment would arise and he would escape.

"Hey… check out this fag" a deep voice yelled out in his direction.  
The Joker frowned…. Was this person talking about him?

Hmm

The Joker turned his head slowly facing the other burly men that had begun to surround him, laughing and cackling at his….attire.  
The Joker looked down at what he was wearing, he didn't see anything wrong with it, and he'd always thought he looked quite snazzy.  
His face… then? The blood that had been splattered on his face had been wiped away leaving certain spots on his face with out the mask of his white paint.

"Check you out…. _Clown" _one of the other large men said gesturing to his face and clothes while laughing, "Halloween come early this year... or do you always buy your clothes from fags-r-us?"

The Joker frowned "Fags…r….us? That's… ha…ha…ha.. Wow... And I thought my jokes were bad" He said shaking his head in mock disgust.  


"Tsk Tsk tsk you really ought to work on your material…… you know …perhaps take some advice from…prof-ession-als"

The Joker took a step towards the now frowning men; the men were twice the size of him and looked as though they could probably snap him like a twig.

"Like me for example… see the trick is….. To shock people. When they don't see something coming and you…surprise them… its like an electric shock to their system, they can't believe it… and they laaaugh… and they claaap….. And they smile…… and me….. I live for smiles" The Joker said his voice turning into a fierce growl.

The men standing before him looked as though The Joker had grown a second head.  
"….. Your fucking crazy" The burly man said pushing The Joker away from him with his hand.

The Joker licked his lips, and shook his head  
"No…… I'm… _not"_

Before the burly man could react The Joker had kicked him in the crotch  
The Burly man crumpled to the ground yelling in agony.

The Joker burst into uncontrollable laughed as he landed another kick to the mans head.

By this time some of the men had begun to crowd around him, some laughed at the poor burly mans predicament on the ground still writhing in pain and some looked like they were about to pummel The Joker's head into the bars.

One of the men grabbed fist falls of The Joker's hair and did just that, slamming his head into the metal bars sending vibrations of pain through The Joker's head rattling inside his brain.

The Joker sighed giggling insanely "Soooo Predictable.

The Man yelled in anger punching him in the face before The Joker heard the yells of the guards trying to separate them and calm down the beautiful chaos that The Joker had caused in a matter of minutes.  
Suddenly the new and improved Commissioner had grabbed him and yanked his still cuffed wrists towards the exit of the cells.

"I thought I said NOT to put him with the other prisoners…" Gordon yelled angrily to the rest of the staff.

'Well…well … opportune moment" The Joker thought to himself.

Before any of the police could get to them Gordon had turned his back leaving just enough time for The Joker do wrap his cuffs around his throat cutting off his precious air supply.  
He pulled, making sure the hard metal dug painfully into the skin of his neck.

His smile widened as he pressed his face against Gordons "….Commissioner……it seems we are all in a little bit of trouble here" he giggled.

Gordon opened his mouth "You're the only one who's going to be in trouble" Looking at the police officers who now had their gun pointed directly at them he nodded his head in a silent order for them to shoot despite that he obviously had a chance of getting hit by a bullet too.

The Joker shook his head laughing, stupid righteousness ….. Pathetic!.

"Oh…. You're playing the hero… how precious……its not going to matter anyway.. You see this whole police station is currently wired to explosives…. _Oh_ the joy of having minions that are willing to follow your every command... I tell ya I like _you_ James a lot more than those mindless drones and I'm sorry to see you go but you know what they say… can't keep _you're lady waiting". _

The atmosphere in the entire police station changed and panic rose in the air as gasps of fear were heard from police officers, simple civilians and even from the burly men in the cell.

The Joker felt Gordon's heart rate increase slightly but he refused to let it show.  
"So…. I am going to walk out of here and you are going to let me… otherwise I won't tell you were the bombs are and we all die...ooo-kay and you know what bombs do… com-ission-err…. They go BOOM"

There was nothing but silence, the only thing to be heard among the police station as people awaited an answer that would determine their lives was the ticking of the clocks and the heavy breathing of the nervous people.

"Tick tock tick tock…..come on come on … you're killing everyone in this room Commissioner Gordon"

"Okay… we let you go and you tell us where the bombs are" he managed to rasp out despite his lack of air supply.

"Oookay" The Joker said letting him pass he reached into his pants pulling out a detonator.  
Raising his eyes to meet the police officers many of whom now had raised eyebrows over where exactly he had hidden it.

The Joker winked and giggled "Oh I have all sorrrts of things stored away down there".

The Joker began to back away from the door slowly, the detonator still firmly placed in the palm of his hand.

"Where are the bombs?"Gordon demanded sternly despite his slightly crushed wind pipe.

The Joker bit his lip playfully "currently strapped to your dear officers over there" he said pointing to the now gagged police officers held by four men in clown masks.

As people began to move towards them at the far side of the room The Joker exited the building his maniacal laughter echoing down Gotham's dark streets.

When he finally got to the side of the road he looked down at the detonator and sighed  
"Which button was it…" he muttered to himself "Ah!" pressing the button, a large explosion erupted from the building behind him sending flames of fire and rubble into the air.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rachel looked in the mirror, she'd been home for hours now and she still hadn't enough courage to actually look at herself.  
She was dreading it she could only guess how completely disgusting she looked.

She actually looked better than she had originally expected, after a shower and a good brush through, her hair wasn't matted, after some sleep the dark bags that hung from her eyes had disappeared a bit, but her face was still ashen and sunken and the image reminded her of when her cousin Louisa was diagnosed with cancer and was having chemotherapy.

Beautiful? Rachel huffed, she looked horrible, was this what she looked like all the time? _No_ a voice echoed in her head '_only since him'_

Rachel sighed looking at the bandage that covered her neck.  
The flesh wound from The Joker's knife still remained; she hadn't even looked at it yet.  
The Doctor's said that it might scar a little, but would probably fade with time, Rachel hoped so she didn't want a reminder.

Gently peeling the bandage off, she winced as the wound was pulled open and exposed to the air.  
Well… It didn't look as bad she thought.  
Raising her fingers to her neck Rachel prodded at the dark wound, Rachel closed her eyes imagining the blood that had dripped from the cut, the way The Joker licked it away like it was some kind of desert.  
.

"Hey…" a voice said from behind her.  
Rachel's eyes sprang open and she smiled, of course Harvey did not let her go home by herself, her dear protector.

"So…. How bad is it…. Am I hideous?" Rachel said chuckling at her reflection.  
Harvey chuckled also before turning her around to kiss her lips.  
"You're beautiful….as always".

Rachel flinched slightly hearing the word beautiful come from Harvey's mouth…. It just sounded wrong.  
Why did it sound so weird coming from him. Surly he had called her Beautiful before?  
But for some reason Rachel felt an odd pull in her stomach, no Beautiful was The Joker's name for her, that part of her life had to be over now.

Obviously seeing Rachel flinch he gently cupped her cheek "Hey.. You okay…. You seem a little shaken"  
Snapping out of her thoughts Rachel laughed nervously "yeah, I'm just so tired, I think I could sleep forever"

Harvey laughed before suddenly realizing something that he wanted to forget "Oh… uh.. .Bruce Wayne called… he wanted to talk to you, but you were sleeping I told him you'd call him back when you woke up"

Rachel nodded, so Bruce wanted to talk to her. She'd been dreading having to talk to him, she remembered his odd expression when she begged him to stop hurting The Joker with tears in her eyes. He looked shocked and confused by it, how would she explain it? Could she simply fall back on the excuse that she was a bleeding heart?

A ringing sound echoed through her apartment that she guessed was Harvey's phone. Picking it up Rachel watched Harvey's facial expression go from shocked, to angry, to upset then back to angry again.

"Okay, I'll be right there" he said hanging up.  
His face now looked nearly as ashen as hers did and he watched as his hands shook in anger.  
"What happened?" Rachel asked dreading the answer.  
Harvey didn't answer not being able to find the words.  
Grabbing his hand so he'd look her in the eyes Rachel asked again "Harvey….What happened?!"

"The Joker escaped……… he's on the loose"

* * *

ohhh man.

man oh man oh man

eeek hehe IM SORRY  
maybe i should of put more thought into it...

ooh well  
there will be some Jokachel action in the next one hopefully that will be written better

anyway

review :)


	18. Chapter 18 Guilty

_HOWDY waves HERE i am again_

_i know i know i said there would be .. 'explosive' interaction but... im sorry that you'll have to wait perhaps another chapter for said explosive interations though there is Jokachel interaction that i had some fun writing, that i hope you all enjoy as well!  
So, read enjoy and look forward to the next one for some.. ...er explosions. _

**LadyInverness - **DUDE.. a guy dressed as the joker winked at you.. woo that is so cool i wish people i know would randomly dress up as characters from comic books/movies sighs

**Varjak - Thank you! I'm glad that you've seen an improvement thats what i hoped would happened anyway and **yes they are adorable together in a twisted kind of way... i don't understand what it is about them but... the fact that they are so completely oposite it only seems right that they'd fit! hehe ... 'Sirius' serious... hahe oh you made my day!  
10Rose own my heart utterly and completely 33

_Disclaimer : i do not own the following characters I simply use them to satisfy myself... wait... that sounds a little dirty hehe. _

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**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME **

Chapter eighteen : Guilty

Rachel felt her mouth drop open in shock, out of all the things that she had expected Harvey to say, that had been on the bottom of the list.  
"W-what?" she stuttered, blinking lamely.

Harvey had already turned around and grabbed his coat shoving it on in record speed.  
"Where are you going… what happened?" Rachel gushed anxiously blocking her doorway.

"The Joker escaped… not to mention he blew up the police station Rachel... That was Gordon on the phone"

"He's okay, Gordon I mean?" Rachel asked suddenly feeling worried.  
"Few scratches but he wasn't close enough to the explosion for any serious injuries" Harvey said beginning to exit her house.

Rachel bit her lip, should she go with them? If anything the person The Joker would come after first was her … right? Unless he just escaped to leave Gotham, somehow Rachel doubted that The Joker simply left town.  
"I'm coming with you" She blurted out.

Harvey shook his head instantly "NO Rachel you're not, it's too dangerous"  
Rachel scoffed, sometimes Harvey's protectiveness got somewhat _over_ protective.

"Harvey, come on I've been in dangerous situations before I'll be fine"

Harvey shook his head again obviously not willing to risk her life anymore, Rachel would have found it cute on any normal day but not when the situation was so urgent.

"No way, I don't want you anywhere near there, you're going to stay here and lock the doors and wait for me to come back… okay.. Please promise me Rachel" Harvey said near desperation filling his voice.  
Rachel sighed, looking at Harvey's pleading face; he really knew how to pull on her heartstrings.

"Fine…" Rachel said sighing dramatically. Harvey nodded leaning forward he kissed her passionately his lips molding over hers sending Rachel into heart palpitations.  
Then he was gone, and Rachel was alone again.

She knew that The Joker was going to come for her again, what he'd do when he got there she didn't know. Harvey was too stressed to be thinking clearly, he obviously forgot that The Joker had broken into her apartment before and abducted her; a simple locked door wasn't going to keep him out.

Looking around her apartment Rachel felt herself begin to tremble slightly, the adrenalin overcoming her body, was this fear or excitement?  
She had to be ready, ready for what ever The Joker was going to do.  
As she began mentally preparing herself she couldn't help but wonder why she didn't remind Harvey that The Joker was no doubt coming to her.  
Was it because some small part of her buried deep in her mind wanted him to come to her?

It had been nearly half and hour and there was no sign of The Joker, Rachel had begun to doubt herself.  
Perhaps he really was just going to skip town and they'd never hear about what happened to the chaotic Joker, like some kind of legendary Gotham figure, the villain who disappeared without a trace.

But while thinking this some other part of Rachel told herself that The Joker wouldn't leave without getting one last jab at her, especially her, just to tease her one more time simply because he knew he could.

He was coming to her, he was, it would be totally out of character for him not to.

Rachel's eyes flickered to the clock, every second seem to last forever, was Harvey alright?  
When would he get home? What if The Joker had done something to hurt him, why didn't the Joker come to see her? She was nervous, sitting there doing nothing didn't feel right, but my god was she tired; it seemed every muscle in her body was screaming at her to go to sleep.

Yawning Rachel stretched herself out on her sofa, resting her head on the arm.  
She didn't want to fall asleep, but she couldn't keep her eyes open any longer it was if there was something weighing her eyes down.  
Okay, The Joker hadn't come yet, he probably wouldn't at all.

'I'll just rest my eyes' was Rachel's last conscious thought before she drifted off into a restless slumber.

Rachel's eyes fluttered open, scanning the fuzzy darkness in her apartment, yawning she looked over at the clock; she'd been asleep for three hours, fabulous.  
She sat up on the couch stretching out her slightly stiff muscles.

"BOO!" a thundering voice yelled through her apartment.

Rachel screamed, jumping up from her position on the couch she ran to the light switch on her wall, flicking it on.  
There sitting on the small reclining chair was The Joker. He was laid back with his eyes slightly hooded as 

if he was on the verge of sleep, but the ever present sadistic smile remained.  
"Shit yourself?" he giggled.

Rachel gasped, clutching her chest trying to steady her racing heart.  
"NO! But you nearly gave me a fucking heart attack!" She yelled angrily.

"Ooooh… .Rachel language... not that I don't _love_ dirty talk but I don't think now is the time" he said, giggling slightly.

Rachel only glared, forcing all her hateful feelings for him through the blue colour of her eyes.  
She took a few steps towards him, but didn't want to get too close, for all she knew he was only there to finish the job that Bruce interrupted.

"You blew up the police station?" Rachel growled at him "How many more innocent people did kill today?"

The Joker rolled his eyes sighing "Not many…. Most of them were prisoners", smiling he added "and besides... ... Nobody is innocent everybody is guilty for something"

Rachel couldn't believe him, shaking her head, how could he think that everyone deserved the same fate in the end?

"So that's your philosophy is it? Some person or people wronged you so now you think everyone is guilty and deserves to die?" she said nearly hysterically.

The Joker stared at her as if he was contemplating her question. Suddenly he reached out for her wrist yanking her towards him.  
Rachel let out a little yelp of surprise as she tumbled and crashed in his body. He still had a firm grasp on her wrists pulling her so she was in his lap.  
Rachel struggled to get free of his grip, but it didn't nothing but make him giggle at her struggle.  
That's what he loved the most right? Her struggling, always there to point and laugh at her as she was forced to either surrender or struggle to break free from his hold on her.

"Oooh ha! Look at you go…… like a….a.. Little worm on a hook" he laughed at her "_relaaax_ beautiful"

Rachel groaned as his grip on her wrists tightened even further like he was tying himself to her not willing to ever let her go. She had to break free; this was meant to be her cold turkey! She couldn't be with him, it burned.

"Let me go!" she growled.

"You say that so often…. "His legs wrapped around her waist keeping her in place so there was absolutely no escape for her, locking her inside his arms.

Rachel stopped struggling, she always did, the will to fight exiting her body leaving her too tired to try and escape the burning.

"Ahh.. That's better...Now where were we? Oh right…… People are good, people are little … doves of forgiveness and joy! And everyone has some goodness in them…. Am I right Miss Dawes?" he rested his head on hers so their faces were as close as possible and grinned when she didn't begin struggling again.

"The world doesn't work that way…….. life…has no happy ending……people have evil inside them no matter who they are….." lowering his voice into a gravelly whisper he licked at her lips making her gasp "Even you Rachel"

"I simply….even out the score".

Rachel took a deep breath, desperate to have some kind of level head in this situation; the last thing she needed was to pass out again while she was alone with the Joker.  
She looked at his face, able to make out every single feature, every single crack of makeup that had been caked on his face.

"Why are you here….. They'll be looking for you" Rachel said forcing her voice not to portray any of her mixed up feelings.

The Joker grinned, his mouth opening like the carved mouth of a pumpkin.  
"Well…… so I could have some... _alone_ time with my new best friend" he said pinching her cheeks in the same way her grandmother used to.

Using her now free hands, she slapped his hands away only making him giggle even more.  
"Stop that..." She said frustrated, "Since when was I your 'best friend', what happened to that knife of yours?"

The Joker winced "Oh right, well Knife comes second, but don't tell _her_ that… it might hurt her feelings…... it will be our... Little secret" he said wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.  
Rachel narrowed her eyes at him despite the anxious fluttering of excitement in her gut.

The Joker burst out into laughter and Rachel could feel the rumbling of his body beneath hers.  
Rachel tried to keep the small smile from forming on her mouth but it was forcing its way there, seeing him like this was so rare.  
Oh sure he laughed all the bloody time, but not like this…. This was simple laughter without any hidden sinister meaning.

'Once in a blue moon event' Rachel thought to herself, she was going to savor it and store it in her memory; The moment the Joker, for once seemed human, she tried to forget that he had just blown up a bunch of people, it was ruining the moment.

The Joker was now struggling to catch his breath

"You... you should have seen your face…" Wiping the tears from his eyes he sighed "_priceless…._" He chuckled.

Rachel chuckled earning a slightly surprised look from The Joker.

"You're…._Insane_" she said shaking her head in disbelief at the impossible man beneath her.  
"Yeaaah……. You've got it! No more of this 'you're crazy!' Crap" he said looking both annoyed and proud at the same time.

Rachel tried to get up but The Joker's legs still refused to let her go, she turned back to face him and he was smirking cruelly at her.  
"..You can spend time with me without me being on top of you!" she mumbled frowning.

"But it's so much more fun this way!" The Joker whined, finally letting her go.

Standing up Rachel asked him again "So I'm going to ask you again….. Why are you here?".

The Joker sighed sitting up so his elbows were rested on his knee's, looking up at her.  
"Because… Miss Dawes…you are like chaos…..you're addictive".

Rachel felt her heart stop, did he just say? No!

He did…

Did he?

Oh god!

So much for not passing out again.

Seemingly loving the current look on her face The Joker broke out into another fit of laughter, the noises spilling out no longer human, like the cackle of a jack-o-lantern on Halloween.

It chilled her to the bone, his words replaying in her head. Addictive.  
This was not good, one thing she knew about addictions was that they were hard to give up, and The Joker didn't seem like he had any plans to give her up anytime soon.

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_eeeeh.  
the pressure is rising  
it can only rise so much before some massive explosions... right? eh  
anyway hope you liked as usual  
you know what to do_

little button.. press press press!


	19. Chapter 19 Hunger

_hi again!_

_Sorry i havn't updated in a few days, I've been busy and i've seriously injured my hand, i actually suspect that i've broken it._

_note to self- do not let friend bash hand with fist, may result in broken bone :(  
my hand is really swolen and sore and my bones keep making weird creeky noises and i can feel it too which is why this chapter is fairly short.  
i warn you now there is **chapter contains fairly explicit sexual content**_ so if thats not your thing...skip.  
_now this is probably the most explicit thing i've ever written and its not really my... best subject which is why some of this chapter was uh..co-written by good friend mary.. who gave me some pointers. she's got one sick mind hehe woo i love you Mary!  
anyway hope you enjoy!  
_

Disclaimer : i do not own. i simply use them and abuse em'.

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**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter nineteen : Hunger

Rachel sighed, wishing that this was some kind of nightmare that she'd wake up from; her eyes flickered to the man currently ransacking her kitchen

The Joker had decided he was hungry, it was weird, like sleeping, eating was something that Rachel couldn't imagine the Joker doing. so when he said he was hungry she couldn't help but be a little surprised.

Another loud crash came from the kitchen as he opened and closed doors and drawers.

"What are you looking for... hey be careful with those, my grandmother gave me that" Rachel said angrily as he fiddled with a particularly priceless china set.

The Joker huffed "Rachel… you realize that you have nothing in this kitchen to eat?"

Rachel threw her hands up in frustration "I was held hostage for nearly a week, sorry that I haven't done the food shopping".

The Joker sighed, his shoulders slumping in disappointment "Well…that's a shame… _oh_ well I'm sure there are plenty of other ways... to … fulfill by _hunger_" he growled in a way that Rachel saw as animalistic.

Rachel swallowed trying hard to get rid of the lump in her throat, The Joker had been making more suggestive comments than normal and it was really starting to make her nervous, she was quite used to him making sarcastic and sexual innuendo but not to this extent.

The Joker smirked at Rachel's discomfort walking slowly towards her, purposely exaggerating every step making Rachel's breathing hitch with his drawn out pace.

Taking a seat so he was sitting next to her on the sofa he reached out to her trembling hand he turned it around in his hand stroking the skin of her palm teasingly.  
Rachel's trembling only increased but she didn't remove her hand, which really pissed her off.  
'So much for cold turkey…. 'She thought scolding herself.

The Joker giggled "Are you….ner-vous Miss Dawes?" he asked.

Rachel shook her head "n-no…." she stuttered, and cringed when she realized that she couldn't even talk probably because of her trembling body.

The Joker's smile widened, lifting her hand up he ran his fingers over all the bones, massaging them.  
Rachel felt herself melt into the feeling, it was chilling her and burning her at the same time but she didn't want him to ever let go.

"Rachel did you know that the hand has 27 bones?" he lifted her hand to his mouth licking her index finger with his tongue.

Locking his bleeding lips around the pulse point of her wrist he giggled when Rachel whimpered loudly.

"There are 8…. In the wrist……. " licking the palm of her hand Rachel couldn't take her eyes off his smoldering gaze as his tongue left a trail of saliva on the skin of her palm "The palm….has 5"

"and the remaining 14…. Make up these… _bea-utiful_ little fingerrr's of yours" this time he shoved her entire index finger in his mouth sucking on it all the while his scarred mouth wide with humour.

Rachel felt her mouth drop open unable to close it, her breath coming out in soft pants as The Joker continued to suck on her digit.  
"Please… stop" she begged her voice barely above a whisper.

The Joker stopped and removed his mouth from her hand  
"Stop…._stop_… but I'm hungry and you taste good enough ……_to eat"_ he growled gripping her hand in a vice-like grip.

Rachel felt the bones in her hand protest at the pressure The Joker was putting on them, moaning in pain she tried yanking them but his grip was too strong, interlocking their fingers he gripped onto her hand like she was his life-line.

Rachel stared into his eyes and didn't need him to say anything to know that he wasn't going to let her go.  
So Rachel embraced it instead, taking the pain in with the feeling of fear and the burning sensation of his skin on hers.  
The Joker leaned in so she was pushed to the back of the sofa, raising their interlocking hands above her head.  
The grip on her hands seemed to never loosen constantly gripping at her like she was keeping him grounded.

"A good host never leaves their guest…hungry am I right Rachel?" the Joker said using his free hand to grasp her neck.

Rachel mustered up all the courage she had inside her, her voice coming out strained because of the pressure The Joker's hand had on her airway.

"Addictions always end badly… am I right _Joker_"

The Joker giggled tapping her nose playfully, "Addictions only end badly….. If you let them end at all, I say, never let it end and it will alwaaays stay…chaotic"

He ground his hips into hers and Rachel yelled out at the feeling of his obvious arousal grounding into her.

"Every thing ends" Rachel gasped as she heard the ripping sounds of material as The Joker cut through her skirt and panties with the blade of his knife.  
Rachel glared at him as one of her more expensive skirts fell to pieces.

"Not… If… you... Don't let it" The Joker ground out.  
Rachel screamed as he plunged his fingers into her aching center, the sensations so overwhelming that she could already see stars behind her lids.

Grounding her hips into his hand she automatically grasped at his shoulders, her knuckles turning white.  
Squeezing her eyes shut, it seemed everything fell away, there was only him and her, and in this world there was no Joker or even a Rachel just their entities entwined like a crossroad colliding sending Rachel tail spinning into unknown destinations.

Suddenly his fingers were gone and Rachel whimpered at the loss of contact, her core still throbbing almost painfully.  
Then there was pain, blinding hot pain and Rachel heard her own voice erupt from her throat, momentarily feeling the air ripped from her lungs.  
Her eyes flung open as she felt the cold blade rip at the skin of her stomach.

Rachel began to squirm to get away from the pain as The Joker laughed and dug the knife a little deeper.  
"What are you doing ...Stop!" Rachel yelled out in pain, anger and to her absolute horror arousal.

"Ahh….. funny how there's such a fine line between……pleasure…and…pain" he giggled still grounding himself into her while he sliced her skin.

The Joker's laughter mixed with her screams of pain echoed through her apartment, no doubt down the halls and into other apartments as well.

The pain was becoming unbearable as rows of her flesh were being ripped apart, Rachel screamed while thrashing about trying to get away from what seemed like endless torture.  
The Joker ran his fingers through her hair in a soothing manner, Rachel whimpered as small drops of her own blood dripped onto her face from the tips of his fingers.

"Shh shh…. Shhhhh now now Raaachel I always knew you'd be a screamer" He said his mouth hovering above hers.

Rachel felt her lips tremble, the screams dying in her throat but the burning pain through her abdomen still blazing.  
"Why are you doing this… Why can't you just leave me alone"  
Tears pooled at her eyes and trailed down her flushed cheeks.

The Joker wiped a tear away with his finger, gazing at her through lust filled eyes.  
"Because…I like to see what makes you….tick…. tick..tick..tick…hmm speaking of ticking, how long has 

Harrrvey been gone, wonder when he'll be back….. "Rachel groaned as he clutched at their still entwined hands. "Say….wonder what the look on his face would be like, for him……..in all his… ickle-Harvey glory to come in…. and see… his… precious little miss _writhing _and _screaming _with my hand inside her special place….. "Lowering his hand he stroked at the warmth of her center, teasing the throbbing nub with the pads of his fingers.

Rachel bucked into his hand letting out a squeak of pleasure. She clutched his hair in her fists as he buried his face in her neck biting and licking at the sensitive skin.

"To see………that not only was I …_playing_ you like some kind of…. Instrument" putting just the right amount of pressure he pinched her clit making Rachel give a cry of passion.

"Pressing….all the right keys…. But also that I was carving her up like a pumpkin and …she…. Was _enjoying it!_".

Giggling into her ear, Rachel felt his warm breath as well as the earth shattering sensations of his fingers. She hugged him to her wrapping her arms around his body.  
Rachel felt the tears flow freely down her face as she buried her face in his hair choking back sobs and cries of both pleasure and pain.  
Because he was right, the pain was indescribable it sent shockwaves through her entire body, mixed with the pleasure of his fingers working their way inside her, it made her feel so incredibly alive.

It was as if, if the pain and pleasure ever stopped, if he ever left her the feeling would die and so would she and that made her sick.  
Through her choked sobs Rachel managed to whisper in his ear, her voice breaking

"I hate you"

The Joker lifted his head to face her, his eyes blazing and the empty caverns of his eyes once again filling with those rare signs of life,  
"Hate makes the world go 'round beautiful" he said before crushing his lips to hers.

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_woooo jokachel sexy time... well kind of  
hope you... liked_

_also i would love to update tomorrow but i will not be able to as i will be partaaaying with Panic at the disco! woooo  
how i love those boys.. excitement!  
so go on fellow readers review me_

**you know you want to **


	20. Chapter 20 Beauty

_woo i meant to post yesterday but i was still recovering from partaaaying with Panic at the disco... also woo i met Cobra Starship!!  
XD love them!_

_anyway here is chapter 20 eeek... i hope you enjoy it. it took me a while to write it.  
as usual i really do hope you like it more than i do... because i never really like my work hahe!!_

_**Aka Fuyu -**awwh thanks, i officially love you now, i'm glad that you've gotten hooked on it :)_

_**Ink and Parchment - **pheew you like it really? god i was so worried about that chapter.. for one thing i felt so dirty... heh.. thats like the first...explicit thing that i've ever written which is why i got my friend to help me with it. woo i was so unsure. but thanks for reasurring me about that one!._

_**Kendra Luehr - **ooh i'm not quite sure which fic your talking about ... but the similarities completely unintentional! thanks for the review anyway._

_**Rachelle123 **- ahh yes... male and female genitalia will ...uh connect hehe as for when... well thats a secret ;)_

_**thanks to everyone for taking the time to read and review you make my day :) **_

_disclaimer : do not own do not own do not own seriously.. .how many times must i say this_

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_._

_**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**_

Chapter Twenty- Beauty

Rachel couldn't concentrate on anything except the feeling of The Joker's lips on hers, his weight pushing her into the cushions of the sofa.  
The wounds on her stomach were stinging and were being irritated by the material of his shirt scratching against the bleeding cuts.

But the feeling was welcomed and she couldn't help but feel her back arch into his body, rubbing against him.

There was an aching feeling building in her stomach, the ache both painful and wonderful at the same time.

Running his fingers over her stomach The Joker gathered the blood from her flesh, the crimson liquid dripping from his fingers.  
Rachel felt her stomach churn, it was disgusting, that was her blood he was admiring, yet she still couldn't find it in her to care. It was sickening.

His fingers ran over her lips leaving trails of blood. He placed his knife to the corner of her mouth, the cold metal tickling her cheek slightly.  
"Open…sesame" he coaxed before shoving his blood coated finger into her mouth.

Rachel gagged slightly at the force of his finger, but felt her body react to his lusty gaze, the way he bit his red cracked lips in amusement and the way she was currently licking her own blood off his finger like it was the most natural thing in the world.

The Joker groaned as Rachel continued to lick his finger and Rachel felt herself become overwhelmed with excitement.  
This was her, Rachel Dawes doing this to him, making him squirm as she rotated her hips against his, so this was what it felt like to score a point on their game, she could see why The Joker liked it so much.

Rachel suddenly felt brave and without thinking her hands travelled to the growing bulge in his trousers, she gently caressed him through the material making him gasp in pleasure.

"You little vixen you" The Joker giggled before nipping at her lips drawing blood.

Rachel could feel her body float, this feeling that this lunatic was invoking in her was making her crazy.  
It felt like she was flying and falling at the same time, soaring before dropping to a bed of blades.

But she couldn't be doing this, what about Harvey the man she loved, the man she intended to spend the rest of her life with.  
How could she possibly be doing this with the laughing man who enjoyed killing people and playing mind games with people?

How could she be allowing herself to do this, and enjoy it?

The Joker gently caressed her cheek with his knife, the cool feeling of the metal making Rachel shiver slightly.  
He looked down at her, and his face was mere inches from hers, Rachel could do nothing but look up into his gaze.

What scared her the most about the way he was looking at her was not just the intense look in his eyes, it was the fact that the fixed grin that always seemed to be present on his face was not there. His ghostly face staring into hers was completely serious for once and it caused her stomach to flutter violently

Rachel's breath caught in her throat as The Joker looked at her face, his eyes running over every feature on her face; it was almost like he was memorizing her, imprinting her on his mind.  
And Rachel got the feeling that he was searching for something inside her, she didn't know what it was but his dark eyes boring into hers was like he was looking into her soul.

So serious…….. So unlike him, this scared her more than any threat he'd ever given her, every laughing gaze, no, this serious face was haunting and gave her a feeling of absolute dread.

Nothing good can come of this.

The ending to this story couldn't ever be a happy one, the thought made her heart feel as though it was cracking, splintering, it was not broken yet but she knew the story would end with it in pieces.

Their story would end with her broken, she was already breaking and he was the cause.

Rachel just wanted him to stop looking at her, 'stop it…. Just.. Stop looking at me please' she silently begged.

She couldn't seem to find her voice and The Joker for once didn't look as though he had a sadistic retort to fire at her to make her world crumble.  
He was just laying there the weight and warmth of his body pressing into hers, his knife slowly cutting into her mouth, but Rachel barely felt the slight sting of the knife or the blinding pain of the wounds on her stomach or the throbbing arousal that had been burning her body mere minutes ago.

She could only feel The Joker's penetrating eyes, the warmth of his body and dull ache building in her heart.

Rachel couldn't understand what she saw in his eyes, so many different things at once, they held stories and secrets normally hidden so well, they were laid out before her now.

The Joker leaned forward so she could no longer see his eyes the side of his white painted cheek grating against hers.  
The bumpy scars on his cheeks brushing her skin, they were surprisingly soft and Rachel found herself enjoying the feeling of being so close to them, she doubted she'd ever get a chance again.

Soon, this hidden Joker would disappear and her dear abductor would return, full force once again pretending that nothing happened.  
Perhaps it was for the best, this man that was currently in her arms was too obviously broken, and it made her want to save him even more, which would only disappoint her when she once again realized that saving something that was dead most of the time was impossible.

Rachel found her hands run from the greasy strands of his hair to his painted features and to the side of his forever smiling cheek.

A giggle erupted from the crook of her neck and she felt The Joker shudder against her, Frowning she waited for The Joker to explain himself when another extremely loud cackle was heard. Raising his head, the Joker's face widened in a grin

"You…. Miss Dawes.. Never learn……..hmm you are such a bleeding heart, any sob story…any tiny ounce of …. Hum-man-ity I show… and you fall for it every single time" sighing The Joker shook his head "frankly Missy…. I'm ashamed that you still haven't learned anything from our time…together"

Rachel glared, fire bubbling under her skin just waiting to explode, pushing the Joker off her she stood up from the couch, momentarily forgetting her current nakedness from the waist down.

The Joker's body was wracked with laughter as he tumbled slightly to the floor, clutching his still broken rib.  
Blushing Rachel went to her room to get some more clothes so The Joker couldn't laugh at her expense anymore than he already had.

When she returned The Joker was leaning against her kitchen counter smirking at her.  
"Well… it's been a pleasure reaaally…. But you know what they say you can't have too much of a good thing"

Rachel scoffed her anger evident in her voice  
"Where do you plan on going, everyone in Gotham is looking for you Joker, you have no where to go except out of town and even then they'll probably be looking for you too… its over"

"Well….. I should hope so… I mean how much to I have to do to this city before somebody would just….end me… how many people do I have to slice up before your…. Precious Batman would finally put an end to the suffering of his beloved Gotham… "

Rachel glared "Not everyone is as cold hearted as you"

Before Rachel even knew it The Joker had her backed into the wall the knife to her cheek once more

"Wrong…… ever-ry one is just as cold hearted as me…….. With the right incentive. Nobody…. Is so good…so……heroic to simply stand by while everything burns…believe me Rachel… if pushed…even the greatest of men will fall".

Rachel shook her head determined to be strong despite the growing feeling of dread in her stomach and the sharp blade pressed into her cheek, the pain now electrifying her senses with perfect clarity.

"Your wrong" She said through gritted teeth.

"Oh…?" The Joker said before grabbing her jaw, Rachel squirmed, trying to break free but his grasp was too strong.  
Placing the knife to the delicate skin of her cheek Rachel winced as he began to slice the skin open from her mouth.

"Say tell me… what would… Harvey Dent do if I butchered his little princess... Right here in her own home and strung her from the building for the world too see….hmm? You don't think he would turn his back on all that he's been preaching … you think he wouldn't……. Enforce… justice … no no he would, he'd fall… just like anyone else would"

Rachel shook her head refusing to believe that her Harvey would ever do such a thing, she knew him, probably better than she knew herself and Harvey Dent would never let himself fall as low as The Joker.

The Joker giggled "Right…. I see because there is such…. Beauty in the world am I right Rachel.. yeaaah everyone has some good inside"

Rachel cried out as he dug even deeper into her cheek, pain radiating through her entire face.  
"Please…. Stop" Rachel pleaded, tears pooling from her eyes as the Joker continued to cut into her face forcing her mouth into a blood red smile.

Rachel felt her body shake with sobs.

The Joker ran one hand over her cheek as he cut into her skin leaving trails of blood dripping down her neck; he looked like he was savoring every emotion that flickered across her face.

"Shh shh… don't cry sweetheart" he said in a surprisingly tender voice, wiping her tears away affectionately. "After all it doesn't matter what you look like…..like you said Miss Dawes what counts is…. The beauty on the inside"

Rachel sobbed as The Joker leaned forward kissing her forehead before letting her slump to the floor in pain.

Rachel felt herself begin to black out, the pain beginning to get a little too much for her. She knew it wasn't that bad, at least not as bad as his, he hadn't cut all the way into her cheek, she knew that he probably hadn't cut deep enough to leave a scar and if it did it would probably only be faint but it was still unbearably painful.

As the last remnants of consciousness began to slip away and her vision began to get blurry Rachel was sure that The Joker had lent over her, brushing her hair away from her face softly.

"Until next time" was the last thing she heard before sleep called to her.

* * *

___wooo anyone think that The Joker's little 'carve up rachel's face' deal was a bit of defense mechanism because she caught him at a vulnerable...'real human' moment?  
hmm its up too you people.  
hope you liked it  
i also hope that i wrote both of their... growing 'feelings' for each other in a realistic way.  
i'll update soon. review droogies! _


	21. Chapter 21 Lie

_thanks for the reviews folks.  
sorry for the wait, writers block's a bitch.  
hopefully this was worth it.  
enjoy droogies  
_

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME **

Chapter twentyone - Lie

Rachel woke to an empty hospital room, the room was cold and silent and Rachel couldn't help but have a feeling of déjà vu.  
Why was she here?

Rachel tried to sit up but was forced down again by the intense pain radiating from her stomach; flashes appeared in her mind, short flashes of light colour and sound.

The Joker on top of her, every part of his body touching hers, setting her alight with every touch.  
He was crawling his way inside her, the blinding yet incredible feeling that came with the pain as he sliced rows of her flesh.

Rachel squeezed her eyes shut, hoping that the images would disappear from her mind but they only continued to get more vivid.  
Oh, that look on his face, that sudden look that made Rachel want to hold him forever, the sudden seriousness of his intense gaze.  
Then he ruined it, once again pushing her off her high.  
The Joker returning, the laughing voice, how could she have fallen for it yet again?

Rachel remembered the anger boiling inside of her and then she remembered The Joker forcing her against a wall, the blade of his knife cutting into her cheek.  
Giving her his smile or half a smile in technical terms.

Lifting her fingers to the side of her cheek Rachel winced, running her fingers over the bandaged wound.  
The material of the bandage was grainy under her fingers and just small amounts of pressure sent pain through her face.  
Here she was, alone inside a hospital room yet again with wounds inflicted by the Joker.  
She hated him she supposed, but mostly she hated the fact that she didn't really hate him which of course caused her to hate herself.

Rachel didn't want to think about how The Joker could hurt her and hurt so many other people, how he could be such a cruel manipulative monster and yet there was still something about him that she wanted.

Rachel laughed bitterly, feeling her jaw clench, here she had Harvey Dent who she loved dearly and who loved her and wanted to marry her, who was willing to do anything for her and was spending his life trying to make Gotham a better place.  
Then she had Bruce, her dear friend and the man that she knew she'd always love, their bond would probably always be something special. Bruce who fought for those who couldn't, vigilante by night 

fighting the same fight Harvey was.  
Two wonderful men who she loved and who both loved her and she of course had to have the undeniable attraction to the insane man in clown makeup who just loved to torment her.  
How ironic.

'Maybe the Joker was right' she thought frowning slightly 'maybe all women do fall for the bad boys'.

Rachel's thoughts were interrupted when a very tired looking Harvey Dent entered her hospital room.  
His eyes lit up when he saw that she was awake, and it looked as though a weight had been lifted from his shoulders.

"Rachel" he gasped walking towards her.

"Hello" Rachel said, forcing a smile on her face, but the smile instantly disappeared when half of her face protested painfully.

In a matter of seconds Harvey had a firm grasp on her hand, his grip so tight that Rachel felt her hands ache slightly. He was gripping her hand like he was afraid that she would disappear.  
The way he gripped her hand was so familiar, Rachel felt her heart skip a beat as images of The Joker's fingers laced with hers entered her mind.

"What happened?" Rachel asked looking at Harvey's worried eyes.

Harvey sighed

"We searched, looking for The Joker…… but we couldn't find him... So I went back to your place… I knocked on your door but there was no answer, so I kicked the door in and I saw you…. Lying there blood soaked through your shirt and…..your face….I guess we know where the Joker was"

Rachel's stomach lurched at the thought of Harvey having to come home to that; he was the one that told her to stay home so she wouldn't get hurt.

"I'm sorry you had to see that…. How bad is it" Rachel asked dreading the answer. If she looked anything like how she felt she knew that it couldn't look great.

She felt like she'd been put through a meat grinder.

Harvey's face visually paled "You're going to be fine….. The doctors say that your face will heal; it probably won't even leave a scar…. Your stomach……." Trailing off, Harvey closed his eyes.

Rachel took a deep breath preparing herself for the answer, she knew her face wasn't that bad despite how much it hurt, it seemed The Joker didn't want to destroy her face too much, and for that she was grateful.  
But her stomach, she knew that was worse, every time she moved she felt the sensation of her body being pulled in different directions, like something was cutting her in different directions.

"Harvey….. Tell me" Rachel said in a soothing voice.

Harvey looked down at his feet, unable to fully meet Rachel's eyes.  
Rachel cupped his cheek lifting his face so that he was looking at her.  


Harvey chuckled, but there was no amusement in his laughter  
"He butchered you Rachel" his voice breaking.

Rachel nodded taking a deep breath; it was an answer that she had been expecting after all.

"He cut you really deep….. There was so much blood and…. They can try but…. they won't be able to get rid of the scars".

Rachel nodded again, calmly taking in this new information, okay so perhaps it was worse than Rachel had first thought.  
She knew it would be bad, because of the pain she was now feeling, but how could she of not noticed how bad it was last night?

"It's okay" Rachel whispered trying to stop the tears of anger that had begun to well up.  
Anger at _him_ for turning her into some kind of…_monster_ inside and out. He was changing her and no matter how hard she tried she couldn't stop him.

Harvey leaned forward pressing a kiss to her unbandaged cheek, wiping her fallen tears away with his finger.  
"We'll get him... I promise"

Rachel nodded smiling, despite the pain in her cheek "I know…. Of course you will... My hero" she laughed quietly through the pain and tears.

Harvey didn't smile though his face was a picture of regret and pain as well as guilt

.  
"I'm so sorry" he said squeezing her hand.

Rachel shook her head gently "Harvey.. You have nothing to feel sorry for, this isn't your fault"

"If I'd stayed then I could of protected you... Like I should"

Rachel scoffed "You'd have nothing to protect me from, The Joker's not stupid he wouldn't have bothered if you were there, he just wanted alone time with me"

Harvey frowned, his eyes narrowing "Why…. I mean why would he want alone time with you, when he only abducted you in the first place to get to Batman and I...Right?"

Rachel's eyes widened but she couldn't think of anything to say, she couldn't come right out and say that The Joker has some weird addiction to her and simply loves to spend quality time with her.  
But she couldn't think of a good believable lie either.

Harvey's eyes only narrowed further when Rachel didn't say anything.

"Rachel…?" he asked slowly.

Rachel still couldn't think of anything to say, she'd already lied so much to Harvey already how much more would she have to make up?

"What…went on in that room?"

"N-nothing… he…. just came and went he didn't really…. Nothing" Lie…such a lie! "Really Harvey we barely even talked….." another lie!

Harvey's eyes looked into her and Rachel knew that Harvey saw something that she'd been trying to keep hidden, the secret was starting to appear in her eyes and she couldn't hide her secrets with jokes and laughter and hollow existence… not like the Joker could.

"Rachel…….why is he taking such an interesting in you now? What did he do to you?" the anger was obvious in Harvey's voice, he sounded like he was just about ready to rip someone's head off and Rachel had no doubt that the target in his mind for head-ripping was none other than her wholesome captor.

Rachel shook her head, wishing that she could just disappear and then she wouldn't have to sit there and straight out lie to Harvey's face, how much longer could she keep up the charade?

He already suspected something more went on while she was held hostage, and she'd barely even said anything.

Rachel was about to finally say something when another person entered the room.  
Gordon entered the room, looking tired, stressed and had bruises and scratches from the explosion Rachel guessed.

"Oh my god… are you okay?" Rachel asked worriedly at Gordon's haggard look.

Gordon chuckled "I should be asking you that Rachel, how are you doing?" he asked kindly looking over all her injuries, his eyes stopping at the bandaged wound on her face.

Rachel didn't understand why that bothered her so much, she knew there was a bandage there but she couldn't help but feel extremely angry that Gordon was currently looking at it rather her.

"I'm okay… I'd be better if I could actually move but I'm okay"

"Good.. that's good, so Rachel I've got some questions for you, you see we've got nothing on this guy, no finger prints or DNA in the computers, no name.. Nothing…. So did you find anything out about him while you were with him…Anything at all?" Gordon took a seat next to her across from Harvey.

Rachel bit her lip, a nervous habit that always seemed to pop up at inconvenient times.

"Not really…. Out of all the talking-"

Harvey cut her off, "I thought you said you two barely talked?"  
The slight suspicious tone in his voice caught Rachel off guard, she wasn't used to hearing Harvey speak to her like that, as if she'd done something wrong and he was about to accuse her.

Her eyes flickered to Harvey's and she couldn't help but glare at him slightly

"_We_ didn't…. he did, but out of all the talking _he_ did he didn't say a lot"

Gordon frowned "What do you mean?"

Rachel chuckled, "The Joker talks a lot, I think he likes to hear the sound of his own voice…but He didn't say anything about himself"

"Name?" Gordon asked sounding hopeful for any small amount of information that could help them.

Rachel felt a smile pull at her lips but forced herself to hide it; she didn't need Harvey any more suspicious that he already was, she didn't want to cause him any more pain either.

"He said his name was Steve"

"Steve?" Harvey said raising his eyebrow.

"Yeah… he was lying" Rachel said rolling her eyes, remembering their game of 20 questions, he never answered hers and that still kind of pissed her off.

"Did you see him without the makeup… could we get an artist to draw what you saw?" Gordon asked the hopefulness still in his voice.

"Not really…… he never came in without the makeup….." Rachel didn't want to announce that she had seen parts of his face without the makeup, that she had been the one to wipe the makeup away, not with Harvey in the room anyway.

Rachel gasped suddenly remembering something, oh but she had seen him without the makeup.  
The image of the beautiful boy in the photograph entered her mind, the young man that part of her had held onto.

"But…. There was this chest of drawers… inside there was a photograph….and in the photograph there was a boy, about 17 years old and this boy I recognized"

Both Gordon and Harvey perked up at this; Rachel noticed that they both seemed to be on the edge of their seat waiting for what would come next.

"….Who?"

Rachel chuckled, which she'd been doing a lot lately, a habit that she'd picked up from The Joker  
"The Joker…. Before he got his scars I'm telling you, he was beautiful….something or someone took that kid away and turned him into a monster… I don't care what anyone says… He was a victim once too. of what I don't know…. But I don't think that kid is around anymore…"

without warning an image of a burning Jack card flickered through her mind sending shivers down her spine "…. just The Joker"

Both Gordon and Harvey were silent; both looked as though they didn't know what to say.

Rachel felt herself begin to drift, feeling herself become distant and so far away from her hospital room. She was in a room filled with haunting darkness.  
Surrounded by emptiness.  
She had blood on her hands in this place, and the only sound she could hear were the clatter of a metal blade hitting the floor and distant voices and laughter.

"Something's can't be saved" she whispered.

Rachel felt wetness on her cheeks and soon realized that she'd been crying without even realizing it. Why she was crying exactly? She didn't know.

But the image of that Card burning, the image of The Joker's blood on her hands was too much for her emotionally.  
Her heart felt like it was breaking again, that fracture just kept widening.

Rachel felt a warm hand gently caress her cheek, and she turned to face Harvey

all traces of suspicion were gone from his look, now looking at her was her Harvey, the sweet warm and loving Harvey.

"Hey…..you okay?" he asked brushing some fly-away strands of hair from her pale face.

Rachel laughed wiping the tears away "Yeah... I'm just tired, must be the medication"

"Gordon, can she do this another time"

Gordon nodded "Of course, you just rest now, we'll find him" patting her hand gently

"We have people at the place he took you, they'll find the photograph, at least we'll have something to go on….. Get better okay" he said before turning to leave.

As he reached the door he suddenly stopped and turned back to face them.  
Reaching into his pocket he pulled out a plastic bag.  
Rachel eyed the plastic bag, as Gordon walked back towards them and handed it to her.

"when Harvey found you, this was with you. I thought we'd try and get some kind of evidence from it, but once again nothing".

Rachel felt herself tremble as she looked at the item in the bag.  
There sitting in the bag was a Jack card, the Jack card that The Joker gave to her.  
Scrawled in messy red ink or blood she couldn't tell, were the words,

_Just incase I need it  
_

"What does it mean?" Gordon asked.

Rachel shook her head unable to control the shaking that had wracked her body.  
"I-I … don't know… h-he gave it to me when I was with him…. Said he didn't like Jack's, that he had no use for them"

Gordon only nodded his head before saying goodbye and leaving Rachel and Harvey alone once again.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Harvey asked again still holding her hand in a vice-like grip.

Rachel nodded despite the fact that she was still trembling "I'm fine….just tired"

Harvey nodded before standing up to exit the room  
"I'll be back; I just have to make a phone call".

Soon Rachel was alone again; gently she took the card out of the bag and looked at it closer.  
'Just incase I need it?' Rachel thought, 'what the hell does he mean by that?'

Rachel was frustrated and upset and scared and she didn't know how she was meant to feel anymore.

For now she just wanted to sleep, sleep and forget about everything.  
For some odd reason the Jack card was a source of comfort, odd but true.  
Grasping the card in her hand, Rachel closed her eyes.

* * *

_hi ya!  
don't worry Joker makes a return to the story next chapter  
I'll try and have it up in the next few days  
take care of yourselves people!  
xx_


	22. Chapter 22 Splintering

_wow this took a long time mainly because i've been bed ridden for the past week with a chest infection something i get like every month... yeah damn my weak immune system i need a lung transplant or something  
anyone willing to donate their lungs send em' my way kiddies!  
_hope you enjoy the long awaited chapter  
and thanks to every single person who read and reviewed and who is bothering to read the author notes xD  
disclaimer : i do not own anything except plot and... Mara Lewis.. yeah i own her YOU CAN'T HAVE HER!.

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter twentytwo - Splintering

The Joker looked at his reflection; it looked the same as it always did.  
His eyes sunken within deep black kohl, the skin of his face cracked where the white paint had peeled slightly.  
His lips smeared red and the haunting smile that forever laced his features red as if they were forever dripping with blood.

He looked the same, he knew he did.  
Then how come whenever he caught a glimpse at himself in the mirror he saw something different.  
Sure he saw the face that everyone saw, the black white and red splattered across his face, but now standing in front of the mirror he saw something else hidden away behind the makeup.  
For the first time in a long time he'd caught a glimpse of someone he killed a long time ago, someone who was dead and buried.  
Just for a second it seemed this person echoed through the face paint.

Nobody else would notice a thing, but he could see it. Joker could tell, he wasn't stupid he knew the glimpse of a face; he'd seen it many times in his life. In fact he'd seen this face every day for the first nineteen years of his life.

The Joker frowned at his reflection and felt his fists clench, his dirt ridden fingernails digging into the skin of his palm.  
NO! This was wrong... this was so wrong.

It was only small this tiny essence of his past self creeping through but it was enough to make him sick. He felt his stomach churn with nausea. He was a simple man, had what many people would call a strong stomach.  
He had to with the amount of blood letting he did on a daily basis; he didn't have the time to get a queasy stomach.

But now for the first time in what felt like an eternity he felt the tell tale signs of illness.  
Thankfully he was alone and nobody could witness this break down.  
Except his reflection of course.  
That amused face staring back at him, slightly hidden and worn by years of neglect.  
But it was still there and he recognised him. The face he'd caught a glimpse of, the one he'd let loose for a second when he was wrapped up in _her_ arms. He was there now half laughing at him and half looking at him in disgust.

Helloooo _Jack... long time no see long time no see long time no see Jack Jack Jack!  
_The Joker gasped, what the hell was going on!  
But the mantra in his head continued, _long time no see...Jack... Oh look at you, you're so pathetic.  
Hidden away but you're still the same little boy, YOU'RE PATHETIC JACK!_

The Joker felt himself tremble slightly, unsure whether it was because he suddenly felt overwhelmed with anger or the rising sickness in his gut.  
It...Probably both.

No, NO! He was not letting him out again to play; he had to go back where he came from, back into the depths of his mind, back into the black recesses of his cold dead heart.

But the glimpse wouldn't leave, it was there, so tiny but so alive under the surface. Still calling out to him, the voices in his head laughing and screaming at him and it was disgusting, so wrong and disgusting.  
This _kid_ was choking him and now more than ever The Joker wished for death, he wished for the sweet calmness and peace it would bring just for it to be finished.  
He could live life in chaos and wreak havoc and misery and prove a point and have fun but not when _he _was still there  
Jack was Crawling his way out of the locked room inside his head.

This was her fault... she'd done this to him, for that one second The Joker was Jack Napier again.  
The human within the monster.  
For that second as he was completely wrapped up in her, her cries of agony and pleasure contorting her face in the most beautiful of ways he knew that these things always ended, the point being that he never wanted it to.  
Addictions only end if you let them, he remembered saying to her, but this was all consuming and he didn't know whether he wanted to kill her or screw her brains out.

_'You... Beautiful Bitch' _The Joker thought his body shaking with anger.

Rachel had seen it, the look on her face showed that as his face was an inch from hers.  
And for that one incredible time consuming aching second he was hers and she had complete control over him.

He covered it up quickly burying Jack where he belonged and letting the sick amusement out in familiar laughter and flicks of his knife across her beautiful face.

Rachel Dawes... she was so human... And she was everything he wasn't; she represented everything he hated... She represented Jack. The Joker didn't know whether to love her or hate her for that.

_Awww... and Jack makes another appearance in the house of cards  
Jacks...Jokers... the line is thinning  
_the voice laughed in his head.  
The Joker felt a yell rip from his throat before his fist launched into the reflection in front him.  
The mirror cracked in different directions, splintering and sending small shards of glass into his fist.  
The Joker giggled looking at the now distorted image in the mirror.  
Pieces of his face jagged and cracked... And empty  
just the way he liked them.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rachel sighed, god was she bored. The pain was dwindling now, but the medication they still had her on was making her drowsy..Drowsy and bored.  
Her eyes wondered around the hospital room, everything was so bland.  


Colourless and lifeless it seemed.  
Her world was so different than it had been only a few weeks prior, now everything that had once seemed normal seemed so boring and monotonous.  
Was this how a normal person was meant to live?  
Rachel knew she had more excitement in her life than most people but for some reason it was not enough.  
She had everything she needed, friends an excellent job and she had Harvey Dent as her sort-of-fiancé yet something felt off when she thought about it now.  
Sitting alone in the hospital room for hours with nothing to do but think had really got her wondering about her life and where it was going and what was currently occurring in said life.

'Where's the fire' Rachel thought glumly, 'currently blowing up half of Gotham city' another voice said.  
Rachel frowned, at the moment she didn't know what to feel about The Joker.  
She was afraid of what was happening inside her. She hated him in many ways, he'd cut her up and used her and abused her and threw her away and yet she couldn't hate him the way she should.

_Hate...love... the line is thinning_

Rachel shook her head trying to get rid of the pesky voice that had begun to inhabit her mind.  
She wished she had someone to talk to, other than herself because that was really beginning to scare her.  
Lusty wrong feelings for _insane_ clowns and talking to oneself...just one more step towards craziness.

Just when she felt like she might die from boredom a familiar and much welcomed face entered her room, smiling that beautiful familiar smile that always made Rachel warm and filled with nostalgia.

"Bruce!" she all but yelled, trying to sit up and failing.

"Hey... damsel got yourself in another mess I see" he said chuckling, taking a seat next to her bed.

Rachel laughed "I can't help it if I'm like a magnet for psycho's...must be a part of my charm".

Bruce smiled "I guess you are".

Despite the humorous tone in his voice Rachel could tell that it was forced on Bruce's part, mainly because of the tired and worried look in his eyes.

"Hey I know I look horrible and all... but at least I won't need a costume for Halloween... I'll just bring my face" Rachel said trying to make light of the situation, but Bruce did not laugh and the forced smile was gone from his features.

Bruce shook his head in despair unable to meet her eyes "Rachel... I'm sorry" he said quietly his voice filled with regret and guilt.

Rachel frowned at her oldest friend, the tone in his voice filled with such guilt, oh the weight this man carried on his shoulders. It was a surprise that he didn't buckle from the weight of always carrying it around.

One person shouldn't have to deal with so damn much.

"Bruce... don't you dare feeling guilty.. this is not your fault!".

Bruce scoffed "But it is... you wouldn't have been taken if it wasn't for me, The Joker only took you to get to me... I put you in that situation! Then he escapes and comes after you again... I put you in the hospital twice!"

Rachel swallowed, it started out that way yes, but Rachel knew differently.  
It started out as a way to get to Batman, a way to truly piss him off.

The Joker wanted to see how far The Batman would go to save her, proving the depth of their relationship it was only an amount of time before he narrowed the list of people that close to her.  
He already knew that she'd had a relationship with Batman that would eventually lead to one name.  
Bruce Wayne.

That's how it started, to make Batman tick and to use his hatred for Harvey Dent and his cause to prove his point. Everyone is a villain.

But something had changed she knew it, the moment The Joker told her of her likeness to chaos.  
It was becoming less and less about Batman and Harvey and more about making _her_ tick.

They would be blind to it, thinking that this was all about them, and she'd lie.  
Because that's what Rachel Dawes did now. Lie to the people she loved to hide her secret, and to make sure nobody found out just how far she'd already fallen.

"Don't be stupid..." She held his hand in her own, rubbing soothing circles with her thumb.

"I'm not Rach... I'm being realistic... _all_ of this _is_ my fault... people are dying... and its because of me because of Batman...I thought I could do this, I thought I could make a difference and all I do is end up hurting the people I love"  
Bruce cupped her cheek in his hand and Rachel leaned into his touch.

These moments, these precious moments with Bruce always confused the hell out of her.  
She loved Harvey and she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him but sometimes when ever Bruce would just look at her, his dancing familiar eyes filled with love and past memories or touch her in a certain way she'd get those small doubts.  
Bruce, her earth shattering love.

But it was a love that could never be, because she couldn't share him, she wanted Bruce Wayne not Batman and the line between them was so thin now she knew there was no way to separate them.

_The line is thinning... _

Rachel smiled "I'm fine though...its takes a lot more than that to keep me down you should know that by now".

A small smile appeared on Bruce's face and Rachel was thankful for it, the smile no matter how small it was meant that he hadn't completely given up.

"You are making a difference; Batman is making a difference to this city... You know what they say right; things have to get worse before they get better".

Rachel didn't know whether she even believed the words that were coming out of her mouth.  
But she had to say something; she couldn't let Bruce simply give up everything that he'd been working for with batman.

Bruce shook his head, everything about him just screamed that he'd given up, and that hurt Rachel more than she could bare.

"You can't just give up" she said hearing the own hysterical edge in her voice.  
Bruce smiled "Its time I said goodbye to it, hand the reins to someone else...Gotham's hero needs a face, and we both know who that is".

Rachel felt a small amount of pride, yes she did know. Her Harvey was the face of Gotham's salvation.  
But Batman was the meaning behind it.  
"Bruce... Gotham needs you, it needs both of you, you give up hope everything that we've been working for will just go to nothing"

Bruce didn't say anything but with the way he was currently looking at her Rachel knew what he was thinking about. She said if Bruce ever gave up Batman that they'd be together.  
Though a part of her wished that that could be true she knew it was too late for that and she doubted that Bruce could ever really give up Batman.

"I'm still sorry..." he whispered kissing her cheek softly.

"I know... even though you have no right to be" she laughed quietly.

"I love you" he said gently  
Rachel smiled "I love you too".

"So..." Bruce said deciding that a change of subject was necessary. "Where is Harvey?"

"I'm not sure, he went to make a phone call and then said that he had to go and that he'd be back later that was a two hours ago" Rachel suddenly felt worry within her. Where was Harvey? Maybe they'd found the Joker and were doing some interrogating or maybe something horrible had happened.  
To whom... she didn't want to think about. Was she more worried about Harvey or The Joker? She asked herself.

"You don't think...something's happened do you?" Rachel asked .

"No... I'm sure he's fine-"

"Hello Miss Dawes we got a gift for you" a friendly voice echoed into the room cutting Bruce off mid sentence.  
Rachel frowned as she saw her friendly hyperactive nurse Mara enter the room with a dozen red roses.  
The roses were beautiful no doubt about it, each petal of each flower beautifully arranged, the red so deep it was quite blinding, so red that it was almost disturbing, especially to her.  
The red looked like blood to Rachel.

"A prezzie?... for me?" Rachel said with mock excitement.

Mara looked giddy as she put the flowers on the bench near her bed.

"So it would seem, my god look at them, they are beautiful!- and OH MY GOD!... Bruce Wayne is currently sitting at your bedside!" she gasped eyeing Bruce as if he was some famous movie star.  
In a way Rachel guessed he was, just minus the movie star part, but he certainly was a celebrity.

Bruce smiled politely at the shocked Mara "Yes that's me".

Mara flashed her 100-watt grin that seemed to light up her face "I'm Mara, but you can call me... Well just Mara actually"  
Rachel and Bruce laughed.

Turning to Rachel Mara gasped "You didn't tell me you knew Bruce freaking Wayne... my god he's even better looking in the flesh"  
Rachel rolled her eyes, she'd met Mara Lewis the first time she'd been in the hospital after her little captivity with The Joker and she was instantly surprised by the amount of energy the girl seemed to have, it was a breath of fresh air.  
In these hard times it was nice to meet someone looking towards happier things instead of the unfair cruel world.

"Uh... thankyou?" Bruce said laughing slightly.  
Mara winked at him in what Rachel guessed was supposed to be in a sexy come-hither kind of way.  
Bruce smirked but blushed slightly and Rachel bit her lip to keep from laughing.

Smirking Bruce was the Bruce Wayne play-boy persona, blushing Bruce was the shy Bruce she'd grown up with, it seemed little Brucie didn't know how to take Nurse Mara.

Bruce turned to Rachel and glared at her obvious amusement, it only made her want to laugh more.  
Bruce cleared his throat "So, who are they from then?" he asked gesturing to roses.

Mara shrugged "I don't know the man was wearing a clown mask, he just said to make sure that they got to Miss Rachel Dawes"

Clown mask? Rachel tensed instantly... one of The Joker's goons or The Joker himself in a mask? Rachel wondered.  
Would The Joker go to all the trouble to buy... or steal a bunch of Roses and send them to her personally when he was currently Gotham's most wanted?

Rachel frowned, actually that sounded exactly like something that he would do.  
Bruce's eyes narrowed and Rachel knew that he had his suspicions on who it was as well.

"Clown mask?" Bruce asked his voice dark with anger.

Mara nodded, "Couldn't see his face at all, but he sounded sexy...you know in case you were wondering" she said winking at Rachel "yeah it was weird I mean especially with that homicidal Joker guy on the loose, who would wear a clown mask to-OH!" she said nodding in realisation.

Rachel met Bruce's gaze and she knew that he was beyond pissed at his new arch nemesis.

"...Was there ...um a card?" Rachel said her heart beating frantically in anxiety and excitement.

Mara looked through the roses for a second before handing a gift card to Rachel  
"Voila... gift card from your clown"

Rachel didn't know why she felt the need to say something but it came out before she could even think about it.

"He's not my clown!"

Mara raised her eyebrows at Rachel's defensive reaction and her eyes instantly went to the card in her hands.  
'Stupid Stupid Stupid Rachel!' she thought feeling the colour rise in her cheeks, she didn't want to even see what Bruce's expression was.

Instead she focused all her attention on the gift card.  
It was colourless except for the red lettering HA'S covering the front.  
Rachel couldn't help but roll her eyes, typical of her captor.  
She felt her breath catch in her throat as she slowly opened the card to read what kind of twisted confusing message he'd decided to leave for her now.

"So...what does Sir Freaky clown say?" Mara said peering over Rachel's shoulder.

"_Each petal holds none to the beauty of your smile,  
catching fire and burning its way into my heart  
Red smiles glistening in the pale moonlight  
dancing hand in hand into the night  
the world falling and being devoured by the dark  
ripping each other open just to revel in the pain  
our bleeding smiles forever insane"_

Rachel's fingers trembled as sh_e _read over the words again and again, she didn't know how to react to them. Once again The Joker was talking a whole lot yet still not saying much at all.

But the words Rachel squeezed her eyes shut and imagined The Joker's voice muttering them into her ear, his voice pushing its way into her soul with such beauty... twisted beauty but beauty nonetheless.

No one had ever written poetry to her before, it was stupid and immature but some part of her got a thrill that The Joker had written such words to her personally even if they were sinister in nature.

"Wow..." Mara said.  
It was only then that Rachel remembered that Bruce and Mara were still in the room.

Mara's eyes were wide and she had a small smile on her face "I have to say... the guy is a freak but that is beautiful...weird and demented but ...beautiful. Your clown sure has a way with words".

Rachel was only half listening; her mind was somewhere else, with him once again. She was in deep she knew it. He'd slashed her face open and she'd already forgiven him and yearned to touch him again.

"He's not my clown" she whispered.

She was splintering, half of her was logical little miss DA the other part of her was thrill seeking Rachel Dawes desperate to touch the fire. She was becoming fragmented and damaged just like him.

* * *

_and we have OC FELLAS  
sigh i love Mara she's so fun to write she'll appear in later chapters too because i love her so_

actual jokachel interaction next chapter people so theres something to look forward to  
take care xx


	23. Chapter 23 Sick

_okay.. i admit this is kind of a filler chapter.. but you know what they say... filler chapters make the world go around...actually i don't think they've ever said that  
But hopefully you enjoy the filler chappiness filled with Jokachel...well fluff yep.. this kinda fluffy well as fluffy as Jokachel will ever really get anyway.  
_

Disclaimer : i own nothing ...

**Forbidden Chocolate - **yeah i thought if the Joker was ever romantic at all... it would be twisted... xD still twisted romantic is better than none romantic hahe.

**NightDragon8 - **oh man thank you for that awesome review... i'm glad that you thought that it 'fit' the joker because only after i posted did i begin to doubt myself... i thought perhaps it was a little out of character.. but people seemed to like it so hooray for me!

**jokerluver12089 -**ooooh your enthusiasm increases my enthusiasm so hooray for the enthusiasm! you think its good enough to get published?? oooh wow thankyou!!

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter twentythree - Sick

Rachel sat on her sofa; it was just a simple sofa any other person would say. What's the big deal over a sofa?  
But Rachel knew better, the sofa represented just another piece of evidence for her lies. Nobody else would be able to tell exactly what went on but Rachel would know and she would have to live with the guilt.

Rachel's nose wrinkled in disgust as she looked at the blood stains on the fabric. Blood that came from the bandaged wounds on her stomach.  
"Ugh..." Rachel gasped standing up unable to look at it any longer. She'd enjoyed that. That's the thought that sickened her the most. While The Joker was cutting her with his knife, his fingers working wonders inside her she had enjoyed both the intense pain and pleasure it bought her.  
It made her feel so alive.  
Rachel shook her head in disgust at herself 'Great... now I'm a pain loving freak' she thought huffing slightly.

Despite the disturbing memories that her apartment now held Rachel was glad to be home.  
Hospitals always did creep her out, ever since she was a little girl, always too clean, empty and loud and chaotic and hospitals always had the smell of death in the air.  
Rachel shuddered, besides if she had to hear Mara talk about how gorgeous Bruce was for one more second she would explode.  
She liked Mara, she really did. Mara was nice and funny and certainly had a fantastic personality but constantly being in her company and with her constantly talking it tended to get a bit much.  
She hoped that they could be friends though, preferably outside of hospital walls.

The doctor's finally said that she was well enough to go home unfortunately she now had more wounds to take care of with dressing and bandaging. Bruce had driven her home and she still hadn't heard anything from Harvey, she never found out exactly where he went.  
Now that she thought about it more, it was annoying her. Was he keeping secrets from her now?  
Rachel knew she had no right to feel so betrayed seeing as she was keeping dirty secrets of her own but it hurt that Harvey hadn't bothered to tell her what was going on.  
Even if it was to protect her, the over protecting act got old fast.

So Bruce drove her home, the first thing she did was go to sleep. Rachel hated the fact that she was so tired considering that she'd done nothing but sleep while she was in the hospital but it kind of felt like every muscle in her body was screaming for her to sleep.

Sleep was easier she didn't have to think about the messy situation she was in when she was asleep.  
Things were easier to handle, unless of course she had those dreams.  
Rachel frowned as she thought back to the many dreams she had through the night, most of them containing some form of The Joker.  
The weirdest one though, the one that had Rachel feeling dizzy was the one in which she kept calling him Jack.

She didn't know why but in the dream the name Jack seemed to fit, she supposed it was because of the Jack card that he gave her. Now that Rachel thought about it more, in a weird way the name Jack did fit The Joker.  
In this dream not only did she know him by his name but he visited her often, every night in fact.

Rachel closed her eyes, in her dream she reached out to the door knob of her apartment and she knew standing there in the somewhat misty hall that 'Jack' would be inside waiting for her again, because in this dream he was always there.  
In the dream her feelings for him were unclear; half of her was petrified of the man the other half was glad he was there.  
When she saw him in her apartment, he looked like The Joker only different, younger and seemed to have less anger and hate inside him. In the dream though he had the makeup and the scars he still had the adorable 

playful twinkle in his eye like he did in the photograph she found.  
Rachel felt an unwelcome grin pull at her mouth, she couldn't help it... she liked that twinkle. It was light and not nearly as intense as the normal feelings and emotions that came with The Joker.

Rachel remembered the smirk that was on his face too, again much like the boy in the photograph. He said something... but she couldn't remember what it was.  
Rachel frowned... it was something she should remember... but it seemed so muffled and fuzzy when she thought about it now.

What _was_ it?! Rachel thought desperately. She could see him in her mind, she could see his mouth moving his tongue snaking out to lick his lips but the words coming out of his mouth were inaudible over the static she now heard in her head.

She was upset about something in the dream. Rachel could remember the horror and heart wrenching pain that had filled her heart upon seeing the man she knew as Jack.  
It was weird, he looked like the Joker, he _was_ the Joker and still Rachel saw something else inside him too.  
Rachel groaned in frustration, why couldn't she remember what he said??  
It felt important somehow, Rachel didn't really know why she felt that way but she did.

"I forgive you..." Rachel whispered to herself, then frowned that's what he said? Why was that so important and what the hell did it mean to her?  
Rachel shook her head; her brain really came up with the oddest things sometimes.

Rachel walked into her kitchen and pulled a knife from her drawer in order to prepare her breakfast. Her stomach rumbled loudly, she was grateful for the fact that she was now at home and could cook her own meals.  
Hospital food sucked.

Rachel suddenly stopped as she looked at the knife in her hand, something pulled in her heart and as she looked at her reflection in the blade, something felt familiar holding this knife, she could almost imagine blood dripping from it... she could almost imagine the blade imbedded in some bodies flesh.  
she screamed dropping the knife; it made a loud clang when it hit the tiled floor of her kitchen.  
Something was so familiar about this entire thing, the visions in her head, knives imbedded in flesh, the sound of a knife hitting the floor.  
This was like that dream, the haunting blood soaked dream where she stabbed The Joker.

Rachel felt sick just remembering it... how odd "I forgive you" Rachel whispered again suddenly feeling extremely faint.

She'd stabbed The Joker in that dream while she was held captive, watched him fall to the ground while laying in a pool of his own blood and now she'd had a dream of him saying 'I forgive you' it was too weird and not something that Rachel wanted to think about it. It seemed almost prophetic.

Rachel was pulled out of her thoughts when there was a knock on the front door.  
It was probably Harvey finally coming to fill her in on what had gone on the night before; it would be good to finally be in the loop.

When she opened the door she was surprised by a grinning Joker leaning against her door frame.

"Gooood Morning Sunshine!" he drawled lazily.

Rachel opened her mouth to say something along the lines of 'what the hell do you think you're doing here you bastard' but all that came out was a surprised squeak when The Joker suddenly collapsed in her arms.

The weight and strain of his body caused pain to erupt from the wounds on her stomach and Rachel yelled out in pain as she felt her stitches pulling. 'First rule of stitches' Rachel thought gasping through her pain 'must remember not to move!'

Though he was still too heavy to hold up Rachel was shocked to see how light he was, he didn't look painfully thin when she'd seen him without his shirt but he felt it now.

He felt like he hadn't eaten a proper meal in a _very _long time. Rachel guessed taking care of himself wasn't something that was much of a priority.

Rachel's eyes instantly scanned his body looking for blood, she wouldn't be too surprised if he'd gone out and gotten himself into even more trouble. It was expected.

There was nothing there except for what seemed like tiny pieces of glass imbedded in his knuckles hardly life threatening and she doubted he suddenly got a queasy stomach at the site of his blood and promptly passed out.

she bit her lip as she looked at his unconscious form. He looked different... vulnerable.  
This moment was one of those moments that she'd thought about, something that she could never imagine The Joker doing, sleeping and she supposed he was kind of sleeping now.  
His face looked somewhat boyish despite all the makeup.

He looked fine... so why was she currently sitting on the floor holding him in her doorway?

Rachel lifted up his shirt, hoping to god that he didn't suddenly decide to wake up at that moment.  
She smiled slightly when she saw that he still had her bandage job for his broken rib.

She lightly ran her fingers over his skin and really _really_ hoped that he didn't wake up then. His skin was marred with many different scars, each one telling a story, Rachel couldn't help but feel curious about how he got each and every one, there was so much to learn about this man and she could not deny that she wanted to learn.

He was warm... Rachel frowned as she ran her fingers over his skin, he was really warm. Her eyes flickered to his sleeping face; beads of sweat were on his brow and ran down his face smudging some of the makeup.  
His body began to shake slightly like he was extremely cold all of a sudden.  
she was surprised by the concern that filled her.

He was shaking uncontrollably; unconscious, sweating and extremely hot... something was really wrong here. Rachel ran her fingers over The Joker's hot cheek unconsciously caressing it with her fingers covering them with white paint.

The Joker groaned making Rachel nearly jump out of her skin.  
Opening his eyes slowly he said "You know... if you wanted to get up close and personal with my assets you didn't have to wait until I was unconscious"

His eyes wondered and his face was a picture of confusion when he realised that he was half lying on the floor and half lying in her arms.  
"Say..Miss Dawes why am I on the floor?"

Rachel raised her eye brows "Uh... you were unconscious?".

The Joker nodded "Oh...yeah riiight... i re-mem-berr... why was I unconscious?" he said frowning.

Rachel shrugged "You tell me... you're the one that comes to my door, knocks then passes out!"

Her frowned deepened when The Joker didn't have any come back for her; okay... something was _really_ wrong with him. When The Joker suddenly loses all ability to be a smart-ass...it's a bad sign.

"...Are you okay?" She asked not being able to keep the slight chuckle in anymore, simply seeing The Joker of all people so confused was amusing.

"I..._don't know..._hmmm".

"Okay... get up" with Rachel's help The Joker got up and swayed slightly on his feet.

"That's funny... I don't remember getting drunk" he muttered before giggling Only the giggle was different than The Joker's normal sinister giggle, it was like he was somewhat delirious.

The Joker suddenly turned to face Rachel "Tsk.. no no Raachel... turn that frown upside down... wouldn't want to get ...wrinkles on the pretty face" lifting his finger he smoothed out the crease between her eyes.

The gesture itself would normally have filled her with anger but in The Joker's delirious state it was nothing but amusing.

Rachel lead him to her couch, ordering him to sit down, she didn't think she would be able to help lift him up if he decided the floor was a good place for a nap again, the wounds on her stomach were too painful and she knew the pulling she felt when she caught The Joker was not a good sign.

Standing in front of his sitting position on the couch Rachel eyed him warily. There was still sweat pouring off his skin and his makeup had begun to run making him look even more demented.  
She placed her hand on his forehead and flinched when the heat of his skin burned her hand slightly.

"So... what's the prognosis Nurse Rachel?" he asked his voice sounding less delirious and lazier now that he was sitting down.

"I think you're sick" Rachel said walking to the medicine cabinet in her bathroom.  
When she returned she had a thermometer in her hand and The Joker's eyes widened.

"...I am not sick... I don't _get sick" _he said glaring at the item in her hand.

"Oh you are sick...you're _very very _sick in fact... This nurse recommends you seek psychiatric help immediately"

The Joker smirked "Ha...ha...ha...well you've been making an awful lot of jokes lately Miss Dawes not acting like yourself _at all_ maybe you're the one who needs the psychiatric help"

"Or maybe... you're just a bad influence on me...now open up" Rachel ordered trying to force the thermometer in his mouth.

"You'll not be sticking anything in this mouth...unless you're into kink and it's something _diritier_" he wiggled his eyebrows at her and Rachel rolled her eyes before jamming it in his mouth forcefully much in the same way he did to her with his knife.  


The Joker groaned and Rachel gave a triumphant laugh.  
"Yeah... it's not nice having items forced into your mouth is it" she smirked.

The Joker only glared more.  
'Not so full of Jokes anymore are we' she thought.

Rachel looked down at the thermometer and her felt her eyes go wide; okay this was not good.  
"I told you I'm not sick..." The Joker mumbled sounding like a young child wanting to go out and play.

Rachel turned the thermometer around so The Joker could see it "Look... you're hot!."

A grin appeared on The Joker's face and Rachel mentally slapped herself for not thinking before she said something, she really ought to learn some self control when it came to talking especially when she was around The Joker.

"Think I'm hot do you...Always knew you were secretly in love with me". He said giggling.

Rachel rolled her eyes "Shut up you bastard you know what I'm talking about!".  
She gritted her teeth in anger.

"Ooo-kay... I'm sick... but why do you _care_" The Joker's eyes stared into hers and Rachel could tell that his gaze was a knowing one; he knew exactly what was going on inside her.

"I...don't care" Rachel said .,... suddenly the room was spinning slightly and it was beginning to get very hot, she felt like she was burning up, this couldn't be simply from his penetrating eyes? And my god why was her wounds hurting so much all of a sudden?

The Joker grabbed her wrist yanking her towards him but she struggled trying to wiggle her way out of his grasp.  
"Let me go... I might catch something" she whispered.

"Aw... well I'm hurt"

Rachel glared "Pay backs a bitch"  
This only made the Joker grin more.

Rachel's skin felt like it was on fire, every nerve ending on her body felt like it was being scorched and for once it was not in a good way. It was more of an oh my god I'm burning from the inside out kind of way.  
She was in so much pain her guts felt like they were being yanked out through the stitches in her stomach but she forced her face to be blank not wanting The Joker to see her vulnerable.

"_Touché... looove_ the bandaged up look by the way... really suits you...especially the blood... really adds to the whole look".

Rachel's eyes narrowed in confusion... huh? Why was her vision suddenly getting so blurry?  
Looking down she whimpered when she saw blood soaked through her shirt.

"_Damn it!" _she muttered before collapsing forward, The Joker's arms wide in position to catch her the last thing she saw before she blacked out.

* * *

_ugh i hate this chapter...  
but its up now and if you like it well thats good enough for me  
review folks!!  
_


	24. Chapter 24 Masochist

_hey dudes sorry for the wait ..again_

_Year 11 presentation ball was on saturday And WOW what an awesom night with all the getting presented and the big ball gowns and the dancing... Trinity Waltz and all. and the partiness and the photo's and then the after ball partiness... then the extreme headache that comes with said partiness the next day  
ugh...  
_

SO thats_ why this took longer to get up. but i hope you like it cos i think its alright xD woo hoo for me  
Disclaimer : don't own it... but one day i plan to steal it MWAHAHAH_

* * *

_**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**_

Chapter twentyfour - Masochist

Rachel's eyes fluttered open her vision was blurred and she could only just make out the image of a dark figure leaning across her bed.  
Wait... why was she lying on her bed?  
Rachel frowned, running over all the images in her mind piecing together what happened and how she ended up in bed.  
She remembered the knocking on her door and The Joker stricken with fever then she remembered the searing pain and dizziness she felt before...nothing.  
She couldn't remember anything after that, the only thing coming to mind being darkness.  
It looked like she'd been knocked unconscious again, probably by the Joker.

Now that blurry figure standing over bed who was that?  
Rachel couldn't make out who it was but there was an odd air of familiarity about him that made her feel somewhat comforted and overwhelmed with anxiety... there was only one person in the world that made her feel like that.

The dark figure seemed to be sitting beside her bed leaning over her stomach. It was then that Rachel remembered the wounds on her stomach that she'd acquired from the Joker's knife.

She knew the dark figure now,  
"What are you doing here" she groaned out trying to move but was pushed down by the Joker's hands.

"Oh you're up I see" he muttered quietly "Well, Rachel unless you wanted me to simply leave you there on your floor with icky substances oozing from your body you should be saying thank you to me"

Rachel's eyes wondered to her stomach where The Joker was currently wiping away blood from her wounds, oh crap she thought remembering the sensation of her stitches pulling.

"I ripped my stitches out" she whispered feeling her stomach flip flop around inside her gut.

"Yes you did... luckily you didn't rip all of them out... geez you're such a clutz sometimes sweetheart" he said mockingly. But the normal laughter that would of filled his voice was absent.  
Rachel frowned as she watched The Joker's face as he wiped away her blood.

Sweat dripped from his skin and a lot of the white paint that usually marred his face was absent too.  
Rachel felt her heart rate increase, this was the closest she'd ever come to seeing the Joker without makeup, okay so sure she'd seen the photograph and he did still have the black circles surrounding his eyes and the red lipstick smudged across his lips. But everything was smeared and fainter than normal.  
She could see his skin, the real colour of his skin shone through the faint white makeup.

'He's so beautiful' she thought to herself watching him clean her wound 'it's such a shame...beauty wasted'.

Rachel looked at his hands, they were trembling as he wiped away the blood with a wash cloth she recognised from her bathroom.

"How are you?" she asked remembering his sickness.

"I'm absolutely peachy...and you?" he asked blankly.

Rachel rolled her eyes "You know what I mean... you're sick..How are you feeling because I clearly remember you were having convulsions in my doorway".

"I feel like I've been doused with Butane then lit on fire...yeaah kind of like that" he laughed his mouth turning outwards into a sinister grin.

Rachel felt her stomach churn feeling the disturbing image enter her mind. All she could see was a man standing in dark room completely covered in burning flames, his white flesh melting away from his bone but his ever present red mouth wide in a loud thundering laugh.

His voice brought her out of her thoughts.  
"Hmm... Would you look at that...? Time to stitch you back together Miss Dawes" he said picking up a needle and thread.  
Rachel felt every muscle in her body tense as her eyes zoomed in on the suddenly extremely sharp looking needle.

"W-what... where did you f-find that?" she asked her voice shaking.

The Joker rolled his eyes "In your sewing kit under your bathroom sink of course... Beautiful you'd think that you'd know where you kept things seeing as this ...is your apartment.

Rachel felt herself flinch away from the Joker; she'd always hated sharp objects especially when they were in close proximity to her skin. But lately with the Joker she found she had been somewhat seeking out the pain that said sharp objects would cause.  
But the thought of that needle actually piercing her already painful wounds made her want to run away and hide.

"There is absolutely no way that you're going to do it" Rachel shrieked angrily pointing to the needle in his hand.

The Joker giggled before sighing dramatically getting frustrated "Well unless you want to go to the hospital again, where you of course would have to explain to precious Harvey and pals' how you ... Ripped your stitches out...then yes I am absolutely doing it...of course if you want to do it yourself... that's fine too".

Rachel hesitated, she could go to the hospital...again but the thought made her feel sick. Being inside those walls again would drive her more insane than she already was and like The Joker said she would have to explain to Harvey and probably Bruce too how she got the stitches pulled out. That involved telling about her little encounters with The Joker. She didn't want to make Harvey any more suspicious than he already was and she didn't want to make Bruce any more worried and guilty than he already felt.  
She could lie, she knew that but the thought of lying again also made her sick. Rachel had already told so many lies over the last week and it was really making her heart hurt.

And she knew for sure that she definitely couldn't do it herself.

"Fine... do it" she whispered.

"I knew I could count on you... don't worry Rachel... like I said before...I've had a lot of practice" The Joker threaded the needle with an expertise that would put Rachel's grandmother to shame.  
Her grandmother was always a genius when it came to sewing up things she remembered watching her thread the needle without ever pricking a finger, which always really pissed Rachel off seeing as every time she even attempted to sew she'd embed the tip of the needle in her finger.  
But here the Joker was, threading the needle like it was simply second nature...for some reason the thought deeply disturbed Rachel... a lot of practise indeed.

The Joker suddenly stopped standing up and walking out of her bedroom.  
Rachel felt confusion well up inside her, where was he going now?  
She heard banging and crashing from the kitchen and she swore she could hear muttering and the Joker cursing as he searched for something in the kitchen.

When he came in he was smiling and he lifted up a bottle of Jack Daniels.  
"Well... Who knew Rachel Dawes and Jack were such good friends" the Joker said before stopping his face drawing a blank as he took in what he just said.

Rachel felt her brows knit in fear and confusion what was going on, this had to be the weirdest day she'd ever had, somehow she hoped that this was all some kind trippy dream caused by the medication the doctors put her on.

Suddenly The Joker chuckled before taking a seat next to her bed again he was shaking his head chuckling somewhere between being delirious with fever and the ever present amusement and cruel intentions anytime he was there.

"Who would have thought" he mumbled bitterly to himself.

"Now... Rachel the bottles half empty... been looking for some cold mind-numbing comfort have we... yeah I know how you feel if there's one friend in the world that you can always count on...its JD" he said before taking a swig from the bottle.  
He then poured the alcohol over Rachel's wound making her wince in pain.

He passed it to her and Rachel grimaced shaking her head in disgust.  
"Ewww..."

The Joker raised his eyebrows "Eww?... I found it in your kitchen".

"It's Harvey's" she said eyeing the dark bourbon distastefully.

"OH...Harveeey does have good taste" he said still forcing the bottle in her face.  
Rachel shook her head hoping that he'd get the message.

But he still continued to wave the bottle in her face, the liquid swishing back and forth as he swung the bottle like a pendulum.

"Uh...No thank you" Rachel said glaring at The Joker.

"Aw... come on Miss Dawes, why not try something new...after all what's life without a little...experimentation".

When Rachel still refused to drink the alcohol The Joker huffed angrily frustration written all over his features, it seemed he was less patient when he was sick Rachel thought.

"Look... You see this needle I am currently holding... its sharp... I'm going to put this needle in your skin... pull it out through the other side, the pain will be mind-numbing... but you won't have time for breath because then I'll do it again, threading this little piece of string through your flesh...over and over again... and you won't have any of that lovely pain-free juice they shoot you up with at the hospitals...so it looks like JD here is second best... now drink" he said lifting the bottle to her lips.  
Rachel eyed him curiously, as she held the bottle taking a large gulp of the putrid liquid.  
This was weird... The Joker... in his own sick twisted way was taking care of her.  
She'd put it down to the fever that was currently engulfing his body... melting his brain and other vital organs so it seemed.

"Ughhhh" Rachel groaned as the liquid burned her throat and warmed her insides.  
The Joker giggled "Yummy...Isn't it" he said before focusing his attention on the still bleeding wound on her stomach.

Rachel felt her eyes water as she swallowed more the burning substance "I think this could be the most disgusting thing I've ever had in my mouth".

"Aw...hush now Rachel... ... You're supposed to mix it with other drinks".

"I don't think anything could make this taste better".

"Quiet... you'll hurt Jack's feelings... maybe next time you're looking for some good old comfort dear Jack won't be there".

Rachel stared at him incredulous at his ability to make a joke out of every single situation in life. Was this how The Joker lived, just careened through life, going from town to town, putting chaos into everyone he meets and constantly making jokes so he never had to be serious about it.

"You're peculiar" she muttered

"Peculiar...? That's a new one... I've been called evil, a monster, sexy, vicious, anarchist, criminal, terrorist... "The Joker scoffed "Even a vigilante in one town... but never peculiar... hmm I'm going to take that as a compliment".

Rachel squeezed her eyes shut wishing that she could somehow smash her head against a wall, 'I can't believe I said that out loud' she whimpered to herself.

The Joker's hands were suddenly on her skin and Rachel gasped at the cold skin of his fingers as they brushed against the tender skin around her wounds.  
His skin sent tingles through her body.  
"Beautiful..." he nodded smiling cruelly at the wounds he inflicted on her.  
Rachel glared feeling anger boil within her.

"Oh yeah... because scars are really beautiful"

The Joker's mouth grinned, rows of yellow teeth showing, he was smiling but his face was bitter.  
Scars... Rachel could have punched herself, he knew all about scars he had to live with them every day on his face.

Rachel decided it was time to move the subject along.  
Her eyes wondered to his hand as they ran over her skin, eyes narrowing in on the pieces of jagged glass embedded in his knuckles.

"What happened to your hand?" she asked gesturing to his hand.

"...Evil Mirror said I was no longer the fairest of them all" The Joker said with mock sadness.

Rachel felt her lips twitch and the muscles in her face were pulling her lips into a smile but she forced it down, she was angry with him after all.

The urge to smile disappeared when she noticed that The Joker had placed the needle on her skin about to start restitching the wound back together. Rachel took a deep breath thankful that she hadn't ripped all of her stitches.

Taking another mouthful of Bourbon, she was also glad that she'd taken the Jack Daniels feeling the wonderful tingly feeling that the alcohol bought her hoping that it would numb the pain slightly.

"Here.We.Go" the Joker mumbled before piercing her skin.

A scream erupted from Rachel's throat; it certainly was mind-numbing pain.  
Only this time there wasn't the pleasant feeling of pleasure accompanied with the mind-numbing pain. Only the feeling of thread being worked inside her flesh mending it back together.

"Oh... my god Ow" Rachel gasped her hand flying to The Joker's shoulder, clutching at the material of his coat.

The Joker smirked "Doesn't it feel wonderful Rachel" he said continuing his work on her stomach.

"I don't think wonderful is exactly the word I was looking for" Rachel groaned.

"Pain is wonderful thing... it helps you to know... that you're really alive... without pain... We'd be nothing... embrace the pain Rachel... you'll be surprised how good it feels"

Rachel closed her eyes trying to block out the pain, but it didn't work. As another rip of pain radiated from her stomach Rachel decided to follow it and ride the waves of pain instead, it was intense.  
Like she was being forced off the edge of a cliff, feeling the wind rush through her being and the wonderful surreal feeling of almost flying for a fraction of a second before crashing into the jagged rocks below. The rocks piercing her skin in all different areas of her body, her blood staining the rocks red but she was alive, she knew this because she could see the blood and feel the pain... she was alive.

Rachel gasped feeling like every single area of her body was on fire...He was right... it was good... it was so good.

When she opened her eyes The Joker was smirking at her his hollow knowing eyes boring into hers like they always did.  
It scared her that she was beginning to get used to that.

"Well... Miss Dawes look who's becoming quite the masochist".

Rachel couldn't tear her eyes away from him, he was right... like he usually was.

She'd been trying to deny it for so long but it was no use any more. Time with the Joker always ended up in some form of pain but the feeling the pain brang was amazing... once you just accepted it.  
Pain was a part of life.  
You needed pain to truly be alive.

All this time she was afraid of pain, trying to protect herself from it and now here she was, seeking it. Wanting it.  
Wanting him

Because The Joker...he was pain.

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___eeeeek hehehehe i really like this chapter_

_xD Rachel is beginning to get really masochistic... just like our precious Joker xD_


	25. Chapter 25 Age

_eeek heres chapter 25.. cannot believe we are at 25.. i think we are about... half way through now  
Half way through dudes... thats like... only half more until we are done... .maybe  
Im not sure exactly how long this thing is .. it keeps changing!  
anyway i hope you like this chapter even though it definitely isn't my best.  
enjoy enjoy enjoy peoples who i love dearly .  
_

**ILoveColinFirth** - fav author? Really?? oh wow thanks so much! thats fantastic :) glad you like my story THAT much

**Aka Fuyu - **yes yes vivd pictures are good. i always read fanfics and books and what not and love the ones where you can really get a picture of whats going on in your head. xD so i hoped to create.. 'vivid pictures' for this story too! Thanks for the review!

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter Twentyfive - Age

Rachel's hands were still clinging to The Joker's coat, her hand clutching at his collar. The pain was horrible and wonderful at the same time, and it was beyond words that The Joker could give her this... almost like a gift albeit a painful gift but to not be afraid of pain anymore was like a weight off her shoulders. Was this how the Joker lived all the time, was this another reason why it was so hard to reason with him or threaten him because he simply did not care about the pain the world could inflict on him?

The Joker was finally finishing re-stitching her wounds and the pain had begun to fade away.  
Rachel felt distant, a part of herself was far away in a different time and place, she was barely there.  
Without even realising it she had begun to play with the greasy locks of hair that fell at The Joker's collar.  
Gently running her fingers through them.  
She only came back to reality when she felt The Joker stiffen underneath her clutching hand, making her remove her hand completely and letting it rest against her body.

She had to remember that, Intimate touchy-feely with The Joker was a no-no it always seemed to end with her in the hospital, something she'd rather not do again.

Rachel watched with curious eyes as The Joker cut the thread that had mended her broken flesh back together, this was...different.  
She was always so used to being the one that played nurse when she was with The Joker, this was something new and she wasn't quite sure how to act.

"This is so weird" Rachel muttered breaking the slightly uncomfortable silence that had begun to circulate in the room.  
"And what is that..." The Joker said.

"Well its just... I'm used to being the one that plays nurse and now here you are playing nurse to me"

The Joker's lips widened into an excited grin "You know... I _think _I have a nurse's uniform lying around somewhere...if you're into that kind of thing" he said licking his lips.

Rachel couldn't help but let a small smile appear on her face, when he said things like that it was without the sinister nature he usually carried around and that was something that Rachel liked.  
Besides the image of The Joker in a nurse's uniform was too hard not to smile at.

Sighing The Joker stood up from his position on the chair beside her bed "You'll live to see another day Miss Dawes... "  
The Joker got up and it was then that Rachel realised just how truly sick he really was, his normal haunting and confident stance was gone replaced with a somewhat shaky tired looking Joker.  
She was also surprised by the extremely unwelcome sympathy that came over her.

It was wrong to feel sympathy for something that had no feelings Rachel told herself.  
He was empty inside... and even when she saw something it was just a lie, everything about The Joker was just painful empty hollow lies!

That's what she kept telling herself, but seeing the Joker stumble his way over to the other side of her bed was quite amusing and yet somehow it seems wrong and sad to see The Joker like that.

The Joker finally reached his destination and flopped on the bed next to her sinking into the sheets.

Rachel turned her head to face him, she wouldn't dare move she may have moved on from the fear of pain but she wasn't quite ready for the disturbing pulling sensation that she knew would occur if she moved too fast. It would be a real inconvenience if she somehow pulled out her stitches again and she doubted that The Joker would be generous enough to restitch them a second time.

She actually doubted that The Joker would be able to move anytime soon.  
He was currently sprawled out across the bed his pin-striped trousers rising up revealing colourful mismatched stripy socks that looked absolutely ridiculous.  
His eyes were closed and his hair had stuck to his forehead with smudged makeup and sweat.

He had a sense of vulnerability that Rachel had not seen and she doubted that anybody had seen for a long time. The Joker didn't seem like the kind of person to reveal that side of him to anybody, and he'd normally be alone during times like this so there was never anybody there to witness it.

But here she was, Rachel Dawes, lying on the same Bed as the Joker, her with her slashed stomach and face, bandaged up and unable to move without the feeling of her guts being ripped out through tiny holes and then there was The Joker, Gotham's most wanted, and hated, the evil-doer who had killed people daily over the past weeks and now he was laying next to her stricken with fever and trembling.

This was a dream...

It had to be.

He looked... young. Rachel always guessed that The Joker was not that old as he always had an air of youth to him but never had he looked quite as young to her as he did at this moment.  
His makeup was faint and smeared and despite the fierce and frightening look that the scar's gave him he still looked young...younger than Rachel ever would have guessed.  
There was hardly a wrinkle marring his pale face.  
The Joker always asked people if his scars made them nervous or scared, her included but as she looked at his face now she realised his face was perfect, even with the scars, it was the type of perfection that was distorted and damaged and that was something...beautiful. It was a shame that he had to go ruin it with his psychotic mass murdering personality.

"Staring is rude" he muttered his eyes still closed.

"What's your date of birth?" Rachel blurted out, she hadn't planned on asking but it was something she was curious about, he looked so young looking at him now and she never really thought about how old The Joker actually was.

The Joker's eyes fluttered open and he frowned before turning to look at her, his cracked red lips smirking.  
"Why... you want to know my star sign... _oh Rachel..._ shouldn't you buy me a drink first?" he giggled.

Rachel rolled her eyes before smirking as she passed the nearly empty bottle of Jack Daniels into The Joker's hands.  
The Joker nodded taking a large mouthful "This'll do".

"I want to know how old you are" Rachel asked her voice taking a serious turn.  
The Joker's eye brows rose, so high in fact that they could have disappeared into his receding hairline.

"Out of all the questions you could ask me Pumpkin...you want to know my _age... _don't you know its rude to ask a person's age!" he said feigning slight hurt.

Rachel scoffed "That only applies to women".

"You and your feminist causes... sexism against females is bad but you Sweat Pea are just as bad as men... in fact worse... everyone knows that men are _highly_ sensitive creatures when it comes to age care and wrinkle reduction" he said his face a picture of perfect seriousness.

Rachel's lips twitched but she forced her face into a stony expression. The Joker's cold eyes were laughing at her struggle.

"You can't be that old... but you're older than me..."

"How old are _you _Rachel?" The Joker said obviously bored closing his eyes again and sinking further into the soft caverns of Rachel's bed.  
"Twenty seven..." she said without missing a beat.

"Well... tick tock tick tock... the big 3...0 is only a few years away...I thought women were supposed to be...sensitive about their age"

"I don't have any reason to be sensitive over it...I'm 27 and happy to be where I am in my life at this age, I'm not dreading turning 30... or getting older..I'm perfectly happy with where my life is going".

The Joker turned to look at her his lips quirking into an accusing sneer "You...Miss Dawes... are a liar..."

Rachel's eyebrows furrowed together "No... I'm not"  
"Yes... you are".

"NO... I'm _not"_

The Joker giggled and when Rachel felt the soft vibrations against her shoulders she realised that The Joker had scooted closer to her so they were shoulder to shoulder.

"You are not happy with where your life is going... you're _bored... _but you cover it up with all those pretty little smiles of yours and you go to all those...proper functions like that ...lovely fundraiser you attended with dear Misterr...Dent. But the truth is Beautiful... You're just slipping through life... Looking and behaving the way you should because that's what's normal... But we both know... you're not normal are you... no... You're a _freak_...like...me".

Rachel's heart leapt into her throat, and she felt her body begin to tremble as his words sunk into her head. Did his words ring true in some ways? Was she simply careening through her life with false smiles and happiness trying to cover up her boredom from the world and herself because that was what was expected and normal?  
Was she truly just like The Joker underneath? A chaos loving freak?,  
No... No she was not like him.  
She didn't kill people for a joke!  
She wasn't a sick monster.

"I'm not a freak... I'm nothing like you... "Rachel let out a disgusted laugh "... you KILL people and you don't have any remorse over it... you think it's funny... you are disgusting.. Just an evil disgusting...thing" Rachel bit out through gritted teeth, she didn't know where it came from but suddenly she felt tears pool at her eyes.  
She didn't know why, it wasn't as if she hadn't thought about saying that to his face for a long time.  
But the emotion was overwhelming and hurtful.

The Joker's smile only faltered for a single second before he burst out in hysterical laughter, his eyes were squeezed shut as he gave great woops of laughter.  
Suddenly his hands were on her cheeks pulling her towards him  
"You!... you are good... you should really think about going pro... I tell ya stand up is your thing for sure.. No more of this lawyer thing, why send people to prison when you can make them laugh!".

Rachel tried to squirm away from The Joker's grip on her cheeks but despite his obvious illness he was stronger than her.  
"I'm not joking you bastard... _let me go"._

The Joker only held on tighter, his fingers almost digging into the skin of her cheeks.  
Rachel felt sharp stabs of pain as he squeezed her wounded cheek and couldn't help a small whimper escape.

"I know you weren't joking Freaky but just the way you get all red when you get angry is just the...cutest thing... You almost had steam coming out of your ears... ahh priceless".

"Freaky... another new nickname Joker?... I'm not a Freak" Rachel said in anger.

The Joker leaned forward closer, and Rachel was slightly mesmerized by how different he looked without the thick-laced white paint coating his face, did he even realise that his makeup had washed away?

"This coming from the women who was _moaning _as she was being sliced...open with a knife...but no you're not a freak... I wonder what Harvey would have to say about that if he knew... hmm... would he open his arms wide full of...true love for his little...Tainted masochistic fiancé... congratulations by the way I heard about the news... don't suppose I'm going to be getting an invite to the wedding... I could give Husband a few pointers for the honeymoon... You know better bring some rope and knives along... just to spice things up".

Rachel grimaced "You're disgusting..." she whispered.

The Joker ran his fingers down her bandaged cheeks putting pressure on it with the pads of his fingers.  
Rachel yelped as his fingers pushed on a particularly painful area.  
Suddenly one of his hands were gone from her cheek, but his eyes never left hers as he reached over her for something on the dressing table next to her bed.

Suddenly The Joker had moved their positions on the bed slightly so they were sitting up and she was in front of him slightly.  
Rachel was then staring at her own reflection.  
The Joker had gotten the large mirror that she had left on her table and held it up to both of their faces.  
The Joker smirked, leaning his head on her shoulder. Rachel could feel his hair tickle her cheek and she fought the urge to lean into the feeling of his cheek against hers..

"And now... so are you" he giggled.

Rachel felt the tears that had pooled at her eyes trail down her pale and sunken cheeks.  
She knew this was just The Joker playing with her head but as she saw them both reflected into the glass it made her heart ache.

Her face looked different, almost like a stranger was staring back at her through the glass.  
She didn't know this person... this was not Rachel Dawes... or was it?  
Maybe it was... Maybe The Joker was right maybe her reflection had been hiding inside her entire life and now with his coaxing it was being set free.  
The Joker had reached into her and yanked her out, leaving the smart and sophisticated... _boring? _ Rachel Dawes lost and confused.

The Joker turned into her and pressed his lips to her wounded cheek, Rachel couldn't tear her eyes away from the unnerving picture.  
She saw Rachel Dawes...somewhere in that picture she was sure she hadn't changed in terms of looks besides the sallow complexion; sunken eyes and bandage but she could see something else among the familiar planes of her face.  
Someone was being created, or bought out from within... bought out by The Joker.  
This was _his _fault ... trying to mess with her head, mess with her views... and ultimately mess with her heart.  
Why was he doing t his to her? Did he think he could try and change her..? Was it working?

Was she turning into someone that she would hate?

"What's the matter...? Don't like what you see?" The Joker asked "...I know the feeling" he muttered.

Rachel couldn't even open her mouth or find the words to answer him, instead she stayed silent, her lips trembling as she silently cried.  
The Joker licked away her fallen tears, his face gently rested on hers and Rachel could feel his scars rise in a grin before she saw it in the mirror; she was too busy looking at herself to really look at him.

His hands rested at the nape of her neck and then without warning he wrapped his entire arm around her throat cutting of her air.  
This would have normally sent Rachel into a panic...in any other circumstance.  
But she didn't fight at all; she simply sat there against The Joker's body as he gripped her air pipe.  
Was this what she was now?

_Disgusting... look at yourself.. You make me sick... you're disgusting...do you like being punished? You deserve you it... You cheating whore!  
_Rachel didn't know where the fierce voice was coming from but as she stared at herself in the mirror it was all she could hear in her head that and the distant echoes of laughter that she knew belonged to only one man.

Through her lack of air Rachel managed to whisper, her voice filled with pain  
"Why are you doing this to me..."

"Because it's fun" The Joker whispered into her ear.

_I hate you.. i hate you .. I do... I do hate you I do hate you... I DO. _

"Who need's love when you have blind hatred..." The Joker growled

Did Rachel say 'i hate you' out loud? She couldn't remember she didn't really care.  
All she cared about was that her reflection was scaring her and that she didn't care that The Joker had his hand around her throat and she didn't care that The Joker's hands were currently fondling her breasts... wait what?

Rachel gasped as The Joker's hands brushed at her chest sending razor sharp tingles over her body.  
She didn't have the strength anymore to fight him off, and she didn't have the strength mentally to turn around and face him, but when she looked in the mirror she could handle it.  
It was surreal, in the mirror she could pretend that it was somehow not happening.  
That she was still asleep.

Then The Joker was gone, the mirror returned to her bedside table, and The Joker had returned to his lying position on the bed next to her, his eyes beginning to drift close with sleep.  
Rachel stared at him unable to catch her breath, it coming out in harsh shallow pants.

Rachel couldn't find the strength to stay in the position she was in any longer and scooted further down on the bed so she was laying down also.  
It was difficult, every time she moved, sharp stabbing pains erupted from her stomach.

Finally she had managed to find herself comfortable, as comfortable as she could be with The Joker laying a simple breath away.  
If she wanted to, or if she so dared she could simply reach out her hand and touch him, or grasp his hand in hers.  
If she wanted to...which she didn't of course.

Rachel stared up at the ceiling, listening to the Joker breathe next to her, trying to wonder what it would be like if she woke up and realised that this all had been a dream... or maybe wake up and realise that the entire few weeks had actually been figments of her imagination.

Would she go back to living life the way she was, juggling between her love for Harvey and Bruce as well as both of their love for her, the pressures of marriage that Harvey always threw at her.  
The boring simple life that she had gotten herself into, now that she knew there could be so much more, that there was so much more to live for.  
Could she go back to being who she was?

Somehow she really doubted it.  
The Joker had changed things... and there was no going back.

Rachel tried to ignore the strangeness that had put her in the situation she was currently in.  
Lying next to her was The Joker, her abductor, Gotham's villain, the dark enemy.  
Here they were lying together on her bed, sick.  
Who would of thought?  
Rachel nearly laughed out loud at how unbelievable it sounded even to her own ears.

Rachel took a chance and peered to her side, The Joker's face was turned towards her but his eyes were closed and his breathing was steady. She couldn't be sure if he was asleep or not. But he sure looked a lot healthier than he did when he collapsed in her doorway. She guessed the fever had probably died down a bit.

She had the urge to reach out and brush the stray strand of hair plastered to his forehead but stopped herself, she had to learn self-control.  
If it was possible to both feel comfortable and uncomfortable at the same time, that is how Rachel felt at that moment.  
But she didn't want it to end, if the day which was rapidly turning into night could stay like that for ever, if she could just lay there and watch him asleep or with his eyes closed whatever it was, maybe she could analyse him, delve deep into his psych.  
Figure him out.

_What kind of monster is he _

Just as she thought that she wouldn't be able to control her wondering hands any longer a banging sound came from her door.  
The Joker's eyes flung open but he didn't move a muscle, obviously not caring who it was that disturbed him.  
Rachel didn't move, what did she do? Whoever it was would find out that she currently had The Joker in her home!  
There was another knock.  
But Rachel still didn't move.  
"I think someone is here to see you" The Joker said from his position on her bed.

"Rachel?!" a voice yelled through her apartment door.  
And Rachel's heart stopped.

She knew that voice... she knew that voice extremely well.

"Rachel...are you there?" The voice asked again knocking the door heavily with fists.  
Rachel cleared her throat making eye contact with The Joker who only smirked at her not bothered at all that Harvey Dent was standing just outside the door.

"W...who is it?" She yelled back despite the fact that she knew exactly who it was.

"Its Harvey...are you going to let me in or am I going to stand out here all day?" He said laughing a little.

Rachel swallowed trying to steady her quivering voice; it would give to much a way.  
"H-hang on, i-i'll be right there".

"Oh my god" Rachel whispered looking around her room desperately for a solution that didn't exist.  
The Joker did nothing but giggle.

"Shut up!" Rachel growled at him punching him with her fist "This isn 't funny... unless you want Harvey to see you here in which he'd then call the police and you'd be in prison ...again.. Shut up and ...hide or something "

"I find it best not to worry about things...simply let whatever will happen... happen"

"Rachel?!... What's taking you so long... I have information... About The Joker" Harvey said his voice muffled from the door.

Rachel stopped dead and it seemed The Joker tensed as well.

"Well this is getting interesting" The Joker said his eyes never leaving Rachel's.  
Rachel swallowed hard trying to find her voice "O...Okay..."

"Are you okay Rach... you sound a bit..." Harvey said his worry evident in his tone.  
Rachel would have normally found it nice that Harvey could tell something was wrong just be the tone of her voice but at that moment her attention was completely focused on the grinning man in front of her still lying on her bed lazily.

She was stuck in the middle, half of her heart was calling out to her in the distance and half of her was pulling her forward and making her want to bury herself inside him.

One half of her was the Rachel Dawes she knew, the other part was the new monster inside of her that had been lying dormant for so long...

And she was being awoken.

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_dude i know its not the best  
I still think its alright :) so woo hoo for me xD  
as long as you folks like it .. thats good enough for me.  
WOOOOOO  
So.. The Joker... looks in the mirror and gets totally freaked out by the reappearance of Jack... blames Rachel.  
Rachel looks in the mirror see's a stranger, a freak just like the The Joker... blames the Joker.  
If thats not love i don't know what is -Sighs-  
hehe _

review people  
those who do own my heart.


	26. Chapter 26 Story

_hi folks  
Here we are again for more.. fun Jokachel time..  
Well ... there isn't really any Jokachel in this chapter at all... well there is if you look but mostly...you know what i'll just let you read it yourselves heheh  
thanks for the reviews my darlings readers_

Disclaimer : i do not own them.  
obviously... 

**teachmesweetheart - **heh 10 things i hate about you, i really love that movie but i wasn't actually intentionally putting that quote in. of course i realised after i had written it out and was like hahe oh well it fits xD

**Ink and Parchment **- after reading over that chapter i too noticed similarities with your fanfic ( Which i LOVE by the way ) but i can honestly say it was completely unintentional. a lot of this fic i simply improvise and make up as i go along, of course some of the most pivotal and important parts of the plot i planned out a long time ago and for the last few chapters as well as the next few chapters I planned out a while ago... also researching a lot about Stockholm Syndrome and following how it works and symptoms and stuff always helps with how the characters are going and the thoughts and feelings that they are having and all that crap.  
SO yes it was a mistake... im glad you arn't angry over it because that would of made me feel really bad... hehe.  
thanks for the reviews!  
also look forward to more chapters of your story!

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**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME **

Chapter twenty six - Story

Rachel heard the knock on her door again but it seemed her body refused to move.  
The knocking continued and the seconds ticked by and yet neither The Joker nor Rachel made a move.  
Rachel could not look away from him and The Joker didn't look like he had any plans to look away from her.

"Rachel!" Harvey yelled through the door, his voice was frantic now, his worry clearly starting to escalate.

"Aren't you going to get that?" The Joker said leaning his head back on the pillow.

Rachel narrowed her eyes at him "Harvey comes in and see's you in my home what do you think he's going to do, have a nice conversation...over a JD and coke?!"

Suddenly The Joker's relaxed look broke out in excitement "Oh so you're worried about me!, that is just too adorable, don't worry though... I think I can take care of myself".

Rachel groaned before turning to exit her room, she couldn't keep Harvey waiting anymore, she just hoped to god that The Joker stayed in her bedroom and Harvey didn't go in that part of her apartment.

Standing in front of the door she took a deep breath trying to calm her nerves, she didn't know why exactly she was so nervous, she guessed it was the murderer she was hiding in her bedroom.  
Would he be able to tell something was wrong? Rachel thought as her hand grasped the door knob.

Holding her breath, Rachel opened the door.  
There he was, Harvey Dent in all his glory, though slightly more worn than usual.

Like everyone in Gotham, the Joker's antics had taken its toll on him and he was looking a little worse for wear.

But she supposed it was nothing to how she looked judging by her fiancés face.  
"Rachel... my god... you look..." he whispered.

He lifted his fingers to her cheeks; her cheeks were pale and stained with dried tears.  
Rachel forced a small smile "Terrible I know... No need to rub it in".

Harvey shook his head instantly "No...No that's not what I meant... Well okay that is kind of what I meant" he said laughing nervously.

This made Rachel laugh slightly, and warmth spread through her, familiar warmth that Rachel had not felt in a while. How she missed that sense of normalcy.  
Some part of Rachel wished that she could just send Harvey away, if she did there was no chance that he would find out about The Joker.  
But she couldn't, he would still suspect something if she sent him away.  
"Um... would you like to come in... you said you had information about The Joker" she said.

Rachel would be lying if she said she wasn't curious as to what information Harvey and the police had discovered about the clown prince of crime.  
After everything that had happened in Gotham they still knew nothing about this man, and after everything she personally had been through with him, she also hadn't a clue about who he really was or where he came from or his background.  
That was what was frustrating to her the most, the fact that he seemed to know everything about her and yet she knew absolutely nothing about him. She knew that he was a chaos addict, that he was deeply disturbed in many ways and that at some points in time she could stare into his eyes and lose herself.  
He made everything burn...

That was as much as she knew about him, she wanted to know more and Rachel definitely knew that The Joker would never tell her a thing.

Harvey took a step in nodding like he had made this fantastic discovery; "Yeah a lot more than I anticipated, it's what i was doing last night, sorry I didn't call it's just everyone was so busy..."

Rachel nodded "Its alright"... _no its not_ "I completely understand" He_ could of called me. _

Harvey took a seat on her sofa and Rachel swallowed hard, if he only knew what had occurred on that sofa.  
Rachel sat down next to him but she could have sworn she heard a giggle from behind her.  
Turning her head she saw a familiar blood red grin flash behind the crack in the door to her bedroom.  
He was laughing at her...

He knew what went on, on the couch, knew why she was suddenly so much more uncomfortable.  
How could she ever be truly comfortable around Harvey again? After everything she'd done how could she look at him.

Rachel's eyes stayed glued to the floor. Hoping that Harvey would not notice her inability to make eye contact with him.  
Then suddenly his hand was on her cheek, gently caressing her, His fingers were warm and comforting. Everything about this man was so inviting.  
Rachel couldn't help but lean into his touch desperate to feel that simple and pure love. Theirs was the easy love.

"You're so pale" Harvey said running his fingers over her cheek  
Rachel squeezed her eyes shut, trying to keep the tears from falling but it seemed nothing was strong enough to keep the tears in.

"Hey... shh.. Everything is going to be okay" Harvey said wiping her tears away with his thumbs and kissing her lips softly.  
"We'll catch him... "He whispered against her lips.  
Rachel pulled back turning away from him awkwardly. The words making her insides twist uncontrollably. They always said that about the bad guys didn't they, didn't mean it was true.

Did she want it to be true? Rachel would of felt sickened by the thought a short time ago but it was slowly becoming habit that she'd feel that way about the man in her bedroom.  
Some small part of her wanted him in her life.  
Yet it was killing her to be with him.

Rachel took a deep breath turning towards Harvey and forcing the most convincing smile on her face and nodded.

"So... what did you find out... about The Joker I mean" Rachel said trying to bring up the subject again without being too forward.

"Well as it turned out... the place you were in when The Joker took you captive, wasn't his" Harvey said.

Rachel couldn't help the little giggle that escaped but was cut-off when she noticed Harvey's slightly confused expression.  
Clearing her throat Rachel continued "I... didn't think it was... I always kind of got the feeling that he was squatting there."

Harvey nodded "Something like that...a bit over 20 years ago a family lived there... a young couple, moved to Gotham to raise their child... a little boy".

Every muscle in Rachel's body tensed, she tried focusing on Harvey but her mind was somewhere else...  
a little boy... Rachel's eyes flickered to her bedroom, the door still open a crack... he was listening.

Rachel nodded urging Harvey to continue his story, yet some part of her deep down already knew the outcome to this story.

"Their names were John and Christine Napier, and their son... Jack."

Rachel eyes snapped up to Harvey and something inside her clicked. Jack? The dreams... the card.  
Rachel tried to keep her breathing even but it was beginning to get out of control.

"_Jack.._." she choked out, trying desperately to sound as normal as possible, it was not working.

Harvey nodded again "Not much else is really known about them, they lived in Gotham for quite a number of years, I know Christine Napier was a teacher and John Napier worked for a number of different businesses in Gotham".

Rachel pressed forward "And...Jack?"

"The kid... nothing on him at all, just the average boy I suppose."

The silence that followed was killing her and despite the fact that there was no sound, if she focused she thought she could hear sounds from her bedroom.  
"So what happened?"

"... and then...there was a phone call to the police from a neighbour...a disturbance, The police went in thinking it was a simple domestic disturbance... but" Harvey trailed off, his eyes turned misty and Rachel could tell what ever happened, whatever the police saw when they got there was horrible.

"What...?" Rachel asked, she was practically on the edge of her seat.

"John and Christine Napier were dead... They say it was a blood bath... throats slit, she was beaten and raped... he was stabbed numerous times... And they both had their faces cut up... from the mouth upwards into a smile... sound familiar?"

Rachel nodded "And ... The little boy?" Rachel asked

"Well by this time he wasn't really little anymore... he was about 16...he was Gone... he just disappeared there's no record of Jack Napier after that"

Rachel nodded "So.. you think The Joker killed them... John and Christine Napier" Rachel knew it was ridiculous The Joker would of only of been a kid himself at that time, but she wanted to hear it from Harvey. She wanted to know if her theory was correct. She _needed _to know.

Harvey shook his head "No... The Joker _was _the boy... Jack Napier. That photograph that you found Rachel has been there since the Napier's lived there... The Joker probably didn't even know it was there. So we ran it through our systems and had forensics get on it and so there we have it... The Joker has an identity".

Rachel's mouth dropped open she could even think... or breathe, she felt numb all over.

"B-but there has to be more to the story than that... "She whispered.  
Harvey nodded "There always is isn't there".

Rachel felt the burning emotion rip through her before she felt the tears drip from her eye lashes and onto her cheeks.  
Her eyes went to the bedroom door again, the crack was still there.  
She stared at it, stared at the man behind the crack, the tears didn't stop. She felt an aching sensation in her chest that felt remarkably like how she imagined a broken heart would feel like.  
Jack Napier... she found him.

Through all the sympathy and emotion that Rachel was suddenly over whelmed with she forgot that Harvey was even sitting there. That was until he brushed her hair behind her ear.

"You keep staring at your room... Why?" he asked his eyebrows furrowing together in worry and that tell-tale hint of suspicion.  
Rachel's heart stopped.  
It was the question she'd been dreading, this was her own fault, if she just stopped herself from looking in that direction every two seconds he wouldn't of realised anything.

Rachel bit her lip and yawned "I'm just...tired... long day you know... and this medication".  
She lied again, and it shocked her at how easy it came.  
She always hated lying, ever since she was a little girl and she always got caught out in her lie, Bruce always said it was because her eyes gave it away.  
But not now... lying was so easy now. It was all she did.

"Oh, well you should get some sleep... I'm going to go now, got a lot of work to do with this Joker thing... I can't wait till we get him in the padded cell where he belongs..."

Rachel nodded giving a stiff smile, she agreed, he was a sick person, he really did need to be locked away before he hurt anyone else, but the selfish part of her couldn't handle the thought of him being taken away, she needed to learn more, she wanted to play more of their game.

Harvey was silent looking deep into her eyes, it was as if he was looking for something in them, he was waiting for a reaction, for her to tell him not to go. For her to tell him that she needed him.  
'Oh Harvey... I do need you... 'Rachel thought.

"You know what... I can stay here if you want.. if you don't want to be alone".  
Rachel nearly grinned; this was her Harvey... not subtle at all.  
"No thankyou... Knight... you go be a hero"

Harvey smiled softly before kissing her again, careful of her bandaged cheek.

Harvey was out of the door in a matter of seconds and Rachel let out a breath in a gush.  
Grasping her chest with her hand she doubled over feeling her stomach do somersaults and her head go cloudy.  
It was too much information at once.  
Slowly as if waiting for him to jump out with a knife she lifted her eyes to the door, it remained the same as it did all throughout the conversation with Harvey.  
The door opened just a crack.  
She knew The Joker had listened to the entire thing, and now he knew she knew about him.

What did she say to him now... Everything was so jumbled. All this time Rachel longed to know about The Joker's past, but hearing only a small part of the horrible circumstance that caused Jack Napier to fade away was so too much, too horrifying.

She knew after hearing this story, she'd never look at The Joker in the same way again.

* * *

_eeek so now we know a little bit about what happened to young Jack Napier. :( kinda sad poor thing. _


	27. Chapter 27 Goodbyes

_oh man oh man oh man i'm so so so sorry to those people who've been waiting for such a long long time for this long awaited chapter 27 of my little masterpiece.  
Many reasons  
last week of term 3 of school last week including lots of assignments and year 11 drama performance which i was in xD  
which we totally rocked by the way!_

then there was this week of holidays which including lots of confusion and writers block... eeeek ( how i hate that!) and me kind of living at my mates place for a few days.

so hopefully with the writers block dwindling i'll get my writing mojo back and continue with the story.  
I hope you like it... it took me a very very very long time to do.  
Many many hours 

even then its not that great eeeeeeek

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter twenty seven- Goodbyes

Rachel took a deep breath finally gathering the strength and courage to get up from her position on the couch.  
She expected The Joker to come out of the room but he still remained inside her bedroom, as if he was waiting for her to come to him.

She took small steps towards her door and it seemed the entire apartment disappeared around her, the only thing she could see was the door in front of her, and the possible sight that she would see once she stepped through it.  
Some small part of Rachel thought that this was it then; now that she knew something about The Joker's past he'd finally kill her.

Rachel swallowed her fear, no he wouldn't now, if he wanted to kill her he'd of done it already, he also said that she was an addiction for him now.  
First rule of addiction, don't cut off your supply.

Rachel reached the door and she felt her heart beat rapidly inside her chest, opening the door she waited for the inevitable jump she would receive when The Joker jumped out and scared her.  
But nothing happened, the room was still and silent and there wasn't a thing out of place.  
Everything looked exactly the way she left it, including the man laying on her bed.

The Joker was still there on the bed, laying down with his eyes closed as if he was in a deep sleep.

Rachel blinked in confusion; he looked as if he hadn't moved at all, only he was lying in a different position now like he'd moved in his sleep.  
Had he heard at all? Or had he simply drifted off to sleep as soon as she left the room?

No, he'd heard, she knew it. There was that feeling she got while she listened to Harvey tell her the story, that feeling that she was being watched. She could feel his eyes burn into her from the crack in her door frame not to mention she saw flashes of red black and white, unmistakable.

His breathing was soft and his facial expression was blank, it was odd to see him so expressionless.  
And Rachel felt a little tug in the pit of her stomach, wishing to see his face alive once again.

Taking a step forward she sat down on the edge of the bed so she could be closer to him.  
She didn't know what to do, if he was asleep... did she wake him up and risk getting hurt again... or did she just leave him be?  
If he wasn't asleep... what the hell did she do then?

Rachel's eyes travelled over the planes of his face, now distorted. She felt sorry for him; she couldn't imagine how it would feel to have your parents murdered so brutally... she really did feel heartache for him. Or was the sympathy she felt for the boy? The one hidden inside the Joker, after all it was the hidden boy that lost his parents.  
But no matter which way you put it, what he was now was wrong. He was screwed up... and what he was doing now, to Gotham and to its people was sick.  
He needed to be sent away.

She could call Harvey right now and tell him she had the Joker. She could call the police, she could call Bruce and let Batman deal with him and yet she knew she wouldn't.

And some small part of her simply couldn't.

Rachel reached out a hand to his expressionless face, gently running her fingers over his cheeks.  
She ran her fingers across his jaw bones coming to rest on his scars.

Before Rachel could even feel the bumpy laceration under her fingers the Joker had jumped up slamming her into the headboard of the bed.  
His hand was crushing her air pipe and his knife was placed against the healing wound on her neck, the knife dug into it.

"Gotcha!" he growled pressing his fingers deeper into her neck.

Rachel groaned trying to pry The Joker's hands from her throat,

"I knew you weren't asleep" she whispered "you heard then"

The Joker's face changed slightly, not enough to be really noticeable. But Rachel saw the slight shift in his eyes.  
"Oh you mean Harvey's little bedtime story... What a _riveting_ tale"

Rachel scoffed, or at least she tried to through the pressure of his hand as well as the sharp pang as he pressed the knife into her neck.

"Horrifying is more the word I was looking for" Rachel whispered her chest wheezing because of the oxygen deprivation, small tingles of numbness radiated from her fingertips.

The Joker licked his lips, nodding as he leant towards her.  
Rachel felt his warm breath on her face; she hadn't been this close to him since that night on the sofa.  
He still smelt the same, the odd putrid smell that could still somehow attract her.

But this time his face was different, last time if she didn't count that moment of seriousness, he was laughing at her, his face wide with amusement.  
This time his face was somehow different.

Half of his face was upturned in a smirk but it was forced.  
Pained.. Rachel realised. His face was pained and he was hiding it. He was hiding it very well.  
But now that she realised what it was, she could pin-point the pain that crossed his features.

It was so hidden, like he always kept it buried deep down and never let it rise to the surface.  
He would never let anyone see a moment of pain; that was a moment of weakness.  
But she could see it.

The Joker's mouth opened to say something but he stopped, his expression suddenly turning into a mixture of emotions.

Of what Rachel could see there was amusement, anger, frustration and on some level hate.  
"Oh I see... after ..._Hearing _that wonderful little story... you feel sorry for me now don't you... well Miss Dawes.. I'm a little disappointed"

The Joker shook his head, his face was dead serious but Rachel could see the obvious sarcasm in his eyes.  
He was playing with her, she knew it. But despite the game she knew he was playing there was that slight twinge inside that Rachel could feel in the air. One wrong word, one wrong move and this would end badly.  
The tension in the room was thick enough to cut with a knife.

"No..." Rachel ground out through gritted teeth.

The Joker's eyes widened and he laughed, his laughter laced with bitterness.  
"No... NO!... you _don't _ feel sorry for little old me?... you don't have the... warm fuzzy feeling of pity inside your heart for me now?..."

Rachel shook her head.

The Joker's eyes narrowed and the colour of his eyes once again turned black, the haunting murderous gaze burning a hole through her.  
Rachel felt her body tremble with fear as he leant forward again his nose brushing her cheek.

She whimpered turning her head away from his eyes, she couldn't look at them.  
How quickly things had changed in such a short time, not long ago she was feeling abnormally comfortable in The Joker's presence and now she was slightly petrified of even opening her mouth in case she said something that would end with her on the pointy end of his knife.

"Then...tell me... _why _do_..._You have that look on your... pretty little face hmm" he growled out his teeth running over the skin of her bandaged cheek making her cry out.

"I...I don't... "She stammered

She felt The Joker nod "Oh... But you do... you do... It's written all over your face... Miss Dawes... you're covered in it. Pity... is really not a good look on you pumpkin"

Rachel took a shuddering breath trying to steady her racing heart.  
Some part of her brain told her to just shut up, telling her not to open her mouth; he was just waiting for her to say something that he could laugh at or kill her for.  
Which on some level confused her, this was The Joker... he didn't need an excuse to kill anybody he simply did it because he wanted to... so why did it seem like he was hesitating?... why did it seem like he was waiting for a reason to kill her, why not just do it.

'Because he can't...' she realised.

It was this thought that gave Rachel the strength to get the next words out, despite her overwhelming sense of dread.

She faced him, and their eyes met, electricity running through them both.

"I don't feel sorry for you... I feel sorry for _him_..." Rachel whispered, watching many different things flicker over The Joker's face, all disappearing too quickly for Rachel to define them "For... Jack".

There was only a moment of silence before the room was filled with both of their loud yells.  
The Joker grabbed a fist full of her hair slamming her head hard against the headboard of the bed.  
Rachel yelled out, feeling the wooden headboard split and crack because of the force, small splinters of wood embedding themselves in the new wound on the back of her head.

The Joker straddled her, his fist still roughly pulling on her head, forcing it back against the wood.  
His face was lit with fury and yet his mouth was open, laughter spilling out mixed with her yells of pain.

The Pain in her head was horrible, Rachel knew she was in for one massive headache but it was nothing compared to the pain she felt on her re-stitched stomach wounds.  
Rachel let a blood curdling scream rip from her throat as The Joker's other hand pressed down on her wounds.  
Her screams only made his laughter louder.

Rachel tried squirming away from his crushing weight, but it only seemed to make him push his weight harder against her.

The Joker's laughter continued "Oh ha!... Jack's not here Raaachel.. JACK IS DEAD" he growled through his laughter.

But there was something different about his laughter Rachel noticed as his loud cackles echoed through her bedroom.  
This wasn't his normal laughter, there was something behind his laughter and Rachel could hear it in the way his voice broke with emotion.  
This laughter was pained.

He pulled her up using the hand that was fisted in her hair, Rachel whimpered as she was hauled up, her scalp protesting against the force.

He rested his forehead against hers, his body shaking with fever, anger and laughter.

"There's nobody in here anymore Rachel" He whispered.

Rachel felt a sob work its way up from her throat, there was no doubts that those words would remain with Rachel for the rest of her life.  
What she always suspected, there was nothing inside him. She always suspected that, yet her heart still broke all the same.  
Rachel yelled in agony as The Joker's fist connected with her jaw knocking her sideways off her bed.

"Oops" The Joker giggled grabbing her arms and lifting her up from the ground.  
Pulling her close The Joker ran his hands through her matted and slightly bloodied hair in a soothing manner, it only made Rachel squirm more.

"Shh Shh Shh... it's okay... you're okay... we're okay aren't we sweetheart?" he asked his voice lowering in a haunting whisper.

Rachel felt her lips tremble as she looked away from the Joker, unable to look at him any longer.  
"Come on... Rach... There's no need for the tears... no need to cry anymore...it will all be over soon"

Rachel's watering eyes met the Joker's for a second and that's all it took for every ounce of strength to leave her body.  
Encased in his arms, Rachel leaned forward pressing her lips to his.  
It was an act of impulse and fear, if this was how it was going to end, if she was going to die, then she wanted to do this one final time.

If she only had this one moment to live, she wanted to spend it feeling truly alive, she wanted to feel the burning again, the way everything about them matched in that demented and yet perfect way.

Rachel groaned leaning further into his warmth, her lips moving across his. Her legs buckled slightly when she felt him respond.

And there it was again, the inferno melting her insides and making every part of her body ache for more.  
If this was how she was going to die then Rachel could think of no perfect way.  
The Joker's fists clenched in her hair pulling her closer to him, Rachel felt a pull in her heart as she felt his body tremble slightly against hers and smiled against his mouth.

She felt as if she was whole for the first time in her life. For this one moment, she was whole and that empty place that she always felt was filled and it didn't matter who it was that filled the hole, but it was filled and locked in place.

He'd never leave her now.  
He was buried deep inside her now, wrapped around her heart, warming it.

How could she ever let this go now, how could she ever move on from the overwhelming feeling.  
Rachel felt her heart beat faster, that feeling she felt...It felt familiar and yet different.  
What was that feeling?

Rachel gasped, suddenly she stumbled backwards, her head smashing against the wall behind her.  
Her legs finally gave out and she slid to the floor.

Rachel looked up towards the man that pushed her away with the force of a semi-trailer.  
The Joker stood there only for a second in front of her, but the second felt like it was lasting a life time.

His face was expressionless yet filled with so many words.  
He was talking to her, silently and Rachel heard it so clearly.

Then he was gone.

Rachel heard her apartment door slam, so loudly she was sure The Joker could have knocked it off its hinges.  
Rachel squeezed her eyes shut to stop the tears that were about to fall but she couldn't stop them from rolling down her cheeks.  
Rachel sat there resting her head against the wall and silently cried.

The Joker was gone.  
Those silent words that she heard so clearly echoed in her mind.  
That would be that last time she'd see The Joker.

Oh, he was gone and he wasn't coming back. He was leaving Gotham. She guessed he wasn't the type of person to stay in one place for too long, but he was leaving and Rachel knew it was not for a change of scenery.  
He was leaving because of her and because of his past in Gotham, the past that he could no longer look at because if he stared at it for too long he'd start seeing things that he didn't want to. He'd start seeing ghosts that he'd buried; he'd start seeing Jack Napier.

Rachel took a shuddering breath through her tears, her heart wasn't splintered like she thought it would be, it wasn't ripped open or broken into a million pieces too small to mend.

It felt like he'd reached into her chest and ripped it out through her ribs.

But it would be okay... It had to be. Nobody would ever know about all that had happened.  
The Joker would leave, Gotham would be better again, Batman and Harvey would continue doing their work to make the world a better place and Rachel Dawes would smile and join in on the celebrations, eventually she'd heal from the experience.

It was for the best Rachel told herself it was what had to happen.

"Goodbye" Rachel whispered into the cold emptiness of her apartment, hoping that wherever The Joker was he'd heard it.

* * *

_so thats the end... _

HAHAHA I'M TOTALLY KIDDING  
no no no man its not the end... i mean i can't leave it like that can i !! that would be the easy way out.  
_so i hope you like it and i'll try and update soon... _


	28. Chapter 28 Friend

_oh my god oh my god_

_I am sooo soo soo sorry for those who have been waiting for weeks for this.  
Writers Block + school = not a lot of time or motivation. but here it is anyway and i think i am starting to get the mojo back :)  
Also .... _

_For those who read this story.. I have another Jokachel fic or... series of fics actually 'Vigilante'  
:) just in case you're wondering.... in other words... go check it out and review please xD _

_thanks  
_

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME**

Chapter twenty eight - Friend

Rachel shivered, the cold air coming from her window sending chills all over her body. She hadn't moved from her position on her floor.

She knew it was probably wise if she moved as her whole body was starting to cramp from sitting in the same position for so long. But she couldn't seem to find the will to get up.  
Her body was tired, and her mind was miles away.  
The shock of the day's events... the week's events was too overwhelming to ignore.

Her cheeks were swollen from the incessant amount of tears she had cried, her eyes were dry now, unable to find the strength to cry anymore.

Everything was so messed up; Rachel knew that everything that had happened was too weird to be real, bonding with The Joker?  
It felt like a dream that she couldn't wake from, only now she was being yanked out of the dream against her will.

A few weeks ago she would have longed for something to pull her from the nightmare that had become her life, now Rachel knew some part of her wished that she could return to the weird hazy mess that her life had become.

Thoughts were racing through her head, her body refusing to let her rest, why couldn't she just get some peace? Even when he was gone The Joker still managed to haunt her.  
Rachel groaned, every muscle in her body was clenched in tension, her head ached from where it was slammed into the wall, it was still bleeding she knew, she could feel the sticky wetness seep through her brown locks.  
Her face was sore, her bandaged cheek had been pulled and stretched, she could feel the bruising swell her puffy cheek even more.  
Her stomach was burning and not the burning she enjoyed, the pain was not underlined with that wonderful pleasure it had been before, now it was just painful.  
She didn't even want to know what she looked like.

Lifting her hand, Rachel bought it to the new wound on her head, it was deep, and her fingers came back red.  
Her eyes ran over the red fingers, intrigued with the deep colour of her blood, it was fascinating, this blood came from her own body, seeped from the crack in her skull, oozing out staining her hair and her wall red, how odd that she could see the blood on her hands, her own blood.

Taking a deep breath Rachel stood up, barely able to hold her weight. Her legs were shaking and she was sure that at any moment she would be sent tumbling back down to the floor, she didn't really mind.  
If she collapsed again she could just lay there for a while, try and forget everything and enjoy that sweet darkness that would encase her.

But no, she couldn't give up, she had to be strong now, Harvey, Bruce... everyone who she loved needed her.  
She needed help, she knew that for sure and though Rachel knew that she should go to the hospital, being inside a hospital room again was definitely not something that she wished for.  
There was only one person that she could think of to call.

Dialling the number, Rachel waited for someone to answer.

"_Hello..." _  
Rachel swallowed, but no voice would come out, her throat was raw and dry and she couldn't seem to make her vocal cords work.

"_Uh.... Hello... Who is this?" _ The voice asked again.

Rachel cleared her throat "Mara..." she said, her voice coming out in a wheezy croak.

"_Rachel... are you okay... you sound weird.. What's the matter?" _

"Yeah... it's me...... Could.... you come over... please" she all but whispered into the phone receiver.

"_Rachel.... what's wrong..... Seriously darling you sound horrible" _ the worry in Mara's voice was obvious, Rachel felt a slight twinge of warmth flood through her cold body, Mara cared... Mara wouldn't judge, Mara would be there for her, Mara would be her friend.  
She needed someone, she couldn't call Harvey, she definitely couldn't call Bruce, there was Alfred but she knew that it would be to weird seeing as he was like a father to her, she needed a friend something she was really lacking in her life, She hoped desperately that Mara Lewis would be that friend.

"I'm just........I'll explain it to you when you come over.... you have my address right"

"_Yeah... yeah course I do..... I'll be over in a bit yeah?" _

"Thanks" Rachel whispered hanging up.  
Rachel felt her body collapse onto her dining room chair. Her body was shaking and her head now pounding as if it was being drilled open with a jack-hammer.

It was painful physically yes, but her emotions were too difficult, something she didn't want to deal with, she'd cried everything she had out of her already. Now she just wanted to be numb..... Just for a little while.

A knocking sound echoed through Rachel's apartment, each loud bang echoing into her skull  
it wasn't that loud but to Rachel it felt like she was standing next to a speaker at a Marilyn Manson concert.

She had no doubt that The Joker's push had landed her a concussion, only her 10th for the week.... Rachel was surprised that she had any brain cells left after being knocked out so much over the last few weeks.

Mara's muffled voice broke Rachel out of her thoughts  
"Rachel... It's me... Mara... which you've probably guessed seeing as..... Uh....you talked to me like... 10 minutes ago... um aren't you going to let me in?"

A small smile tugged at Rachel's lips, it didn't matter how horrendous, how absolutely devastating things were, she was sure that Mara could make her feel a little better.

Rachel opened the door to be faced with Mara, a vast array of different emotions flickering across her face.  
Her green eyes were wide in shock and Rachel detected a definite hint of horror as Mara took in Rachel's haggard appearance.

"Blimey...... you look awful!" Mara gasped.

Rachel rolled her eyes "Thanks Mara...... really...you made my day".

Rachel gestured Mara too come in, before walking over to her sofa, her head starting to feel dizzy.

When exactly did her apartment start spinning around?

Mara took a seat next to Rachel on the sofa, her eyes instantly going to the bleeding wound on the back of her head.  
"What the hell happened.....? It looks like someone bashed you over the head with a crowbar...or cricket bat... or.....well, something large and hard!"

Rachel sighed "Something like that" she whispered.

Mara frowned at her, "I'm taking you to the hospital".

Rachel's eyes went wide "NO... I don't need to, it's why I called you, I Just can't fix it up myself... and you're a nurse so I guessed you'd be more qualified than me anyway".

Mara's face was covered with suspicion, Rachel knew it, Mara did not believe a word she said, and if she was honest with herself, in a way she was hoping that Mara would know that she was lying.... she'd lied too much already, she was sick and tired of it.

"Really....... because to me.... it seems like you don't want to go to the hospital because that would raise too many questions on how you acquired this new addition to your every growing list of injuries....questions that you don't want to answer" Mara said, her voice filled with more hysteria with every word.

Rachel bit her lip, it was true, and every word Mara said was true. If she went to the hospital they'd be suspicious about how she got another injury, they'd ask questions, Harvey would be called as well as Bruce and that would make it even more complicated, she didn't want them to know it was The Joker, she didn't want them to have another reason to go after him.  
She wanted him safe........ Which Rachel knew was something that he'd never be anyway.

Rachel's silence gave Mara the answer she was looking for and her eyes went even wider, if it was at all possible and her mouth hung open in awe.

"I'm right aren't I........? Oh my god that's exactly it..... It was him wasn't it Rachel....that clown...what's going on!"

Rachel groaned squeezing her eyes shut suddenly wondering if calling Mara had been the best idea after all. Maybe she could have somehow managed to take care of the wound by herself. It would have been better than being bombarded with hysteric al questions by loony Nurses.

Mara's voice softened, the shrill hysteria seeping away leaving warm calmness, it made Rachel want to tell her the truth, after everything, she wanted to tell the truth, to be honest, to finally let go of the secret that had been slowly crushing her for weeks.

"You can tell me".

Rachel took a deep breath, somehow preparing herself for the onslaught of questions that she would somehow have to give an answer to.

"Yes..." She whispered "Yes It was The Joker".

Mara gasped "I knew it... that freak's stalking you isn't he, what's he got... some kind of sick twisted clown crush on you or something?" she chuckled

Rachel looked at her in all seriousness "Yes...actually".

"Oh..." Mara said the smile fading from her face. "So ... how long has McFreaky been visiting you?

Rachel shook her head, taking a deep breath "Since he held me captive I guess."

"You haven't told anyone about his...... um _crush_"

Rachel scoffed, unable to hide the small Joker-like giggle that escaped her mouth "Are you kidding me? Of course I haven't... I mean what would I say oh by the way Harvey... The Joker likes to break into my house sometimes... you know just for a little chat and bonding time ... OH! And sometimes he gives me the wonderful gift of a concussion and a fucking knife in my face!"

Mara blinked a few times "Well.....It seems like a viable option".

"Why haven't you?"

Rachel paused as she took in Mara's words, she didn't know the answer to the question, and she didn't know why she didn't tell anyone that The Joker liked to break into her apartment..... She just knew that she wouldn't and couldn't.

"I... don't know" Rachel whispered honestly. "Oh... _god_ I really don't know"

Mara cleared her throat awkwardly, as if she was hesitant about what she was about to say  
"Do you like it when he ...... comes to you?"

Rachel turned away, unable to face Mara, she didn't want to see that disgusted look she knew would grace her pretty features when she realised the truth.

'Here goes nothing......say goodbye to your friend' Rachel thought to herself.

"Yes..." Rachel mumbled almost inaudible to Mara's ears.

There was nothing but silence in the room, and Rachel's shallow breathing. Tension filled the air and it was so thick that Rachel felt like she was drowning in it, unable to breathe and unable to escape it.

"Okay....." Mara said obviously shocked "I...didn't see that coming... I expected at least a little bit of denial".

Rachel scoffed "All I've done over the last few weeks is deny.....especially to myself".

Mara scooted closer to her and gently brushed a few stray hairs behind Rachel's ear.

"I want to say I get it... that I understand... but I don't... I'm sorry" Mara said her voice filled with regret.  
Rachel smiled, her dry eyes once again filling with tears.  
"I understand that you don't understand... how I can blame you.... _I_ don't even understand it" Rachel laughed, her laughter filled with bitterness.

Mara smiled, "So..... What is it.... that um...you like about.... h-him" she stuttered slightly.

Rachel frowned as she ran through all the reasons why she liked him, or why she wanted him. It didn't shock her when she couldn't find any.

"I don't even like him........ _Like_...how can anyone like him...? He's a disgusting hateful killer..._god _I hate him".

Mara nodded "I'm with you on that one".

Rachel sighed "But.... sometimes...... I see someone there in those eyes and for those small moments he's not The Joker... he's just a person" Rachel rolled her eyes, knowing how completely ridiculous she sounded even to her own ears

"I know it doesn't make sense.... But I honestly believe that there is someone inside, I used to think he was dead, but I've seen him.... Mara I've seen him, the man he keeps buried because he's afraid.... if he lets him out.... people will see him for what he really is... or was...... just a kid who watched his parents die".

Mara's eyes widened "...Wow..... You actually seem to know him Rachel".

Rachel shook her head, a sad smile on her face "Nobody knows him Mara".

"So... that's the reason why you like him... or don't like him?..... I'm confused" Mara said frowning.

"So am I.. I don't even know how I feel.... all I know is ... he makes me sick....and he makes me laugh.... he makes me cry... he makes me hurt, he makes me....._feel". _Rachel gasped through all the tears that were welling in her eyes.  
Her stomach was clenched in knots and everything ached in pain worse that anything she could have imagined.

Mara nodded "Harvey doesn't make you feel... ?"

Rachel sobbed "Harvey.... oh god... I always do this.... I forget about him... What kind of person does that make me Mara? I'm supposed to love him... I do love him! But he slips so far from my mind sometimes that I forget that even exists..... I'm horrible".

Mara wrapped an arm around her gently patting her back in what Rachel assumed was an act of comfort, Rachel was grateful, despite the fact that It did nothing to ease her horror.

"It's okay... Rachel you've been through a lot............ you have heard of Stockholm Syndrome right?"

Rachel narrowed her eyes "Stockholm Syndrome.... have I heard of it? .... It's all I've lived for weeks!"

Mara cringed before nodding "Right..... Sorry ".

Rachel sighed before shaking her head "No, I'm sorry, I'm just messed up.... it doesn't matter now anyway.... nothing matters now... he's gone"

Mara frowned "What?"

Rachel nodded "The Joker.... he's gone and he's not coming back".

Mara broke out into a large smile "Really... that's great... uh sorry... not so much from your point of view".

Rachel tried to smile, but the smile wouldn't come, her face muscles refused to work.  
"Yeah... it's great" she said her voice breaking.

"Do you love him?" Mara asked, her voice was completely serious, it shocked Rachel, very rarely did it seem that you heard Mara Lewis with such a serious tone in her voice.

Rachel took in her words, _do you love him.... Do you love him? _ _Do I love him? _ Rachel opened her mouth to say something but she couldn't find the words. Love... it was something that she had never even thought about in association with The Joker, there was no way after all.  
She couldn't love him, she didn't even like him.  
There was no way..........

"I....I ... he I don't... know" Rachel stuttered unable to truly form an actual sentence.

Mara smiled sympathetically before taking a closer look at the wound on the back of her head.  
"Okay... I'm going to clean this up... Where's your first aid kit".

"Bathroom" Rachel said absentmindedly, her mind was elsewhere.

Love.... Love....Love  
She Loved Harvey . She loved Bruce, she loved Alfred, she loved her family and friends, and they were all sure things that she loved without a doubt.  
The Joker, did she love him?  
She felt broken up inside every time she thought about The Joker and every time she thought about Jack.  
It seemed obvious that Rachel saw them as almost two different people.  
They almost were really.

The feeling inside her gut, every time she was near him, she couldn't describe it, she couldn't even describe anything about their relationship.

Mara came back in the room, with Rachel's first aid kit in her hand.

"Okay, let's do this" Mara said opening the box.

"Yes" Rachel whispered.

Mara looked up at her "What?"

"Yes I love him".


	29. Chapter 29 Twisted

_OOOKAy folks, here is how its hangin'._

heres the good news!!

Exams are over, and so is school so I will definitely be updated more frequently now, and it also seems I have a bit of my mojo back yay!

In the words of Alice Cooper... schools out for summer, so I now have about 6 or 7 weeks of hopefully somewhat frequent updates!

_woopeee because I really want to finish this story. _

_So here is chapter 29! _

_THANKS FOR THE READS AND REVIEWS GUYS!! _

_

* * *

_**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME **

Chapter twenty nine : Twisted

The Joker rolled his eyes as he heard the quiet mutterings of his goons. Did they really think that he was deaf and couldn't hear them chattering away in the front of the van about him?

"So why do you think he all of a sudden decided to skip town then?"

"How am I supposed to know? Who knows what goes on in that sick fuck's mind?"

The Joker couldn't help but let out a small chuckle at that comment, unpredictability, always made him feel so much better about himself.

"Maybe he got bored?"

"I don't know. I still think it's got something to do with that fine piece of ass, assistant DA, what's-her-name, the hostage girlie, _Rachel". _

The Joker sighed, his jaw clenching slightly, he was pissed off.  
He mostly pissed off because the minion was correct in saying that it was _that fine piece of ass_ as he so eloquently put it that was the main reason he had decided that Gotham had seen enough of his destruction, at least for the time being.

It wasn't just Rachel, but it was what _she _had caused, a severe chain reaction of events that The Joker just didn't fancy dealing with.  
First off, making him deal with aspects of his past that he didn't really feel like dealing with, it just wasn't something that he felt like doing, if he felt like.... a beautiful shoulder to cry on about watching his mommy and daddy gutted like fish, then he would but it just wasn't something that he felt like doing at that point in time, or ever for that matter.  
The Joker inwardly laughed at his sarcastic thoughts.

Not only that, but he could see that Rachel had developed quite an amount of odd '_feelings'_ for him, it was amusing to say the least but when it got to the point that she was literally throwing herself at him, ready to express her undying love to him, well that was the point where he got the hell out.

He liked her that was not a lie. He liked that she was so different compared to the other 'civilized' citizens of Gotham, a little fight in her. She was a feisty one his Rachel and he had become quite intrigued with messing around with her head just to see what her reaction was.

Only it seemed that as time had passed, the reactions he was starting to get from her, were not quite the ones that he was looking for, interesting still, but brought up a whole new range of problems that made The Joker confused, amused and also a feeling that one might akin to worry.

Worry, that perhaps, maybe getting involved and using Rachel Dawes to get to Harvey Dent and Batman was not the best completely un-planned plan he could of come up with.

The Joker huffed; no Rachel had caused more problems than rewards.  
The whole point of holding Rachel hostage was to lure Batman, piss him off, get under his thick batty skin, and crawl inside and see what exactly was hiding underneath.

Twist Harvey Dent around; make him tick by making Rachel tick.  
Then it all went wrong, the days, the weeks went by and it became less and less about The Batman and Harvey and more and more about what made Rachel Dawes tick? What could he do to get under her skin and make her crawl?  
What exactly did he have to do in order for Rachel to fall a little on the dark side, the bright white little angel.... with devil horns.

She, was all too willing, Pretty Rachel.... she tried to fight, but he really didn't need to do all that much for her to be quivering under his fingers, trembling just for that little bit more of him.  
Some part of him revelled in the fact that he could reduce her to a whimpering, begging mess. The other part of him felt sickened by her weakness, the stupid girl, why couldn't she just fight back?  
It would probably impress him more if she had just kicked him the balls and spat in his face rather than beg for a fucking.  
Of course if she did happen to beg for a juicy fuck, who was he to complain?

She became his addiction, blow up Gotham, play mind games with friendly folk and torture Rachel Dawes all in an average day.  
Things seemed to have become complicated extremely quickly.

Hearing Dent tell his story, seeing that Pity in Rachel's eyes, it made him fucking sick.

He was going to kill her, take his knife and slice her up real good, maybe even send a few pieces gift wrapped nicely in a pretty little box to her beloved Harvey for kicks, he was going to kill her and make sure it was _real _ slow. The Joker closed his eyes remembering the relief he felt when he realised that he was going to kill her, just to get rid of her.

To be rid of Rachel Dawes, oh what a feeling... unfortunately it seemed like maybe he had spent just a little too much time with her over the last few weeks because the annoying little bitch had seemed to of crawled her way inside him and he just didn't want to kill her, playing with her was way more fun.

"Oh yeah, she's a cutie that one, why would the boss even care?"

The goon laughed "Maybe underneath he's just like any other man, a sucker for a pretty face".

The Joker smirked "I guess that rules you out doesn't it....Chuckles".

The goons stopped, quickly muttering their apologies before returning to silence.

The Joker's smirk only widened.

**********************************************************************************************

Rachel hadn't moved from the couch, she was too tired, and it seemed that her limbs had decided not to work.  
Mara had done a pretty good job in fixing up the wound on her head and was now making them a much needed cup of tea.  
Rachel had never been a really big fan of tea, being a busy assistant DA she thrived off Caffeine and coffee had soon become her addiction, long before her addiction to The Joker.

But she was too tired to care, too worn down, and too numb to really care about what was going in her mouth.

She almost laughed, why did she say that? I love him... she repeated it in her head _I love him?? _  
She scoffed, "Are you serious?" she muttered under her breath.

Rachel didn't know why she said it; it was like it just burst from her mouth, straight from her brain without even fully realizing it.  
She used to have so much control, and now she didn't even have control over the words that came out of her mouth

Another wonderful parting gift from dearest Jack. Rachel felt her stomach clench in an unpleasant knot at the name that ran through her head, she honestly didn't know what it was she was feeling.  
If it just burst from her mouth perhaps it was true, why else would she say it.  
But she couldn't love him...  
The Joker of all people to love, how did she love him?  
Their relationship was like a plague; nothing good would ever come out of it, just sickness and pain and from the abrupt way that he had left, Rachel guessed that the sickness and pain was mutual.  
She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to rid herself of the thoughts, there was no use in thinking about it, she didn't even have to worry about any of it now, it was over, she could move on with her life.

It was supposed to be a happy thing, Rachel knew that, but she couldn't even muster up the strength to be happy.  
It wasn't like she was happy with The Joker constantly there, in fact he made her the most miserable she had ever been in her life, everything that he did, all the words and actions brought her nothing but misery, even with the pleasure there was the pain of knowing what she was lowering herself too.

So, he made her miserable but it seemed she couldn't be happy when he wasn't there either.  
Rachel sighed, Life just wasn't fair and so it seemed, neither was love.

"There we are, nice cup of tea... it should make you feel a bit better" Mara's voice entered the room as she walked in holding two mugs.

Mara placed the hot mug in her hand, and she supposed it should have scolded her hand, but the heat didn't seem to bother her at all.  
"Thanks" Rachel muttered.

Rachel could see out of the corner of her eye, Mara trying desperately not to stare at her, but she couldn't wipe the thoroughly confused look off her face.  
She had not said anything since Rachel's little announcement, she simply nodded her head and continued cleaning her wound before announcing that she was going to make some tea.  
It only made Rachel feel more awkward than she already did, if that was at all possible.

Rachel's fist clenched around the mug she was holding, a slow building anger burning through her.  
Why couldn't Mara just say what she wanted to say, say what she was thinking?

It seemed to her, that everyone lied and nobody ever said what they really meant, always hiding the truth behind false smiles.  
That was something that she was always fascinated with about The Joker, he always said what he was thinking, he never held back and no matter how disgusting he was, Rachel supposed that was something to be admired.

She tried to block out Mara's stares, those little looks that meant so much.  
'She thinks I'm crazy now, great!... that's me crazy Rachel' she thought her grip tightening even more.

Finally the tension in the room became too much,  
"Just say it Mara" Rachel said, not bothering to look at Mara's faux confusion.

"W...What... Uh ....say what?" Mara stuttered.

Rachel slowly turned her head to face Mara, her face was calm, no accusing glare marred her face but in her eyes was a look of tiredness that had not been there before.

"Say....what you're thinking.... about me" Rachel said drawing out her words as if she was talking to a child.

Mara turned away, seemingly unable to meet Rachel's intense look.

"Oh..... "Groaning Mara shook her head, before letting out a nervous laugh "I'm sorry Rachel, I am..... but... this whole thing is really starting to freak me out.... which is saying something my dear friend because _I _am slightly twisted myself but...... _loving _ The Joker... is a little bit too far".

Rachel didn't know why exactly, but her face broke out into a large toothy grin, laughter escaping her mouth.  
It seemed this only made Mara more confused.

"You're right... You are absolutely one hundred per cent _right_... I'm wrong.... I'm so wrong it's not even funny, god it's so wrong".  
Rachel's laughter only got louder, it seemed the numbness she had been feeling was ebbing away revealing nothing but twisted amusement, why exactly it was funny, she had no idea.

Mara frowned slightly "Something certainly seems funny" she muttered.

Rachel barely even heard her, her laughter too consuming, to her own ears, the laughter sounded off, didn't sound like her laughter.  
The loud cackles were underlined with sadistic amusement, something that was so familiar to her.  
It was this disturbing familiarity that caused a gut wrenching sob to mix with her laughter.

She felt Mara's hand gently pat her on the back soothingly but it did nothing to stop her sobs or her laughter.

"Okay.... You're kind of... starting to scare a wee bit now" Mara said

Rachel's laughter was bordering on painful for her now, the sobs ripping from her throat, the laughter choking her.  
She couldn't even get a breath in, her lungs were closing in on her and she couldn't breathe.  
God, she couldn't breathe.........

It was no longer The Joker she was crying about, or laughing about for that matter, it was herself.  
How..... Crazy she had become. How twisted she had become. Twisted enough to hear The Joker in her voice, to hear The Joker in her laugh, to see The Joker when she looked at herself in the mirror.

This is what she had become.

Rachel Dawes, she had always tried to do the right thing, it was the one thing that she had always been sure about in her life, even in the most messed up times.

_  
Do the right thing _

_Be a good person _

"God!" Rachel moaned burying her face in her hands; she wanted to hide her face. Her shame was eating away at her. She couldn't let Mara see her. She'd never be able to let anyone see her now, Not Harvey, not Bruce or Alfred or her other friends and family....  
The only person that she could allow to see her now was the person who had put her where she was in the first place...and he was gone. He screwed her up in the head, laughed at her, then split.

"That fucking _prick!" _ She screamed into her hands. "I hate him... _I hate him... _I swear to god if I ever see him again....... I'm going to _cut _that motherfucking freak's _dick_ off".

Rachel tried to catch her breath as she recovered from her outburst.  
Slowly she raised her head to look at the woman sitting next to her, a mixture of fear and sympathy written across her face.

"Blimey..... Quite a mouth you got on you don't ya......" Mara said her mouth slightly agape.

Rachel sniffed, wiping the tears from her puffy cheeks. "You must think I'm nuts Mara".

Mara nodded "Yeah... a little"

"What am I going to do?.........I don't even know... everything is so screwed up"

Mara paused, as if she was seriously thinking about what she was about to say, it made Rachel feel slightly nervous. Almost as if she was afraid of saying the wrong thing.

"Look Rachel, like I said, you've been through so much.... I think.... maybe you need to talk to someone... Harvey maybe-"

Rachel cut her off before she could say anything else, her voice hysterical "No... How could I ever tell Harvey about....any of this. It would ruin _everything.._ The look on his face, could you imagine the look on his face. He'll look at me... how I look at me"

"How's that?" Mara said.

Rachel scoffed shaking her head "A disgusting slut who let a murderous fiend touch her, who let someone who's dead inside make her... _feel _about him".

"Right... okay so maybe you don't have to tell Harvey everything... Or maybe you should talk to someone... like a doctor or something of the sorts?" Mara said.

Rachel's eyes narrowed slightly "You mean a shrink... Mara, if I told a shrink... half of the things that have been going on with me.... With me and The Joker... they'd send me to a padded room in Arkham!"

Mara's eyes filled with something that Rachel saw as pity, Mara felt sorry for her. Rachel felt her body tremble with anger, she hated pity, she hated the look in their eyes.  
God, those pitying eyes, she just wanted to the cut them out of her head so she wouldn't have to look at them.

"Don't pity me" Rachel mumbled glaring slightly.

"Look I'm Sorry... but I really do think this is all just you being confused.... spending all that time with The Joker.... it made you see things a little differently, it doesn't mean that its love Rachel... it's just... its.. Empathy"

Rachel's face softened, "Stockholm Syndrome..." she said nodding.

Mara nodded "Exactly..."

There was an almost calm silence that filled Rachel's apartment as she took in Mara's advice.

Rachel sighed "Maybe you're right... maybe... I should see someone.... "

Mara nodded again "I think it will help.... The freak's gone now; it can help you put all this freaky-assed psycho crap behind you".

"Okay... god I'm just so tired..... I feel like I haven't slept in weeks" Rachel said rubbing her tired and sore eyes.

"Come on then, off to bed with you Miss Dawes, because frankly girlie, you need it" Mara said once again eyeing her up and down.

Rachel rolled her eyes, she knew she must look awful but she thought that Mara would have the good sense not to throw it in her face at her most vulnerable point.

"And once again, thank you for that.... Look thanks for coming over here Mara, thank you for... being my friend and for not... judging, you don't have to stay I'll be fine by myself.... something tells me _he_ won't be making an appearance for a long...long time"

It looked as though Mara had barely listened; she shook her head while she helped Rachel off the couch and gently lead her towards her bedroom.

"No no and... NO. I don't have a shift at the hospital till' tomorrow, you're my friend, you're in a bit of a rough point, I'm going to stay and take care of you....besides you have a head injury, you should be in hospital, I want to stay here and make sure that you're okay".

There was a look of determination on Mara's face that gave Rachel the strong impression that nothing she said would make her change her mind, she figured that she could try and literally kick her out but frankly she just didn't have the strength.

"Fine.... and thanks" Rachel said before entering her room again.

Rachel frowned, how odd it was too actually have such a close friend again.  
It had been such a long time since she had a really close female friend, and her relationship with Bruce was somewhat on shaky ground at that point in time.  
It felt like new territory to have a good friend who cared but it felt nice.

She sunk into her bed, burying her face in the pillow, she inhaled.  
It smelt like him, that odd smell that always lingered around him, the smell that she could never really identify, it still hung in the air, even hours after he had left.

She felt another tear leak from her eye; this was going to be harder than she thought.  
Breaking an addiction normally involved lots of relapses, only she couldn't get her fix because there was only one Joker in the world and he was gone.

Something then caught her attention in the corner of her eye; Frowning Rachel leaned over to see a familiar looking Jack card sitting on her bed side table.  
Only this one had something else written on it,

_Things come back _

It was surrounded by a dozen sadistic looking red 'HA's'.

Rachel was confused, what did this mean? Did it mean that The Joker was going to make a return to Gotham in the future?  
she knew deep inside that this was not a good thing, but it didn't stop her from grasping the card in her hand and curling up into a ball.  
"Come back..." she whispered as she drifted to sleep.

* * *

_eek. I know its not my best.  
but its been awhile hehe _

_Oh well there are aspects that I like and aspects that I dislike about this chapter. _

_my favourite parts definitely writing The Joker's POV ... even if he is extremely hard to write  
XD  
_

_hope you all like it anyway _

_R&R  
_


	30. Chapter 30 Colour

HOPE EVERYONE HAD A VERY VERY MERRY MERRY CHRISTMAS XD

..... I didn't however because I spent the whole day wishing that my brother was there.  
its just not the same without him so that was a bit depressing.

but my sister did buy me 4 disc set of Batman Begins and The Dark Knight :)

* * *

**STOCKHOLM SYNDROME **

chapter thirty - Colours

_She can't even breathe among the madness  
the insanity inside eats away at her  
Will it ever come back?  
will she ever see anything but black  
she wonders..........  
the white is far away, lost among the fragments that were stolen  
it was taken from her, the white,  
the beauty, the innocence, the light.  
because it was always wrong that black was mixed with white and there was never any room for grey  
but grey weaved its way into her life,  
showing her truth and darkness and blurred lines  
whispering to her in blood, whispering to her in riddles and rhymes  
She can't even crawl her away out from the depths of black  
because she understands the grey, but she can't see it now_

_  
she's lost in the darkened room of her nightmare  
She is cold in the black, and broken too  
she is standing on the line in between them  
grey is gone, and white is lost  
She understands now, but at what cost?  
She wonders......  
in the empty darkness, among enemy lines  
She can't breathe, she's split in two  
like the white, she is lost.... with her hate and love, she is dead  
because now, in the black all she sees is red...._

Rachel did not know how long she had been asleep for. It did not feel like a long time at all, but in many ways it felt like she had been asleep for days. Ju st sleeping her way through the confusion, pain and odd feeling of loss. But she was awake now, her eyes were still squeezed firmly shut, shielding herself from the harsh rays of sunlight that were coming in from her window.

'Please...' she thought, desperate to hold onto that little piece of beautiful unconsciousness that seemed further and further away 'please, just let me stay asleep, I don't want to wake up and face today'.

She heard soft breathing coming from beside her, another reason she didn't want to wake up. Waking up meant facing Harvey. Rachel took in a deep breath, feeling the oxygen expand her lungs. She exhaled, her breathing shaky.  
She was trying to get a hold on herself, calm her nerves, nerves that seemed broken somehow. But it felt like every muscle in her body was trembling now as her mind slowly returned to reality.  
All the things that had happened, once again being put together in her mind like a jigsaw puzzle.

Her eyes, which had been closed, flung open as she felt warm arms encircle her waist, warm breath blowing on her neck.

Tears slipped from her eyes, sliding down her temple leaving little wet patches on her pillow.  
Rachel bit her lip, struggling to keep herself from sobbing out loud or jumping away from Harvey's arms. The sadness inside, the _thing_ that she felt all over, the deep, mind numbing, soul crushing sadness she felt was for many reasons and many different things.  
But at that moment, as she silently cried within her lover's arms she felt sad because of what was missing, what should have been there but wasn't.

She felt sad because his warm breath did not send those pleasant tingles down her spine and it wasn't setting her nerves on fire like it should have, like it normally did. She felt no desire to bury herself deeper in his embrace like she always had in the past, she felt no sweet warmth from his warm body, of course there was the warmth of his natural body heat but the warmth of his love was not penetrating her cold shell like it was meant to. All this, only made Rachel want to cry louder, because she was uncomfortable in the arms of the man she loved, because this man who she had given her heart to, who had given her _everything_, didn't make her _feel _ the way she used to and made her want to squirm away from him.

Of course she blamed _him_ for this, she wasn't sure what she hated him for most, being there in the first place to destroy so many lives in Gotham, taking her and destroying everything that she thought she knew about herself and showing her how low somebody could fall, for making her fall in love with him or for leaving........

More importantly... leaving her like this.... with this feeling inside, a feeling she couldn't shake. She hated him so much it hurt, there weren't enough words in the English dictionary to explain how much Rachel hated The Joker.  
She had always felt hatred for him. Even before she had met him at the fundraiser, the day it had all began, even before then she had hated him. Hated what he was, what he did.... just pure hate.

The hate she felt now was so much worse, because now the hate was stained and tainted. Tainted with love and that was so much harder because it was more than just hate now, it was a fiery burning hate that she felt all through her, even in her bones.

She hated more because of the love, the love that she felt for him, that made her want to protect him, made her want to just look at him, just touch him, understand him... it made her want to _hurt_ him and watch him bleed, to make him suffer, to make him _feel something, _ all of it just made her _hate_ so passionately and so painfully, it was a hate she had never felt before.

A blinding hate...entwined with a blinding love. Maybe you could never really have love without hate? After all you couldn't have happiness without pain.  
Maybe there was a thin line between everything in life. Perhaps The Joker was right about his idea's about the world. Rachel thought about everything, all the small things that had lead to this moment, questioning her love and her hate for the murderous man. It made her believe more about the things The Joker had told her. In those random moments when he would rant about the world, the way he saw things. Rachel had always felt like he had some kind of veil over his eyes, like a mental block shielding him from the reality, the truth of the world, making him truly believe in the horror that he had wrecked on the people around him.

Perhaps some of his views, were not so wrong after all, as disturbing as it was, as much as his views were seen as a madman's ranting, perhaps there was some basis in fact.

The Joker often talked about how people saw the world in black and white, there was good and evil, right and wrong, there was love and there was hate, now she knew better. Rachel would be honest with herself, she was one of those people, she didn't mean to be and she never considered herself judgmental. But she saw things in a certain way, like most people, the lines in life were very distinct and clear.... there was never any room for the lines to blur. How completely stupid and naive to think that way, Rachel thought and felt her jaw clench in anger at herself.

Life was so obviously not like that, in the world most people lived in the grey area, the lines were always blurred and in cases like The Joker, erased completely. The Joker always said if pushed everyone had the ability to be evil... to be wrong and to hate; everyone had the ability to be the villain. But did that also mean that everybody had the ability to do good and to love? Maybe... but something told Rachel that no amount of 'pushing' would make the Joker do good and love. The Joker could not love, and it seemed he could not _be_ loved either, he'd seen it in her, which she supposed was why he left.

_You_ _either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain_

Harvey's words echoed inher mind. Had Jack Napier ever been the hero? Somehow Rachel doubted it; she also doubted that she'd ever discover what happened after John and Christine Napier's deaths; something's were best kept buried.

So in the grand scheme of things maybe not all of what The Joker said was complete craziness.... there was no barriers in between different things, in life... everything was blurred. Including love and hate.

Rachel was bought out of her thoughts by the feeling of Harvey placing a soft kiss on her neck.  
Rachel's lips trembled and she fought the urge to sob, once again it felt empty. She did love Harvey which is why this was eating at her, making her insides twist, it was why it had to end..She couldn't keep doing this to him.

"How are you?" he said his voice so low it was almost a whisper.

Rachel tried to say something but it felt as though her throat was closing in on her.

"M' fine" she managed to croak out.

His fingers gently brushed her hair out of her face, touching her so softly like she was something to protect and cherish something fragile and breakable.  
He touched and treated her completely different than Bruce, completely different than The Joker. The bruises that she felt all over her body, the aching in all her joints from being thrown around like a rag doll, showed that The Joker didn't see her as breakable at all.

"Mara..?" she whispered in question.

"She was asleep on the sofa when I got here, it was....quite a surprise actually, when she woke up she explained what happened and then she went home".

Rachel's eyes widened at the 'she explained what happened' what did Harvey mean by that? Surely he didn't mean _everything_, Mara would not have done that..... Would she? She couldn't help the feeling of fear flow through her.

"What... do you mean she explained everything?"

Harvey scoffed "Well, she explained about what a klutz you are and how you tripped over and hit your head.... you have to be more careful Rachel!"

Rachel let out a large breath, feeling the overwhelming sense of relief at Harvey's words. Mara didn't tell him anything, thank god....

Rachel forced her lips into a small smile, trying to seem at least the tiniest bit believable "Oh yeah.... you know me lately....tripping over my own feet, don't worry Harvey I'm fine!.... I'll be more careful, I promise.

Harvey's eyes were filled with so much worry that Rachel felt guilty inside, like something dirty was clawing away at her. This wonderful man was worried about her, and she was......indifferent.  
She didn't understand why all of a sudden the warmth, the love that came with being close to Harvey Dent had disappeared, but it had and she didn't know if it would ever come back.

"You better" he whispered again before kissing her lips softly.

Rachel had managed to squirm her way out of Harvey's arms without him noticing, she really didn't want to hurt his feelings in anyway. The thought of seeing any form of rejection or hurt on his face was really too hard to bare, but then again could she really keep up a facade and continue to lie?

"Where did you go last night anyway?" Rachel asked with genuine curiosity.

"There was sightings of The Joker at a rundown warehouse and I was kind of in a rush" Rachel just about laughed, sightings of The Joker at a rundown warehouse? Somebody needed to get their eyes checked. There was no way that The Joker was there seeing as he was in her room at that time.

"Did you find him..?" she asked, she already knew the answer.

Harvey shook his head, all the frustration and work that had gone into finding The Joker evident in his eyes, in his face and in the way he talked. Rachel felt the sadness again, another reason to hate the Joker, for doing this to her Harvey. He looked so tired.

"No.... another dead end... but we did find out some more information about him".

Rachel stiffened, feeling herself sit up straighter in the bed her ears already focused on the words coming out of Harvey's mouth.

"W..what did you find out?" Rachel's voice was trembling slightly but she knew nothing she did would remove the shakiness in her voice.

"Not much.... but more than we had before. We looked into Jack Napier's past files" Harvey didn't seem to see her flinch at the mention of his name, it was hard hearing that name from someone's lips. It felt wrong. Jack Napier only existed for her, it seemed. In everyone else's eyes they only saw The Joker.

"He was a resident at Arkham Asylum for nearly two years.....but about three years ago he just disappeared, nobody ever heard of Jack Napier again"

Rachel looked away from Harvey, her eyes focusing on the other side of the room; she didn't dare look at him, because she knew that he'd see the shift in her eyes. The emotion that was working its way up her throat.

"So... he just escaped?"

Harvey nodded "Apparently. I just can't get over the fact that, if they had just done their jobs there, kept him.... strapped to a table for the rest of his life for all I care, then maybe The Joker would have never have come to Gotham at all"

Rachel's eyes fluttered closed, trapping her tears. In many ways, she wished that The Joker never came to Gotham, but the cruel image of him strapped to a table, withering away, drugged up and rotting. It wasn't the nicest image that Rachel had ever thought of. Even if it was someone as obviously messed up in the head as The Joker, the thought was unpleasant. Even more unpleasant for her thinking of him locked up in a padded room forever.

"The world would have been a better place...." Harvey muttered, she did not miss the bitter tone in his voice.

She felt her heart ache that little bit more at Harvey's bitter words, how different the world would have been... If The Joker had been locked away for the rest of his life, never escaping and never returning to Gotham. Rachel wondered if her life would have been any better than it was now.  
Would she have been happy? Some part of her figured, that yes she would have been happy, happy with her love for Harvey; her simple easy love that always warmed her from the inside out. She would have eventually been coaxed into marrying him; it wouldn't have been all that bad. Bruce would be there, in the distant crowd of the wedding. A smile on his beautiful face, both happy and sad and she would smile back at him in the same bittersweet way because they both knew that though their love would last forever, that it was better this way.

Alfred would be there too of course, with that proud fatherly smile on his face and he'd hug her and kiss her cheek and tell her how beautiful she looked.  
It would be lovely..... Rachel imagined how it would look, beautiful flowers and beautiful sunlight lighting everything up.  
She'd have children with Harvey one day, little round faced, blue eyed and blonde haired children.  
Gorgeous giggling little girls and hyperactive little boys that took after their father.  
It would be a wonderful life, Rachel thought to herself, it would have been the life that was normal, the life she was meant to lead, correct?

It was then, sitting on the bed, imagining all this, and the life that could have been had The Joker never been in any of their lives that she realized that she didn't want that life at all. How easy she had been coaxed into believing that that was the life for her simply because it was how the world worked. Because it was _all part of the plan_. But that was not what she wanted at all.....

Taking a deep shaky breath Rachel forced herself to look at Harvey.

"Is there anything else you found out about The Joker?" she asked.

He nodded and Rachel held her breath simply waiting "Not a lot..., Jack Napier was born 22nd of January 1978-"Rachel let out a strangled sound.  
His birth date, something that she could never get him to tell her and now she knew. She always knew he was quite young. Thirty years old....

Harvey frowned at her reaction but continued "He had a history of psychopathic tendencies... big surprise there. Then came the big stuff, The _Joker_ kind of stuff, the things he's doing now. So I'm guessing he's always been this way....a crazy freak".

Rachel flinched again, the way Harvey was talking about it was extremely harsh, she knew that it was justified and that made it worse.  
"Please don't call him that" she whispered, her voice was so quiet that it was almost inaudible.

Harvey raised his eyebrows, his expression one of confusion "What...?"

"Just... don't" she whispered as she stood from her bed, the room felt as though it was closing in on her, the walls were crushing her, the air being sucked out of the room. She couldn't breathe like this.  
"Rachel, are you alright" his voice was full of worry again. He leaned over and grabbed her hand in his.

"Please... I can't do this... I just-" she sobbed "_can't-" _ despite her attempts at putting on a brave face she couldn't help the way her voice broke, the tears finally making their way down her cheeks. She didn't give Harvey a chance to see though for she had already made her way to the bathroom locking the door behind her.

Rachel found herself pacing around her bathroom, her chest aching, the hole where her heart had been ripped out, burning and bleeding through.  
She clutched at her sides as if that would help, as if that would hold her together. No, she was falling apart; the little breakdown in front of Harvey just proved it. She couldn't do this, she couldn't pretend, she couldn't even breathe... She fought with every breath. The air catching in her throat, she was choking on it.

She looked up into the mirror, once again taking in her reflection. She had done this many times and she never got used to the image that she saw. How much she had changed, it always sickened her.  
Her eyes were large and watery, the tears cascading down her cheeks and dripping from her chin.  
She looked at herself, and she felt dirty... covered in dirt that she'd never be able to be rid of.  
Rachel covered her mouth trying to keep her sobs inside, she was dirty.....  
_look at yourself..... You're disgusting _

She had to get clean! She turned around so fast she nearly slipped over, she basically ripped her nightgown off and turned on the shower. She stood under the harsh spray desperate for it to wash away the dirt.

The water ran down her skin, the heat of the water almost burning, but she barely even felt it. She was still clutching her side and the sobs were still tearing from her throat.  
She couldn't keep it inside, her walls were crumbling, and her act was failing.  
A muffled voice came from outside the door, it was distant like an echo but she could still recognise the voice.

"Rachel... are you alright? Rachel what's going on?"  
Harvey's voice only made her sobs louder. Her legs were trembling and she slid to the floor of the shower, her legs buckling beneath her.

She continued to sit there under the spray of the shower, her arms wrapped around herself, the only thing that seemed to be holding her together. Her throat raw from the continuous cries that didn't seem to end.  
Eventually, the knocking and the muffled sound of Harvey's voice disappeared, she guessed through her pain and tears that he had decided to leave her be.  
She couldn't find the strength to care, she couldn't even find the strength to move from the shower once the heat of the water had disappeared, leaving the water cold, bordering on freezing.

In the darkness of her bathroom, under the cold spray of her shower, Rachel Dawes sat there, alone and trembling and couldn't do anything but cry.

* * *

R&R


	31. Chapter 31 AUTHORS NOTE : I'M NOT DEAD!

**I'M NOT DEAD I'M NOT DEAD!!!!!!!**

***cough* now we have that out of the way .**

**I AM SO SORRY to all those who have been following. waiting and.... waiting.... and waiting then getting absolutely no update at all!!!!**

**I have an excuse I swear!**

**im lazy....**

**no i'm kidding xD I was involved in a car accident a few months ago, so i've been recovering from that. and im started a pivotal year of school. **

**however. i do plan to get back into this story. Its still my baby and i care waaay to much about it and TheJoker and Rachel to simply leave it as it is  
be patient grass hoppers **

**i shall return!!!**

**hopefully in the next few days**

**thanks for all the reviews and the reads and the love.**

**can't get enough love here**

**thanks thanks THANKS**

**see ya soon *waves*  
**


	32. Chapter 31 Life

_alright so as you would have read in the authors note, i had a car accident a few months ago. but here i am mostly all better now xD and here is my.... woah thirty first chapter. I never ever expected to get this far. and I hope that you all still enjoy it and like it, because blimey is it some hard work. _

_so here we are CHAPTER THIRTY ONE .. in which **Rachel loses it. and realises just how much The Joker has affected her personality and her views on the world. hooray **_

_**

* * *

  
**_

**Stockholm syndrome **

**Chapter 31 **

_**Life **_

Rachel was not surprised to find that her apartment was empty, when she finally remerged from her bathroom.  
She guessed that Harvey assumed that she needed some alone time, she was grateful for that. The thought of having to face him, again was a bit too much to handle.

Rachel's eyes wondered over her empty apartment, the small items that lined her shelves and the pieces of furniture that made up who Rachel Dawes was.  
She scoffed, how pathetic, that people created their lives, defined themselves with nothing but mere _things. _

It didn't mean anything, nothing in her apartment meant anything to her, and yet before she would try so hard to have them, to keep them, because it was what was expected, it was how the world worked.  
Now she realised the truth, she felt it inside. "I don't care" she whispered to herself.

She didn't, there were no warm fuzzy feelings inside when she thought about all the nice furniture she owned, or the fact that all the hard work she had done over the years had earned her this apartment, she didn't even feel the warm fuzzy feelings when she looked at her pictures, photo's of all the memories of her life, on show.

Rachel slowly walked towards the photo's, and her eyes travelled over the smiling faces of her friends and family. Her eyes landed on one in specific, it was an old photograph of her and Bruce. At least 6 years prior, at another party, another fundraiser, another function… another time.

Bruce looked young and happy, his eyes still haunted, but not marred with the responsibility of batman. Her own eyes twinkling with the cheekiness and happiness that she used to feel all the time, simply being in Bruce's presence. She loved him so much, it was written all over her face, In many ways six years was not a lot at all and it felt like yesterday, and in some ways six years felt more like 20 and it felt like a lifetime ago. What happened to the girl in the photo? She wondered.  
In just a few months, that girl had crawled inside and built a wall around herself, shielding herself from the world that The Joker showed her. The cruel world.

The _real _world.

Rachel figured that most people would say that ignorance was bliss, but as upsetting as it was to her, she was thankful. Thankful that The Joker had shown her what people were really like, what people were capable of, what she herself was capable of.  
There was no other person that would have shown her the honesty of the human condition.

It was strange to think that a man, who seemed to have strayed so far from humanity would be the one to show her the truth about the human condition. Strange, and ironic.

Sighing in defeat, Rachel turned away from the photos and in turn, turned away from the smiling Rachel Dawes she used to be.

* * *

Taking a sip of her iced tea, Rachel's eyes wondered over the printed words on the page in front of her.  
Gotham's number one newspaper currently had an article on the missing clown prince.  
Where was he? Was he dead? Where did he go? why did he leave? Blah blah blah… Rachel sighed, it had been a fortnight since The Joker had left and to say that the _lack _of disaster and chaos had the city reeling was an understatement.

It seemed nobody knew what to do with themselves now that they didn't have The Joker there to worry about, to be afraid of.  
As sick as it sounded to Rachel and she automatically cringed just thinking about it, it seemed that Gotham had grown so used to having the madman there in a way, they needed him now.  
they needed the bad to level out the good in the city, to be the yin to Batman's yang.

Rachel looked up, her eyes wondering over the other people in the small café on the corner, ordinary people living out their day. She supposed she looked like any other person, albeit slightly beaten and bruised but any other person all the same.

Nobody would give her a second glance, not really, they'd look at her and see 'Oh its just assistant DA, Harvey Dent's girlfriend… oh no wait, _fiancé, _well doesn't she look like shit lately, what's with all the bruises and that ugly scar on her face'

Rachel huffed to herself and felt a bitter smile pull at her lips. Bruises and scars left by _him_, he had to leave her something of him behind right, why not something permanent like a lovely scar? She unconsciously ran her fingers over the healing wound on her cheek. The doctors said it was healing nicely, that it might not even leave a scar, or if it did it would fade with time. It didn't make her feel any better.  
She could still feel it under the pads of her fingers. As she ran her fingers over the lacerations she could still remember how it felt to have the cool blade of a knife in her mouth, ripping them open, the texture of a leather glove grasping her face and the combined smell of blood, alcohol and sweat. Rachel gagged, squeezing her eyes shut trying to rid herself of the memory.

Life, in the last two weeks had been so _strange_; Rachel couldn't even find the words to explain it. She did not break into uncontrolled sobs anymore at the mere mention of The Joker, thank god! She didn't want to have to explain that anymore.  
However, he still haunted her dreams, taunting her, laughing at her, his eyes would be cold and harsh and empty and it would feel like he was plunging his knife in her chest, then he'd change, his eyes softening that little bit, that twinkle coming back just the tiniest sparkle, his smirk would widen sadistically and he'd embrace her, and even though she was always petrified with terror, she'd lean into him, and feel that familiar burning inside, and it was not comforting or warm or fuzzy, it was violent and hard and she _needed _ it… no, more in fact she _wanted _ it.

It was the same, every time, she'd wake up screams echoing throughout her apartment, hell, throughout the whole building. She wouldn't be surprised if her screams had woken up the entire city! She was always shaking and her sheets would be drenched with sweat.  
Harvey hadn't even stayed over after the first few nights; she supposed that he was unable to deal with her screams anymore. She couldn't blame him.

'Oh, Harvey' Rachel thought sadly to herself. She knew she had been quite cruel to him in the past two weeks.  
She knew that she was pulling away from him and she knew that it was hurting him.  
But she couldn't seem to help it, she preferred to be on her own.  
She had seen Bruce a few times, it was slightly strained, but she didn't feel the need to pull away from him like she did with Harvey.  
She supposed it was because she knew that Bruce had been damaged by The Joker too, she could relate now, she understood him so much better now that she knew all the things that he had to deal with on a daily basis, the darkness inside. She felt it too.  
Harvey, in all his wonderful goodness had not been damaged, he was still hopeful and looking forward to the prospect of a crime free Gotham.  
Rachel felt her eyes well up with tears, a crime free Gotham was an impossible wish.

She couldn't feel the warmth or the happiness or the joy with Harvey anymore because she'd been frozen by The Joker's truths.  
You can't unlearn the truth, she couldn't continue on with her life exactly as it had been mere months before.

Harvey, her dear Harvey, she loved him she knew that she did, but she didn't know if she could be with him anymore. She had changed too much, and she knew that he was starting to see her now, in the past two weeks, he had seen dark Rachel, the girl with the half smile, broken and still laughing, Rachel, her eyes never being quite as honest. Rachel with the lying mouth, who had never lied so much in her life. Rachel with that held up anger and…. She felt it all over.  
She could feel it in his gaze, when Harvey would look at her and she knew that he could see the change in her eyes, her eyes would have no doubt told him that she was missing something, some part of herself she supposed.  
Her mouth, with all their lies, spilling forth like those broken 'I love you's', he would hear it in her voice that there was an edge that told of secrets and blood and chaos….. of _him_.

She couldn't live like this…. Two weeks felt more like two years. Everyday was a milestone. Rachel was surprised that she was even still breathing. She felt horrible for all that she had done, she also felt horrible for how she felt. How could she let Harvey down of all people?  
He was always there for her, even now in her trance-like state he would still hold her and kiss her lips and gently brush her hair out of her face.  
Treating her like she were made of glass, little precious broken Rachel, must not be too harsh with her, she'll break under the pressure! Poor little girl, lost in the world, missing the violence, missing the sick power.  
Where is the hate…? Poor _Miss Dawes_ desperate for a hate so consuming, desperate for a love that's painful.

Rachel clenched her fist, her fingernails digging deeply into the skin of her palm.  
'STOP' she screamed inside her head 'leave… just leave me for good. No… don't go. Stay!. Come back, show me the world… show me the truth. Teach me more. Don't let me go'

Her thoughts were running a million miles an hour; she could barely keep up with her own thoughts.  
But she couldn't do this, not here, not in public, sitting by herself in the middle of a corner street café!

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, feeling herself relax.

"Rachel!" A voice called out to her in the distance.

Rachel's eyes shot open as saw a woman nearly bouncing in excitement hurry towards her.

"Mara!" she said, smiling politely.

She hadn't seen Mara since that incident in her apartment; she would be lying if she said she wasn't avoiding her at all costs.  
This was to be expected seeing as she confessed that she loved The Joker.  
Rachel inwardly cringed thinking back on the conversation. What was she thinking? She should have just kept her big scarred mouth shut!

Mara's cheeks were flushed like she had been running a great distance, her hair was slightly messy and her grin was so wide that her cheeks must have hurt.

Sitting down Mara laughed giddily

"Fancy seeing you here, I was beginning to think you've been avoiding me!" she said looking at her in a way that clearly said "I know what you've been doing!"

Rachel scoffed nervously "me? Avoid you…. No, of course not Mara, I've just been busy you know. With work and things" her filthy lying mouth. Rachel felt her stomach clench and tie itself in knots. Work had not been busy at all; it seemed that since The Joker had left, the criminals had decided to take a small holiday too.

Mara raised her eyebrows "Right, if you say so, but honestly, how are you? You uh… well you look better than last time I saw you, but still look a little bit shit".

Rachel smiled "Yeah, can't say that I'm feeling great…_honestly_".

Her face was sympathetic and Rachel diverted her eyes, paying great attention to her iced tea. She knew that Mara was feeling sorry for her and Rachel hated it, but she didn't want to make Mara feel bad, she needed all the friends she could get. With the way she was going her list of friends and family were rapidly shrinking.

"How….. Are you dealing with…. Err….him not being here anymore. I mean the city sure looks a lot better, _I'm _feeling a lot safer too, But how are you feeling?" she asked.

Rachel sighed, "Am I feeling safer? Definitely….. How am I feeling... lost and very.. _confused_. Do I want him here? No... and yes. Do I think about him….." without warning, it was like a dam burst and tears flooded from her eyes "everyday".

Mara reached over and covered Rachel's hand with her own in comfort.  
"I'm sorry Rach".

Rachel wiped her tears away quickly, she didn't want this, she knew she was stronger than bursting into tears randomly.  
"Yeah, so am I. but it doesn't matter anymore, he's gone and its for the best…clearly".

"Yeah definitely for the best… but, have you thought about what I said, before. About seeing someone, just to talk"

Rachel nodded "You think I should see a shrink, you know what, I don't think so. I mean, I've already shared way too much with you; I can't talk to anyone about this. I don't _want _to, this is mine. And it's all I have of him and I don't want to cheapen anything and share it around like…. Like a sob story. It's wrong and shameful but its mine, and his and I told you because I needed a friend, I don't need a shrink Mara! I don't want people to judge me like I judge myself every single day. I don't need to hear what I already know. You think I don't see it in your eyes, when you look at me".

Mara opened her mouth to say something but Rachel held her hand up and cut her off –"No, I don't want to hear it. I am not stupid.. or blinded. I _see _everything now. I can see the truth, I don't need that… that comfort of things going…. according to plan.  
You see me as disturbed, you think I need help… you, think I'm _crazy _that I need a… fucking psychiatrist to tell my sick story too, how I was kidnapped and beaten and abused and fell in love with my abuser? Think I need to share around our _beautiful_ masochistic love story Mara? Think that it will help me. That if I just talk about how I feel inside with a complete stranger that It will magically be okay again. That I won't see him in my dreams every night and… want to hold him and want to kill him at the same time. That I won't feel him every time I move because of the scars I have or that I wont see _him _every single time I look in the mirror!"

Rachel was hysterical and she knew that some of the people in the café were probably listening in on her conversation in great confusion

She wouldn't be surprised if the next headline on the Gotham newspaper was something along the lines of  
Assistant DA Rachel Dawes has mental breakdown. She didn't care.

Rachel ran of her fingers of the scar on her neck and face "He did this to me, he nearly slit my throat, and he cut my face and he gave me his pain, he shared it with me. You want me to _share _it with someone who couldn't possibly understand? NO! I think I've shared enough don't you? How could I possible lay down what I feel?  
how can I possibly be okay with _how _I feel. I am not okay; you ask me how I'm dealing with things? What the hell do you think? _God_…. The world, with all your _good intentions…_thinking that you're a good person, you're nothing but _sheep. _you just…._follow _each other around waiting for something to happen to make _yourself _feel better. But you know what… when push comes to shove, you'll only care about yourself, your like….like cannibals, you'll fucking eat each other just to get ahead. The Joker's a monster because he tells the truth?! The truth you don't want to hear! Well you know, yes he is a monster but you know what, everybody is these days. It's all relative, depending on what you call a monster. He murders people and creates a sense of chaos just to show _us _how we really are in the world. We are _alone _desperately clinging to any thing we can, that's why we grab and pull at each other, fuck each other, and screw each other over. We are alone because in the end, we only care about ourselves, our own sick stupid impulses, nothing but …._animals. _That's all we are Mara, given the right push, we simply fall into….madness. Its all it takes, no matter how good we are, _one little push _and we throw _everything _away. You want to know how I am feeling. Well, living in a world like this, with people like you all around me, knowing the truth now, it makes me sick. That's how I feel, just sick and tired. Why pretend anymore…. Why not just… _be_"

When Rachel finally finished she was breathing hard and there was a numbness spreading out across her body, the words seemed to pour from her mouth. Those bitter hurtful, wrong words spilling out.

Mara looked shocked and scared and….sad.  
She shook her head, her energetic playfulness so dull, her eyes didn't hold their usual twinkle, they simply looked sad.

"You even sound like him" she whispered.

The world stopped, Rachel gasped feeling bile rise in her throat, sweat breaking out on her skin. She felt her head spin; everything around her was getting out of control.  
Her stomach lurched, stomach acid rising in her gut.

She swallowed trying desperately to stop her nausea, but nothing helped.

'You even sound like him' Mara had said... she knew the words coming out of her mouth were wrong and ridiculous but she couldn't seem to stop herself. It wasn't her talking, it was The Joker's words coming out of her mouth.

It was this thought that sent Rachel out of her chair, running into the public bathroom of the cafe.

Rachel burst into the bathroom door, doubling over she retched into the toilet bowel, feeling her lunch make a return.

'That would be right' she thought absentmindedly as she vomited 'spent a good $15 on lunch and its completely wasted!'

Rachel groaned and she clutched at her heaving stomach, she had stopped vomited but it still felt like there was something doing summersaults in her guts. Her legs gave out. As she sat there on the filthy public bathroom floor she couldn't help but let her mind wonder to The Joker.  
It had been two weeks since she saw him, and she was an absolute mess, she doubted that she would be any better if he had been there; maybe she would have been even worse dealing with another two weeks of the madman's taunting.

But she still could not help but wonder. How was she supposed to do this? She had asked herself this every day since The Joker had left, how was she supposed to be the Rachel that everybody knew?

Something had changed inside her and a piece of her was missing, like he took it without permission, took that piece of her and ran off with it laughing with glee at the fact that she was left behind.

_  
_  
Finally it seemed that her stomach had settled somewhat, and she managed to stand on her shaky legs.

Rachel was surprised to see Mara waiting for her in the bathroom. She had expected that after her insane outburst that Mara would have been scared off.

"Are you okay?" Mara asked

Rachel gave a small nod, splashing some water on her face "I'm sure at one point I turned inside out... but yes, I'm okay" she mumbled.

Mara chuckled, "Still got that senses of humour don't you, maybe that's why he liked you so much, I mean... The Joker... because of his name, and a person with that kind of a name would like someone... um... who...Was able.. To uh... have a sense of... laughter... Or be able to... you know what... I'm just going to shut my mouth".

Rachel's lips twitched but her face muscles refused to let her smile. "It's okay..."

"I'm sorry" Mara said again

Rachel shook her head "No, if anyone's sorry it's me, I can't believe what I said before, all that stuff.... it wasn't.... I didn't mean....." she took a deep breath

"I've just been going through some stuff and I'm not sure about anything anymore and that was a bunch of rambling and it wasn't me, I don't think that way...... I _didn't_ think that way before... h-he kind of puts things into your head, The Joker... he says all this stupid and _insane_ stuff but he... tricks you almost into thinking and believing things. He loves to bring you down to his level..." Rachel scoffed, bitterly and felt tears cascade down her cheeks "Looks like he won our game".

"Blimey.... but that's what I'm saying, this isn't you Rachel, I know I didn't know you before, but I think I can tell that this just doesn't seem like you, these feelings and all that, It's just that freak getting to you, making you think you feel a certain way, But you don't. Not really"

"Yeah... maybe" Rachel said, she knew that Mara was only trying to help but she couldn't help but want to say 'Don't tell what I think and feel'.

She decided to keep her mouth shut, she'd already said too much today, she didn't want to lose Mara as a friend.

Mara gently pulled her into a friendly hug, Rachel accepted the hug and she rested her head on Mara's shoulder. But her eyes were vacant and glassy, as she stared at herself over Mara's shoulder in the bathroom mirror. She couldn't help but notice how bitter her eyes looked, they were not completely hollow, they were rimmed with tears, and they were bloodshot but they were cold. They were stranger's eyes.

When they pulled back Mara smiled, trying to force all her happy energy into one smile. "It's alright now darling, he's gone... and you can begin to pull yourself together and move on yeah?"

Rachel smiled and nodded "Yeah".

Mara looked at her watch "Well, I have a shift at the hospital, but we'll catch up soon okay. Bye!" she waved and left and Rachel stood by herself in the bathroom of the cafe.

Her face was ashen and her cheeks were still wet with tears. She brushed her hair out of her face and straightened out her crinkled outfit.  
It would be okay... she told herself again, like she did every day.

_It would be okay. _

_She would be okay. _

Things were difficult now and even though she felt as though every passing day was like another weight added to her shoulder, eventually with The Joker's absence she would get over it.  
She didn't know how futile these attempts to convince her were, but she refused to give up.

He's gone... Mara had said, The Joker is gone. But what Mara clearly hadn't remembered was that sometimes... things come back.  
Rachel smiled her first real honest smile for what felt like years as she remembered The Joker's message.

"Sometimes things come back" She whispered to her reflection.

* * *

hehehehehehe r & r dudes.


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